Not really to understand what people mean by 'feral children'

[bugster]

I've read lots of threads that refer to 'feral children'. Having lived outside the U.K. For 10 years, I'm not quite sure what's meant by this - it seems to be an expression that's recently come into use. My sister in law from England, who was over here a while back, refered to many of the young neighbourhood children who play outside and go in and out of each others' houses as 'feral'. I would have thought this was pretty normal behaviour for young children but 'feral children' seems to have a pretty negative connotation.

What would be your definition of 'feral children'?

bugster yes seriously.
It made local news obviously but then faded as most teenage 'gang' deaths do round here.
This was approx 3 1/2 years ago and there are fresh flowers tied every week on the lampost with a picture of the young lad and a few candles.

The lad responsible wasn't named because of his age but such is the very small community we all knew who it was and (i'm trying not to get angry now) the lad gained a certain amount of kudos for being 'hard'

Oh then we had to put up with months of retalitations and counter retalitations to restore 'honour'

Fucking bonkers time and I am glad I am out of that work situation now.

I dont like the term, very DM.

'Children who are outdoors all day' children could do to be outdoor more.

I get the impression it's a term which is used by some to deride children of the lowest social class, who are pretty badly neglected and probably deserve more empathy.

I think that everyone realises they need help and they are not without empathy. Unfortunately they are not able to give either. The DCs are completely out of control, sadly they are neglected and get no love and support from their families.

they are wild children usually starts in toddlerhood parents dont care what they do if they are climbing hitting wont teach them to sit or how to eat , then it moves on to letting them out playing and not watching them or knowing where they are , then it just gets worse and worse , I feel sorry for these children and i also work with these children and its really sad , these Little ones have no social boundries at all

I have no clue what the answer is.
Without starting a financial/benefit the children I spoke of didn't go without material things. Money for clothes, mobiles, alcohol, weed etc.
They lacked moral guidance for sure. (yes I do know this for a fact after being heavily involved with the kids I spoke of)

Do you take them into care? or is the damage already done?
Everytime anyone spoke to them their response was usually on their terms.

The number of times I was addressed by young people between the age of 11 to 18 as a fat cunt because I didn't open the youth club when they wanted was unbellevable. I mentioned dog shit epsiode, colleagues cars have been vandalised, a member of staffs car was stolen causing as you can imagine imense distress- she never returned to that place of work.

We did try talking to the parents. Once we feared for the kids well being after we left and reported our concerns to SS and another time - when one set fire to the minibus AS WE WERE DRIVING IT- we got told ' well boys wil be boys'
To think I was distraught when I got made redundant

That must have been really hard upahill. All credit to you for trying to engage with them.

tbh I think there are areas in the UK these days where the sight of children playing outside is so rare that any children doing so will be assumed to be feral

I have friends telling me that they are afraid to walk down the street near ours which has council housing because of the feral children- when I ask for particulars it is the playing outside unsupervised they mention

I walk down this street at least twice a day and have never been treated rudely in any way: they move out of your way to let you pass, I'd say they are very definitely please and thank you children

but in a neighbourhood where most children below secondary school age are shepherded to playdates by their parents and never out of sight of an adult, they do stick out, and people do jump to conclusions

tbh I think there are areas in the UK these days where the sight of children playing outside is so rare that any children doing so will be assumed to be feral

absolutely spot on, as a child (this was only the 90's) I had my breakfast went out to play and came back when I was hungry, as did everybody.
I worked at a school and alot of the kids of 'nice families' were kept in all the time, looked very ill all obviously a bit deficient in vitamin D, very un- streetwise. more harm than good.

That isn't feral. That's children living a normal healthy sociable life.

I expect my kids to go out!!I want 2s1 to meet his mates in town, go to Subway for a butty, go bowling etc. I want ds2 to be playing on the football fields and bombing around having fun on his bikes. As long as they are not being a nuisance and offending people I have no problem with those things.

I don't expect them to do all the things I have listed and expierenced in my previous posts!!

I think that, to me, is the difference between feral and ordinary.

Sorry - my post was to the OP. haven't read all the others.

I really dislike the term feral children. They are not feral they are neglected.

