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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

WIBU to insist that my parents bring a booster seat for my neice?

26 replies

Psammead · 02/04/2012 10:15

I feel that I was not.

My parents and my neice are coming to visit for 10 days over the Easterbreak. They are flying, we live on the continent and they are in the UK. I phoned them to remind them of little things they would need, like swimming stuff for DN, her pencil grip, her camera and her booster seat. They told me they were not planning to bring one. DN is 7.8 and around 3'9". I told them that 1. We were not going to risk being on the wrong side of the law, and 2. I was not willing to see DN get horrifically injurued in case there is an accident because she had no booster seat.

I can't believe they were willing to risk it and would just have turned up at the airport with nothing. My family think I'm being overly concerned, and that it's an awkward item to bring.

I told them I would buy on myself here but they agreed to bring their one with.

I don't have older children so I don't know how vital they are, but I really feel that IWNBU.

OP posts:

MardyBra · 02/04/2012 10:15

Can you hire or borrow one?

KatAndKit · 02/04/2012 10:16

She needs a booster seat as she is neither old enough nor tall enough not to use one. You are right that it is the law. But since they have agreed to bring one the problem has already been solved.

MardyBra · 02/04/2012 10:16

Not sure what the law is where you are, but children need to be 135cms to ditch their set in UK.

Original poster

Psammead · 02/04/2012 10:18

I don't know anyone who has one who wouldn't need it themselves over Easter, IYSWIM.

Hire? Umm. No idea where from. Never occured to me tbh.

OP posts:

nobutyeahbut · 02/04/2012 10:19

YANBU - all children should be in a booster seat until they exceed the specified height.

My parents have boosters at their house for my dd's and i would not let them in a car without one.

We have also taken them on planes before incase none were available at the other end.

KatAndKit · 02/04/2012 10:20

They aren't expensive. If they don't want to bring one because of baggage allowance or whatever you can get one for less than a tenner.

www.tesco.com/direct/tesco-my-baby-voyager-booster-seat/206-4508.prd

MardyBra · 02/04/2012 10:20

I've hired them from car hire companies, but only when hiring a car. I don't know if they'd hire them out without a car.

AChickenCalledKorma · 02/04/2012 10:22

I have hired one from a very useful firm near where my parents live. They hire out all sorts of baby equipment - and also booster seats for older kids. But I agree that if it's a straightforward booster without a back, buying one at your end would be pretty cheap and much less hassle.

Original poster

Psammead · 02/04/2012 10:23

I know, Kit, I did offer to buy one, but by then I hadbeatenthem into submission

I know the issue is now resolved, but I have a reputation with my family and basically everyone else too, for being a bit bull-headed and it makes me a it paranoid about how I handle these things. I am worried I laid it on too thick over an issue that didn't really matter.

OP posts:

KatAndKit · 02/04/2012 10:31

Safety does matter. Your parents won't get that because they will remember the days when you could cram eight children into the back seat and no worries about seat belts either. But you are right to insist on following the law.

MrsMuddyPuddles · 02/04/2012 10:43

I don't think you are, but then I can be bull headed about things too :o

It's apparently only a (probably) £30 fine without one (up to £500 if you go tou court), but like you say, why risk it for the girl's sake? source: news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/uk/4781511.stm

FWIW, I would have said "I am not driving her without one, and it's my driving liscence that would suffer so there" (possibly in a less childish manner) and end the discussion.

Hope they (and you!) enjoy the visit

callmemrs · 02/04/2012 10:44

Hmm... I would have been a tad irritated at being phoned up and reminded to bring a pencil grip!
Re the booster seat- they said they weren't planning on bringing one, which seems highly sensible to me- her own may be very bulky so it makes far more sense to fly over and organise one the other side- which is now done.

