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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To have reported this bus driver?

64 replies

Duckypoohs · 25/03/2012 03:03

Ok so we were on the bus home this afternoon after a trip to the park. As we were nearing our stop I said to ds1 press the button, this resulted in a minor scrum, with all 3 children trying to press the button at once. The button happened to be pressed 3 times, the bus driver then shouted at us to stop pressing the button. I accept that he was right to do so, he needs to concentrate on the road etc.

A couple of minutes later the only other passenger on the bus, an older lady pressed the button again, bus driver then launches into a rant at us, properly shouting and threatening to ??? (didn't find out what the threat was because I did shout that it wasn't actually us)

Poor Lady looked sheepish and said sorry to us, bus driver muttered something under his breath as we got off.

The bus was very empty and I did feel a bit threatened tbh, I hate any kind of confrontation and tend to either cry or shake.

If you are going to get that irate about children dinging the bell a few times I don't think you are suited to be a bus driver.

Why the fuck am I still thinking about it now? Why the fuck does some random grumpy bus driver shouting at me make me feel so wretched?

OP posts:
OhDoAdmitMrsDeVere · 25/03/2012 11:18

hetcate

methinks you are going to spend a lot of time sorely disapointed at the lack of racking going on Grin

blackeyedsusan · 25/03/2012 11:25

there used to be bus stopping lights on buses... must be 10 years or so ago as I have not been on one for years.

PastGrace · 25/03/2012 11:30

DP and I were on a bus in London (in the City, on a Sunday, so not many people on it) and we pushed the bell before our stop. Bus driver ignored it and didn't stop, so I pressed it once it was apparent he wasn't stopping (he was still just in the bus bay thing) but he still didn't stop. DP then pressed it again before the next stop and he turned round and SCREAMED at us not to keep pressing the button because it was "doing his head in". I resisted the urge to say "it does my head in when you don't do your job properly" and we got off the bus. I have mobility problems and I hope he saw me limping back towards the other bus stop and felt guilty.

TBH I wish I had reported him, but it was early on a Sunday and I gave him the benefit of the doubt that he was just having a bad day and wanted to be at home. Your driver overreacted.

BoffinMum · 25/03/2012 13:10

Why didn't you say to him you had quite reasonably pressed the button again because he had driven past the stop? Hmm

NoOnesGoingToEatYourEyes · 25/03/2012 13:40

Why did you press the bell more than a couple of minutes before your stop?

RuleBritannia · 25/03/2012 13:42

Reading Buses all have a 'Stopping' illuminated notice.

NoOnesGoingToEatYourEyes · 25/03/2012 13:43

My question was to the OP by the way, not to PastGrace.

WorraLiberty · 25/03/2012 13:43

He overreacted

You overreacted

That's about it really

ThisIsNotMyLife · 25/03/2012 13:48

Forget about it and press the button once, yourself in future.

whatsallthefuss · 25/03/2012 13:49

well said worra

PastGrace · 25/03/2012 13:56

Boffin because to do that I would have to had to walk away from the open doors (since he had finally stopped) and engage him in conversation, by which point he would probably have shut the doors again and driven further away.

I don't particularly enjoy shouting down buses, so I just got off.

nizlopi · 25/03/2012 13:57

A few years ago, I got on a bus, and as I was paying I noticed the driver watching a young girl run up the road to get on too. I was still paying as she got to the door, which he quickly closed and then sped off, looking weirdly smug. I automatically said to him 'That wasn't a very nice thing to do'. He told me to stfu and sit down. A few stops later, I was the only person left downstairs on the bus. He stopped the bus and started yelling at me, saying that I was a stupid little bitch (!) and that he'd show me how not nice he could be. He then said that if I ever got on his bus again he'd break my legs.

Being 18 at the time, and a bit naive, I simply waited for him to finish, got off at my stop and then called to complain the next day. They did FUCK ALL.

I wish I'd gone to the police about it tbh, or made more of a fuss, but I was a bit silly back then anyway and just left it. But anyway, bus drivers are dicks and so are the companies that employ them.