That is wholly different from children playing outside, building dens, making a mess.

To me feral children are those who do not have a secure supportive home life with appropriate care and boundaries.

Children should be out and about,playing without adult supervision. These are DCs who are running wild and don't understand the norms of society.

It isn't their fault they don't understand the norms-they are neglected.

The trouble is these children, whether they are tagged with the term feral or not, go on to have children themselves.

on Sunday afternoon I was out walking with my friend and ex colleague from the place I mentioned.
We were chatting, as you do and I was saying do you still see 'a' around what about 'b', how's 'c' getting on?
She then says ' oh do you remember 'n?, He has a child of about two now.
My heart sank
I saw 'n' about three weeks ago lying on a park bench (cliche I know) with some of the towns dropouts shouting ' You fucking skank' or 'I'd fuck you' to young girls that was walking past. Around the bench was empty cans and the like. This lad is either just 18 or had his 18th in the last few months, I can't remember which. He had a drink problem when he was at school and was put in a specilized unit. His mum and her boyfriends are well known in the community for causing trouble when drunk. The cycle of the underclass continues.

There have been many times over the years where I wished I hadn't opted for a social care background (I wasn't a social worker but did face to face work with people from deprieved backgrounds) In many cases people didn't want to change. They didn't want to give up drink, there was nothing I could do then except give them my business card and say call me if you change your mind. There were many many cases of people not wanting to give up benefits and work. Many of these had chaotic lifestyles which I found so hard to comprehend and had to try and support. First I was shocked. I would wonder why people would want to have their house filled with dodgy people all day, every day. I wondered why they weren't bothered if their kids didn't go to school but I ended up being hardend to it. Looking back it makes me feel sad that I ended up like that. But I can't change the world and people have to want to change.

This isnt really about letting children out toplay though,
these little kids are allowed out the door to wander from very young because the parents cant be bothered to look after them they often come from chaotic homes and families , and im not talking about running about silly to get to school in the morning chaotic ,

I let my children out to play I knew where they were especially when they were young , often when dd1 was 5/6 out playing in the garden or in the square there would be strange kids from other side of town often 4/5 just wandering and these Littlies were often at my door looking to use the toilet or asking to come into the house to play with X , somebody would usually come looking for them when it was dark , then they would get a wallop for being away from home

Yes cory and Hoebag I think that's the thing -it's so rare for kids to play outside unsupervised, the ones that do get this label 'feral', I guess that's why my sister in law applied it to our neighbourhood kids but they are just normal kids really. I think it's important they play outside unsupervised and can be a bit spontNeous with who they want to play with without being shepherded to play dates, having all the details of their lives planned out for them by their parents.

Of course they need to be dressed properly and to know the boundaries of where they are allowed to go etc, but there is no reason why they should all end up as criminals! That just comes from their parents' attitudes and examples I guess. The cycle described by upahill is really sad - how to help people break out of it? So unfortunate that people like that boy have children.

bugster it is important for children toplay outside my own children were free range my DDs are older and i know some parents are a bit EEEK at the thought of their DC going out alone , but feral children (isnt it a horrible phrase [sad ) are a bit different imo

Letting DCs out to play unsupervised is what every parent should be doing! It has nothing to do with being feral!

I didn't say it does, exotic: only that it does in the perception of some people, in certain neighbourhoods. Which is a great pity. Especially as there is a risk that the children themselves can pick up on those vibes.

I lived for a short while in an area of South London where there were mostly council flats. The one corner shop served most of the buildings. I went in one day after work, to get milk and there at the cash desk were two small children (around 7 or 8). Their hair was matted, their clothes filthy, their hands and faces looked like they had not been washed, ever. They were buying cigarettes for their parent(?). It was like something out of a Dickens novel, but far worse as it was real and in the 1990s. In my mind, this is feral children.

I had some friends once who had a baby boy and named the little thing Feral. As his actual name. Meaning wild.
A bit of an invitation for disaster. Don't know how he turned out, we all lost touch, he would be 22 now.

I'd say children that do not believe or understand that the rules of law or civilised society are relevant to them or need to be obeyed. They usually learn this attitude from their parents.