To not allow DS to give his friend money?

[ChickenSkin]

DS has two friends. He's been trying to arrange a day out with them for the easter holidays but they keep saying they have no money. Anyway today one of them miraculously has money and DS was getting ready to go. I got suspicious, logged onto his facebook and it turns out he offered to give the friend £10 to go out with.

AIBU to not allow this? they're 13 btw.

Ah, let them do it. If your DS wants to do something then surely it's for his benefit anyway?

Is it your money or is it DS's own money he is dishing out? If it is his own (as in saved up pocket money etc) I'd be inclined to let him lend it... But lend only, not give.

If nothing else, it may serve as a valuable lesson in why not to lend money to friends if it doesn't get returned.

Its a lesson I wish I'd learnt with a tenner at 13 and not the £500 I lent to a boyfriend at 18 never to be seen again.

YABU - but only if it is his own money and is lent, not given

ok, I'm such an unsociable creature I can't imagine lending someone money just so that they come out with me for the day! but I guess DS is not me and he quite likes other Human company I'll let it go.

Your son sounds like a generous boy. YABU.

He is Squeaky - don't know where he's got it from because it isn't me and it certainly isn't his father!

:o other human company = your DS entertained for a day.

I definitely agree with MissKeith's point. 13 is an excellent time to learn not to lend what you can't afford to give away.

We used to do this all the time as kids - pool together our pocket money so we could all go out. We still do it as adults to a certain extent, haven't you ever treated a friend OP?

what is wrong with treating a friend?

No Valium, never a lender nor a borrower be tight bastard

I can sympathise with your son.
It sounds like either he lends/gives his mate some cash or he is stuck in with nothing to do.
I remember as a student a couple of mates passing me money in the pub toilets(!) so that I could buy the next round.
I would let it go.

I was the same as Valium, we always pooled our money together

Kids soon know (just as adults do) if someone takes the piss on a regular basis.

Yabu AS long as its a genuine friendship and your DS is not 'bribing' people to go out with him- that would be a bit ick.

But yeah, friends share money,especially at 13 with no mortgage/commitments!

You've never bought a friend a coffee because you know they are a bit skint? I'm stunned.

This is just what teenagers do, isn't it? We certainly used to pool our resources (and in fact my best oldest pal and I still argue about who owes whom a tenner from 1987 ). Some have more than others, it's the right time to learn about sharing, lending, paying back, etc.

[old gimmer emoticon]

It sounds like a perfectly normal behaviour to me. Boy and friends want a day out. Not all of the group has enough money. Money is lent so that day out is made possible. It's what friends do.

I'd be slightly bothered if the only way that your ds could sustain a friendship was to buy it but I'm assuming this isn't the case.

Have you never found yourself in a similar situation and needed to sub a mate, OP, even for a coffee?