to feel despondent because of what a recruitment agent just said to me

[meredeux]

she (very nicely) told me that I have very little chance of getting my career back now that I've had a few years as a SAHM. There was lots of "its a long shot" and "we'll keep you in mind in case anything comes up".

I said i'd be flexible over salary (i.e. no minimum) and would be willing to take a job several steps further down the ladder, but it didn't change anything.

What a waste of an education and all those years working long hours and studying at nights to build up my career.

Lizzylou the rc trying to lower my expectations so I would just take the job. I should imagine in a higher paid role she would try and sell me for that. But maybe she couldn't find anyone else, who knows.

As it happens I like my rc and have used the same one for 12 years. Blinking long time! I will always use her over others as she is good.

But yes there was a bit of wellll you've been out for a long time...

No Trois, you know one agent who is a shark I don't think we've met?

Highly unlikely - I dont like the company of RCs as a rule.

A successful agent will advise a candidate and rewrite their Cv and keep re writing to tweak for any suitable job. For an RC to say 'oi luv, you've been out of the market so long you are unemployable' isn't an agency any sane person would stick with. It smacks of a disaffected employee.

DH is industry specialist in a VERY niche industry for snenior management and the highest biller within the industry. You know why? Because he's a shark - one of the fluffy ones who says 'fish are my friends not my food'.

I just read the OP out in the whole to DH - he said ....change the agency. You are dealing with an underling who doesnt give a toss. Short sighted, blinkered, doesnt undertand the market - returning workers have often enhanced their key skills by non traditional means, plus a hunger and a desire that should be encouraged and nurtured.

Don't give up OP. When I wanted to return to work I had a supercilious, pompous twerp tell me that "six years of doing nothing is very bad for your cv". Despite the fact I pointed out calmly that motherhood and voluntary work is hardly nothing in terms of transferable skills he was horrid.

I pootled on working part-time, doing voluntary stuff, etc and now, 15 years later, am back in a better job than I ever expected to reach.

Have faith in yourself!

My career was in financial services (investment management to be more precise). I had experience across a number of disciplines that are all "hot" now. I know how the industry reacts to people who have been "out" for a while and I knew to expect that I wouldn't be warmly greeted when trying to return.

I went via an agency hoping that they could persuade companies to give me a chance.

Still, it was disappointing today because I can see that the recruitment agent makes her commission from placing candidates and she clearly did not hold out high hopes for me. (Along the way she told me that she doesn't have children "yet". "Just wait", I thought...!)

troisgarcons - your DH sounds fantastic!

Wow, what a crap agent. Fwiw, I'm a very odd shaped peg from a career point of view and am currently on a week long assignment fro Office Angels - my local branch are lovely (I registered about 3 weeks ago, turned down the first assignment due to distance, this is the second one they've offered me in that time)

They get paid to get you working. Keep looking, sign up with all the ones you can, and get your cv on totaljobs, reed etc. If I can do it, you can!

In the 1980's early 90's I was high end City - earning 6+ figures. I had 8 years as a SAHM. I couldn't have gone back to what I did before, I was out of date and couldn't have sustained the travel or the hours.

I took a part-time school hours job in the public sector for 8k. But, I did it with a five year plan, to be professionally qualified within five years and on a managerial rung (I had no professional quals or a degree by the way). After five years I had achieved that, I had taken the professional quals, and after seven years I also had a funded MBA. I was working full time after three years. I now earn more than 40k (not amazing I know) and have a bit of work life balance flexibility and work locally.

In the 8 years I had off, I was a non exec on the local health authority, chairman of the pta, treasurer at my local church. All the things you do as a SAHM can pay off in the context of experience.

Apply to ads - think out of the box a bit and you will get up with what you want. Perhaps not immediately, but it will come.

I don't know what field you are in. but I'd recommend the website www.womenlikeus.org.uk

and I'd recommend volunteering.

I had all this after taking a mere 6 months out with DS1, so it's really more the agent than you.

I tend to view agencies as a necessary evil; being told I'm overpaid for the job I do (I'm really not!) and they probably couldnt find me another job which paid as well was the last conversation I had with a RC which did not endear me to her!

troisgarcons - your DH sounds fantastic!

He is and I tell you why - he got into the game by accident. Being management in his own field - took a nice redundancy package - because an acquaintance offered him a job as an insurance salesman. He did very nicely at that too - but he realised that really was preying on people fears - he was too nice to do that for long - hopped over to recruitment and specialised in his own industry. It is niche. He often gets head hunted back into the industry and he is frequently head hunted by other organisations.

But he is a shark. A toothless old shark..... he knows the game; he knows how to play it. Candidates are his assets; hone, train candidate, take them through mock interviews - and that his jam on the bread and butter of the industry. Find the right candidate - the company will do repeat business - do well for the candidate, when they need to move on, they come back for another job. You have to be a long stay player.

He trains other consultants up to standard. Always the mantra of "be careful of who you shit step on on the way up because sure as hell you'll be working with them on the way down. Make friends, network like hell, socialise - that is why he is successful.

