to have always wanted two children, but to now be very scared?

[Newmummytobe79]

Not planning on trying for another for a while yet - and I hope we would be as lucky in getting pregnant as the first time - but I'm starting to feel a bit scared by it.

Part of me thinks that we should leave a small age gap (baby is currently 6 months) - but am I thinking that so I can get another pregnancy 'over and done with' as I don't enjoy the weight gain and had a terrible birth resulting in an EMCS.

Part of me thinks we should leave it a few years but then I wonder if I'll want to do it again? I'll be heading well into passing my mid 30's by then and DH will be around over 40.

I struggled with the first 12 weeks - feeling very down and I just don't know if I could cope?

Also - by the sounds of it (compared to friends stories and reading horror stories on here!), our DC is currently(!) a good baby as sleeps at night but can be demanding during the day. Everyone tells me your 2nd child is totally different and I'm scared we'll have a non-sleeper/constant crier!

DH is very keen for us not to have an only one as both of us love our siblings, and I'm quite shocked that I'm thinking like this as I always pictured myself with two, maybe three, children.

Is this a normal thought process? Or were you all really keen to go for DC2?

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Bag of Holly, a friend of my mums had twins when her first DC was 13 months old. She was barely seen for almost a year and even then it was ripping her hair out while still in jim jams at tea time! I hear she found it very hard work until they were older.

In the first few months I felt sort of "No way would I EVER do that again EVER" but within 18 months I had changed my tune! Unfortunately I wasn't able to have anymore though.