Anyway- surely this is an issue for the nieces parents (or usual carers) to sort out? I would assume that packing has already been discussed, and if the parents/carer specifically wanted her usual booster seat to be taken on the flight, they would have organised and booked it on as extra luggage?

pictish · 02/04/2012 10:46

Booster seats are well cheap. They can buy one when they get here can't they? Or you can?
We got one for £12 recently.

mummytime · 02/04/2012 10:51

You can get ones designed for travel which don't take much room but have passed the safety standards. Trunking one, or Bubble Bum.
yANBU

pictish · 02/04/2012 10:56

Or you can buy one for tenner when they get here, and not worry about it for another second.

Nanny0gg · 02/04/2012 11:05

Wouldn't it have been easier for you to organise one?
They're surely a right pain to have to lug on a plane.
And shouldn't her parents be organising everything else she needs to bring?

callmemrs · 02/04/2012 11:08

Are your parents the main carers? If so, then presumably they have a booster seat which they normally use, but decided it was too bulky for travel so are happy to organise one your side. Also, some seats fit fantastically well in one vehicle but for some reason don't transfer quite as easily to others- so if they are unfamiliar with the car you'll be using, they probably thought it best to fit one your side?

If your parents aren't your nieces main carers, I'm a little confused as to why you didn't address her parents directly? I would have called them and asked, are you planning to send her own booster seat or do you want me to organise one this end?
Its a perfectly straightforward request, and doesn't need to involve any unreasonableness tbh!

Original poster

Psammead · 02/04/2012 12:29

My parents were not planning on organising anything at all. They were happy to let her go without completely. Neither were DN's parents. They said to stop being silly when Ioffered to buy one, and said they would bring theirs. I would have been, and still am, perfectly happy to get one. They will need it directly when they arrive so it had to be sorted beforehand, imo.

Re: pencil grip - she has learning difficulties and cannot write without her special one and I plan on her filling out a holiday diary here.

OP posts:

Scholes34 · 02/04/2012 12:42

They are really cheap. I'm sure you'd find it useful to have a spare one anyway in your car. I always had one for taking other children in my car. Can you not run to buying one. If you'll be doing the driving, won't you be the one responsible for the safety of passengers in the car?

Original poster

Psammead · 02/04/2012 12:46

Yes, I am starting to think that's the best option now, really. I feel cross that my parents were just going to risk it, but I do understand that it is a bit of a pain to lug around. I saw some in a local shop for around 7 euro, but I fugured they were cheap and possibly dangerous knock-offs. However, hearing you all say that they are normally so cheap, I guess they are ok. I was expecting 50-100 euro for something like that which I wouldn't have been willing to pay (as I said, no older children, so no idea about that kind of thing).

OP posts:

callmemrs · 02/04/2012 13:00

Re: the pencil grip- yes, I assumed she would need one for writing- but surely her parents would pack one if they want her to be able to send a postcard etc. I think checking the arrangements for a booster seat are fair enough (though I would have dealt directly with the parents) but I think phoning to check they've packed other items could be seen as a tad interfering

Original poster

Psammead · 02/04/2012 13:09

Call, if I hadn't have asked if they were bringing them, they wouldn't have brought any of those things.

OP posts:

BiddyPop · 02/04/2012 13:12

We got the trunki version which is also a backpack, for when we were travelling with DD last year - cost to buy was almost the same as renting from car hire co for the 10 days and we have it now for when friends need it etc. It also meant that DD could use it as her own carry-on item of luggage and decide what she wanted to bring in it (we used it as something to carry some toys for the hols, including beach toys). Relatively decent capacity for a child.

The family up the road who usually come with us travel a lot too, and they recently bought 2 inflatable boosters which fit easily into their luggage.

So there are options if your parents want a less-burdensome version. And yes, they are daft not to want to have DN safe.

fhdl34 · 02/04/2012 13:13

When my bro came with his kids from the States, he brought his with him after I asked what he was going to do. I offered to buy 2 cheapy ones but he wanted to bring his because he'd chosen them for their safety.
IMO YANBU

ll31 · 02/04/2012 13:19

yanbu re the booster seat but about the other stuff... surely its down to her whether she wants to bring camera, pencil grip etc - if she's going on holiday perhaps last thing she wants is to fill out holiday diary - idea that he was to be made do it would fill my son with horror.... Me too to be honest

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