To complain all the time?

[ivanapoo]

I am gathering a reputation for complaining about things going wrong, poor service, faulty products etc. I went for a manicure a few days ago and the beautician managed to file the skin on my finger leaving what is now a slightly painful scab. (first world problems, I know)

I asked a friend if I should complain and she replied "knowing you, you will anyway!"

Another time we'd ordered takeaway and it was an hour late arriving. I wanted to phone up the restaurant and tell them they were out of order but my friends said no.

I also phoned my local supermarket after a product was faulty. It wasn't an expensive thing. They send me a voucher to say sorry and I was actually secretly pleased with myself...

AIBU? I guess most people just let it go and think I'm a massive annoying busybody with too much time on my hands...

I'm actually quite a positive, laid back person and don't make an unwarranted fuss but I do just tend to speak up when something is wrong.

Complaining is all about the delivery.

You can complain in a constructive, polite way.

If you are one of those loud-voiced women who has a face like a slapped arse and a sense of entitlement about anything and everything then YABU.

If more people complained customer service might improve. My sister has been living in the States for the last 10 years and is shocked by the general attitude and lack of customer service here. Of course lots of places are good but lots are shocking.

In the restaurant i worked at a customer complained to me that her tea was too hot! and the cup was too heavy!! Sigh

hex are you saying that i dont have standards?

there was nothing wrong with the room... why should she get an upgrade just because she complained

if you are paying a reasonable amount you expect to get a reasonable service.

ivanapoo you are in danger of getting a reputation, in fact it sounds like you have one already. do you complain about things that others find acceptable? or do people hide behind you and give you things to complain about because they are too shy to do it themselves?

I know one or two who complain just to get freebies. I wouldn't complain about the manicurist. She made a mistake. What will happen if you complain? She might get sacked. Presumably she apologised at the time.

whatsallthefuss, there was nothing wrong with the room in your opinion. You seem to think that your sister needs your approval or permission to complain. I didn't say you have no standards, but you have differing ones to your sister, clearly. As I said, differing standards don't mean that you are right and your sister is wrong.

I really couldn't care less whether someone judges me or disapproves if I complain, all that matters is that I am not satisfied with the product or service I have received.

Valium, I totally agree. Americans think nothing of complaining and of being vocal about their demands and expectations.

But if you follow that to it's logical extreme people could complain about anything they personally find unsatisfactory - for example if they think a meal is too small, or they don't like the colour of their bedspread, or the pate doesn't taste just as they think pate should. If service is given in good faith and it is acceptable to the vast majority of customers does it neccessarily follow that the one who doesn't find it acceptable is right?

The manicurist didn?t apologise, no. I was thinking of saying that the lovely lady who did my manicure did a great job except for the finger-filing ? I was going to tell them thinking that maybe they don?t realise they could be putting customers off by accidentally hurting them.

They also overcharged me slightly (only by £1) but I wasn?t going to mention that.

I've decided to leave that one though as it sounds like it's just part of getting a manicure (I've not had a proper one for a v long time) and the place is really near my house so I would use them again and don't want them to turn me away!

I?m not one of those ?smacked-arse-faced complainers? who will complain for the sake of it though - at least I think I'm not?!

For example the other day I received a slightly sub-standard meal where bits of it weren?t that hot and others were undercooked, but I ate it anyway because it was just about ok and I didn?t want to make a fuss.

I have indeed complained about hotel rooms before, but that because the bedlinen was obviously dirty, there were cockroaches, the bedside light didn?t work properly meaning I had to stumble in the pitch black to the bed from the main light switch and the (stinky basement) room was freezing.

Interestingly, I don?t think I?d go to the restaurant again because they didn?t have a chance to put things right, but I would probably go back to the hotel who gave me a much nicer room in the end? after I literally begged!

I think my friends just see me as a bit of a blagger/bargain hunter (I will barter where appropriate, if we go to a hotel for a special occasion I might ask if they?re not busy if there?s a chance of an upgrade or try to get a last-minute rate, that kind of thing) and the complaining thing is just part of that.

