to be pissed off at MIL?

[demisemiquaver]

for last few years we've been here for xmas and new year.This year there's stuff on the weekend after easter which we'll be away at my mum's for ....so this year we're here for easter too!! and she's 'charmingly' trying to persuade us to be here for something SHE wants to plan, on the friday after easter, which would take away from that weekend at my mum's
.......like 'how can you resist my invitation' ..like I'm being awkward..Thing is..she always ostentatiously asks after my mum[as if she cared ! she'd be quite happy not to share any of the family events, of which she already gets the lion's share, due to being much much nearer]

Tell her you have already made plans and you can make it another weekend

Say you never leave your bed or the house on Friday 13th :)

Sounds totally like my MIL! YANBU!

I did, but it was all 'oh but that's when so and so can come' smilie smilie I know I have such winning ways'....... even when I pointed out that we're here most of the time anyway , and this was the school holidays so could go away easier than usual, so why not have her thing at easter

good joke hebie! and thanx for empathy london!

'how can you resist my invitation'
Oh, there will be many other celebrations together.

I am looking forward to visiting with my mother so much, we just don't manage to get much time together these days. Actually, dh and I have even thought of looking at properties closer to her. It would be so nice to have Christmas with her..of course you would be welcome to come.

'oh but that's when so and so can come' Shame we can't though,. Oh well too bad, so sad.

(not that I'd ever say any of these things. I would just say "There will plenty of other times" with a smile though.)

I think the direct approach.

"No. We have arranged to be with my mum. I won't hurt her by cancelling. Just like I wouldn't hurt you by cancelling to go to see my mum when I'd already arranged to be with you. We are not going to change our plans"

You need to say it calmly, firmly and without a hint of a smile on your face.

She's being manipulative. Don't change your plans.

thanx soooo much ladies for your support and ideas : might try some of them [if can ungrit teeth]

My dgran used to do this to df. Her best was phoning up the day before we went on holiday to tell us she'd locked herself out so df would have to drive down to let her in. 200 miles. Df pointed out that next door had a spare key. She said "It's 4:00. They're having their tea, I don't like to disturb them."

Df phoned up next door and sorted it. Dgran phoned him back to tell him off for disturbing them. He was one big

If you let them get away with it once, then they'll keep doing it. Stand firm.