AIBU to be really shaken by so many of my old teachers being arrested/in prison

[5dcsinneedofacleaner]

my dh (who was at the same school as me - we left 13 years ago) thinks i am being odd. in the last couple of years 4 teachers I had have been arrested 3 found guilty one awaiting court case. All crimes were sexual - three against children one against an adult none linked so 4 people in a small group really seperatley commiting these crimes.
I should say i was never in any way aware of this at school indeed each time it was a total shock to hear what had happened. I am starting to feel really on edge about it - I have 5 dcs in school in the same area when they are older chances are they will start at the same school and I am really on edge about it and even feel like i dont want to send them!
am I being ridiculous and oversensitive as dh thinks or is it normal to feel this way?!

I totally understand you being shocked about this. I would be too. Its bound to shake your sense of what is okay as as far as you knew there were no problems with these teachers.

But I don't think what happened over 13 years ago has any impact on what the school is like now. Its a long long time ago. When your dcs are due to go to secondary you can always go and visit and talk to the HT about your worries. But really, try not to think about this at the moment.

But as your DP isn't understanding about this, is there someone else in rl you can talk to about how you are feeling?

The OP said it was in the last couple of years lesley

i wouldnt be sending my kids there, YADNBU, i am astonished that your DH thinks you are being odd

Good grief! Is this a state secondary OP?

Was it? Sorry I thought the court cases were in the last couple of years but the offences happened when the OP was at school over 13 years ago. Op can you clarify how long ago the offences happened?

yes its a state secondary, the first was arrested around 4 years I think ago but we only heard about it 2 years ago (when we moved back to the area) the others have been since then with the most recent being in the last few weeks. The actual crimes have been spread over 20+ years so the arrest was recent but the crime old if you see what i mean. My dh is one of those people who always thinks things like that only happen to other people - he is so relaxed about things sometimes its just infuriating!. Also to be fair my children are much too young to go there atm - will be a few years - the oldest is only 7! but still its making me look over my shoulder in a way i have never felt i need to before :(

sorry lesley the oldest crime was 20+ years ago the most recent occuring now.

all of the teachers were teachers there when we were there - one was head of year, another our science teacher for example.

I think feeling like that is natural. It brings home to you that the world can be a bad place. I know we knwo that logically, but it is different when you have proof of that.

In terms of your DCs, wait till they are nearer secondary school age and then you can look at this issue.

I can understand your shock - many years after I left primary school, a much beloved PE teacher was found guilty of indecent behaviour towards children, possessing images etc and it really stunned and upset me. He was responsible for all sports in the school, running gym clubs etc and we were all really fond of him - to discover he had secretly been a paedophile was pretty devastating, even years later (and none of us at the time being any the wiser AFAIK)
As lesley says, I think you will have to evaluate the situation when it comes time for you own DC to attend the school.

I find it pretty scary.

A man who lives/d up our road was tried and found guilty a few weeks ago for similar crimes. The offences happened years and years ago, he went on to have a pretty impressive non teaching career. We knew him some years ago where he held a mentor type role but for adults. A couple of years ago we happened to move into his road though he worked mainly abroad. I find it dscomforting that a person we knew, though not well, who would stop and chat in the street, as after us etc had such a horrible past.

YANBU

Did anyone have any idea that this was going on? Did the teachers seem to be nice 'normal' people?

In the last year, two fathers from my DD's primary school have been charged with making and downloading sexually explicit pictures of children. It does make us feel strange, that it is happening so close to home.

YANBU.

I think we all like to think that we have 'radar' and are able to spot danger on the horizon, and protect ourselves. To KNOW that you had no inkling that someone you came into regular contact with could have presented a danger to you - well, as well as being shaken by their behaviour, you are shaken by the fact that you didn't see it coming. And if you didn't see it with them, what other dangers are lurking around you right now, possibly just waiting to pounce? Your belief that you can look out for yourself is challenged. That's why you are shaken (IMO).

Your DH thinks you are being "ridiculous and oversensitive". I'm inclined to think he is rather unimaginative; unable to register the 'what if' scenarios that our self-preservation instincts play out in the back of our minds.

I'm amazed that more of my secondary teachers are not behind bars.