I wouldn't have eaten a meal that was not piping hot and would've complained.

I would also complain about someone filing my finger so I ended up with a scab!

There are 'nice' ways to bring something to someone's attention, you don't have to insist on people getting the sack.

Exactly, valium, it's all about being courteous. I usually make a point, if possible and when appropriate, of making it clear that I think problems usually come down to management/training rather than front-line staff, and that rather than complaining about an individual I'm pointing out something that the company might be able to improve. Again, if a member of staff was pleasant and professional but the product or service they supplied wasn't good enough but it wasn't their fault, I'll always make clear that it's not the staff member I had a problem with, and emphasise how helpful/pleasant/whatever they were.

Forgetting the 'not so good and celebrating the kindnesses that we see all the time if we take the time, makes me feel better generally. IMO too many people complain, too few praise and lots of people feel grumpy and unhappy a lot of the time. We are all human beings trying to function, survive and be happy, we all sometimes make mistakes too.

Did anyone see 'One Night' recently? It was a good example of what you see/get is not always the real picture. Applying the benefit of doubt rather than ruminating on 'being wrongly done by' helps us all to feel better, I think. I realise this is terribly Pollyanna-ish!

Also, I'm sure 'all the complainers' in life are under the impression they are making life better or 'improving' the service for themselves and other people. Do you know how horrible it is to receive a complaint? It is a very demotivating thing to receive and people are so ready to dish complaints out without thinking about the ripple effect or consequences. Think before you act. As I said before, it is a human being you are attacking.

grammar, complaining/giving feedback to companies doesn't make me feel 'grumpy and unhappy', because I only do it when I'm sure it's justified and, as discussed in my last post, I always try to do it in a calm, non-personal, rational way. I also mentioned (and I'm sure I'm not alone) that rather than 'attack' individuals (what an emotive word, by the way) I always go through appropriate channels e.g. to a manager or customer services, and make clear that I believe the problem to be a management or training issue e.g. not down to any one individual.

LadyClarice I'm not against giving feedback at all, in a rational, calm and non-personal way. But the OP used the word 'complain' which has the tone of querrulousness in this context, she is worried about getting a reputation... It is when the default switch is turned to 'complain' rather than appraising the situation calmly and rationally and thinking about the outcome of your complaint.
I could't care less if someone judges or disaprovesif I complain. All that matters is that I am not satisfied with the product/service received
It sounds like you couldn't care less, about anyone, Hexagonal

I get the impression that the OP is using the word 'complain' not in a particularly emotional or querulous sense, but in the sense of 'making a complaint' to a company. I don't understand the phrase to mean being querulous, or unpleasant. And she's worried about getting a reputation because people have said 'Knowing you, you will complain', which is kind of their issue rather than hers.

grammar No. I don't know what it's like to receive a complaint. I do, however know what it's like to work in the service industry. I have worked in many, many customer service positions for many, many years and not once have I received a complaint about my performance. Why do you think that is?

I am not going to apologise for complaining about poor service and I really don't care if it hurts anyone's fragile sensibilities. If someone don't want to be complained about, they should do their job better. Customer service isn't actually all that hard.

And I do just want to say, you can always tell when someone is just having a bad day or is a bit flustered, and when they just don't care.

I regularly contact companies if something I've bought breaks etc. I always do it in a nice way & if it's by phone I end up making them laugh. I asked Vidal Sassoon if they knew what might be wrong with my straighteners-a fuse? And they sent me a new pair. I bought a soap dish that went rusty after 1 week, got money back. Sent a letter to crisp company saying I love their crisps but this bag had all green ones in it & my colleagues are all the other bags, they sent me a box of crisps!
I work in hospitality, so people who complain about nothing melt my head, but OP isn't one of those. We all work hard for our money and if a product doesn't do what it's supposed to the corporation should sort it!

Polite complaints - especially constructive ones - are fine and good. What would be nice is if people wrote in to say nice things too!