WorraLiberty · 25/03/2012 14:08

But anyway, bus drivers are dicks and so are the companies that employ them

Right, so if you got mistreated by say a supermarket worker...that would make them all dicks would it? Hmm

McFluffster · 25/03/2012 14:10

YANBU if he can't control his temper, he shouldn't be working with the public. Hopefully he might learn something from this.

McFluffster · 25/03/2012 14:11

Nizlopi that's horrendous.

fridakahlo · 25/03/2012 14:54

We had a lovely bus driver in Canterbury. He drove the bus that was mostly used by pensioners. We used it as it went from near us to near my dd's nursery. His name was Brian and he was always chatty and friendly.
They are not all bad.

PtCatalyst · 25/03/2012 15:27

I've had a similar experience. On the bus I was on, someone was pressing the button frequently. The place where I get off has three stops in relatively quick sucession - I get off at the second one.
Whoever it was had pressed the button just before the first stop, the bus stopped and no-one got off. I then pressed the button but the driver went right past my stop. Another person then pressed the button and the bus stopped at the third stop. As I was getting off the bus I commented to the driver that he had missed my stop. He then shouted at me that I had been repeatedly pressing the button at the wrong time, and that the button was not pressed at all for the second stop.
I did conclude as I was getting off that he must have been having a bad day, but that didn't really excuse the false accusations...
So in conclusion, I think YANBU - i've been there and it's not nice.

Birdsgottafly · 25/03/2012 15:48

I don't think that drivers should shout or swear, they are at work, after all.

However, they cannot win, in my area most do not ring the bell, but have a go at the driver when the bus doesn't stop, even when there are people standing, so the driver has no other way of knowing that they want to get off.

nizlopi · 25/03/2012 16:13

WorraLiberty

Yes. Yes it would.

HawthornLantern · 25/03/2012 16:29

Something very similar happened to me on the way to work a few years ago. I knew, from months and years using this route, that this particular driver was very grumpy and seemed to enjoy shouting at passengers. He once stormed onto the top deck to complain about a passenger who was somehow impeding his view. I didn't like the guy but I tended to have the view that it's a pretty thankless job on the whole (though some of the other drivers were lovely and seemed to enjoy getting to know their regulars).

But when he did go for me it was because he thought, wrongly, that I was repeatedly ringing the bell at the wrong time - he could see me standing near the door and this was guilt in his eyes. He took it one stage further and when I did leave the bus he decided to carry on shouting and swearing at me as I walked along the road. And I felt attacked and rattled and so I emailed the bus company - there was a link for complaints I think.

I got a very nice apology and an assurance they took this behaviour very seriously. I never saw the driver again. Possibly pure coincidence, but just as possible that my email was the straw that broke the camel's back for a driver who seemed to have barely controlled anger management issues.

So I'm not suggesting that you contact the company to loose the guy his job, but I think companies do have some duty of care to ensure that their drivers are behaving and responding appropriately to normal pressures of the road. Maybe a word in his ear is all it would take.

AMAZINWOMAN · 25/03/2012 17:23

"a minor scrum" is not safe on a moving bus and could have been a distraction to the driver.

RaPaPaPumPumBootyMum · 25/03/2012 18:13

I would email a complaint.

It was not acceptable or professional behaviour on the part of the bus driver.

Surely ringing bells is part of the work environment Hmm

And stop giving the OP a hard time about the "minor scrum". I think children enthusiastically getting involved in wanting to push the bell is pretty unremarkable. I catch buses regularly in London and always see small children wanting to press the bell and some actually doing so more than once.

I really think if this type of thing enrages him he needs to rethink his occupation.

I used to be a nurse and I can assure you I had to deal with much worse behaviour from my customers patients.

It would never have been tolerated for me to rant and rave at them [and nor should it have been, I was in a professional position and was representing my hospital]

Instead I eventually voted with my feet and left the occupation.

Perhaps grumpy and rude bus drivers should do the same.

[And I know there are lots of friendly and professional bus drivers, I meet them every day!]

bobbledunk · 25/03/2012 19:26

What a snivelling little snitch you are. He has probably learnt from experience that if he didn't yell at you, they would likely have continued pressing the button for the rest of the journey.

Grow up.

Lueji · 25/03/2012 19:30

He definitely wasn't a London bus driver.

YANBU

picnicbasketcase · 25/03/2012 19:31
Shock

Blimey.