I would mention though - he works with some right bastards I wouldn't trust not to sell my granny for spare body parts!

The hard facts are if you go through an agent you have a price on your head of at least £2k. Most companies will only pay that for a proven recent track record. Don't blame the agent for that sometimes they arent able to say No when she should have just said I dont think we can help you and been honest. She was talking rubbish though ofcourse you can get your career back. I would agre though try temping or apply direct where you can sell your skills yourself.
Goodluck.

Ask friends and acquaintances if they know of available positions.

Often firms pay an employee for a referral that leads to a hire as it cuts out the cost of the recruitment agency.

Also, IME it's easier to find a job if you've got a job even if it's not in the field you want. It'll also boost your ego to land a position and give you something current to put on your CV.

Other posters are right, sign up with multiple agencies, not just one. Interview them rather than the other way round. If you receive negative feedback, move on.

Good luck.

I've been hunting company websites today for job vacancies. there is a temp job i am going to apply for. Its below graduate entry level (and I was at director level when i left) so I should be able to do it. It involves putting numbers into a database - the same type of numbers that I used to calculate on an ad-hoc basis when a specialist was required.

I'm a little worried that this is a bad move because it will redefine me, but then again maybe I will get my confidence back and maybe add some value??

You could try Women Like Us, who specialise in getting women back to work after they've been at home for a while. I think it's mostly part-time work, though.

www.womenlikeus.org.uk/home.aspx

There may be other specialist agencies who could help.

meredeux - personally, if it were a permanent job, I would say don't do it - but as a temp job you could categorise it as a means to get back into the swing and rebuild your network [optimistic]?

stealthsquiggle and hackmum thank you both for your advice. Women like us is a really good business idea. there must be hundreds or thousands of experienced women out there who would love to work part time. So a win-win situation for employer and employee.

Maybe it will mean I can get back into the swing but it won't help my contact book. the people who i used to work with/ for are not even in the same building

Meredeux, are you on Linked in? You may find lots of your old colleagues/contacts on there? Must be lots of leads there. Apologies if you have already done so.

And, I am sorry for going off on one yesterday, just get annoyed by sweeping generalisations. Rec Consultants aren't all bad, honestly.

One thing though, someone down thread suggested putting your CV on jobs boards. I would really warn you against this. Unscrupulous agents just lift CVs off there and plaster them all over the market, without even contacting you.

I decided to change job after maternity leave and one agent from Manpower and one from Marks Sattin told me I would never be employed in my field of work because firms won't pay £x for people who can't travel at a pin drop (read parents). I contacted one of the firms I was interested in, had one interview and was offered the job at £x+

ps. Mumsnet HQ, apologies for naming the companies and understand this may be deleted but I think naming and shaming is important in this case. (Tempted to name the individuals but of course won't).

ps. I used Women Like Us who were WONDERFUL! I had a potential job on the cards with them but couldn't keep my current employer waiting. The consultant at WLU gave me wonderful advice about my future career and thinking about whether my current role would be better in the long run. She was spot on. She was also super when to my shame under the stress of the job hunt I burst into tears on the phone- so unprofessional of me .

On the off chance she's a MNer, the new job is fantastic, promotion on the cards already and it looks like you were so right to urge me not just to think about now, but look to where I'll be in ten years time- thank you

I was actually told by a Rec to Rec (yep, there are recruitment consultants who shark out recruitment consultants) that my days in recruitment were over post mat leave and because I couldn't/wouldn't travel into the city. Luckily the next one knew of a fab firm who were interested in me coming in and setting up a desk in my specialism, working family friendly hours and only 5miles from home.

It may take time, you may have to think creatively, but your skills will be of interest in the market OP.

Having worked with RCs for what was quite a biggie, I didn't rate them much as likeable humans. My faith in them has been restored after DH got a new job after going through one. It took 3 months but he got there.

To the OP: sometimes you just need to get a foot in the door. I employ a wonderful lady in a full-time admin job. She had 7 years as a SAHM after being made redundant about the same time as getting arried and having her DS. I met her because she was our office cleaner (provided by another company - we didn't recruit her for that). She took the cleaning job because it was within walking distance and 'better than nothing'.Turned out she had 16 years office work behind her, 9 as office manager. I got her in pt initially and after a few months had enough funds to allow her to give up cleaning. She's a corner stone of the office and may well go on to greater things when she's ready (she doesn't want the extra responsibility at the mo).
Not really comparable to your situation I know, but you get the idea.

I liked the suggestion up-thread about having a 5-year plan to move up the ladder. It's the first step that's the hardest, but nothing's impossible. Don't let that one agent define how you live the rest of your llife.

I'd say that if you have a skill and experience worth paying for then set up a business yourself. If it was office based stuff you did you could do it as an outsourced home worker, consultant or maternity cover or provide the service on a small scale to SMEs.

In time you could be an employer rather than an employee. It beats me why people think someone else, who has taken a risk and started a business should dilute their profits to take someone on when they won't take a risk and start up on their own.