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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To let 9year old dd walk a mile through woods every day on her own to get to school?

85 replies

Ouluckyduck · 19/03/2012 23:11

this question is currently being discussed on a German forum. Huss what the responses are.

OP posts:
maybenow · 21/03/2012 20:24

i trail run so i've tried most of the woods around here on my own. there are woods where there are dog walkers and toddlers and mums and runners and there are woods where there are drug deals and teenagers setting fire to things.. it's important to tell the difference by knowing the area.

but.. if it was a nice wood where i'd never seen any undesirable behaviour and if my child was not having any bullying issues themselves with classmates etc then i would allow it. though obviously not in the pitch dark so actually it wouldn't be possible for at least half the school year. i would be most worried about kids high-jinks than anything more sinister..

JuicyShops · 21/03/2012 20:30

i agree with the germans!!!

Geranium3 · 21/03/2012 20:32

No i wouldn't allow this, I would feel uneasy doing it by myself as an adult. We have german friends who have no qualms about their chidren wandering around their village on their own and the children seem very confident and happy.

RandomMess · 21/03/2012 20:33

I'm with the Germans too inspite of the rare abductions that have happened.

ZuzuBailey · 21/03/2012 20:56

I wouldn't do it myself and wouldn't allow a child to either.

I did play in the woods with friends when I was 6/7 years old though.

AllPastYears · 21/03/2012 20:57

I would be less anxious about paedos and abductions than bullying, taunting, even physical attacks by my children's peers. Sadly that is all too common Sad.

DarrowbyEightFive · 21/03/2012 21:17

I've lived in Germany for 20 years and my DC have lived here all their lives.

In rural Germany and small towns, not only is it common for DC to go to school by themselves from 6 onwards (year 1), but it is seen as an affront to civilisation if parents try to take them. I was on a forum once where this was discussed and one father called it an 'Unding' (absurd, preposterous) that children should NOT walk to school by themselves.

Now, we live in a big bad city, and there aren't many parents who let their kids go all alone at 6 (but more out of fear of traffic than anything else). I do think some of the rural parents are living some sort of 1950s dream and haven't woken up to very different road conditions nowadays. I asked a traffic policeman once here when he would recommend children going by themselves and he said, depending on the child's maturity in traffic, about 9. This fits in with our experience, and a lot of other parents here. DD2 started taking the bus by herself recently and she's 9. When DD1 was 11 she used to take DD2 (then 7) home on the bus as well. However, I'm at home when they get there, so I can get to them very quickly if there's a problem (bus doesn't turn up etc) and they phone me.

Re the wood carving knife: DD2's class used to do this as an activity when they were 6 and DD2 was given a wood carver for her 7th birthday from some friends. It comes with its own sheath and DD knows to be careful and to carve away from her body. It's not a problem. I'd rather her do that than spend hours each day on a DS2.

By comparison, certain children in the UK come across as neurotically overprotected in some respects, but horribly exposed to the negative side of adulthood on the other. There seems to be very little encouragement to develop responsible behaviour, but greater tolerance for watching unsuitable TV programmes/playing adult computer games or drinking alcohol early on. Admittedly it's difficult for me to form a proper view, as a lot of what I know about British DC comes from here!

NowThenWreck · 21/03/2012 21:22

I would agree with the traffic policeman darrow.
My greatest fear for my child is always traffic, and the insane way people drive around here.
I often think that people who scoff at nervous parents for not letting their kids walk to school alone from 6 are probably a bit in denial about the sheer numbers of accidents involving cars and stray kids.

I had a penknife from around age 8 I think and would whittle sticks for hours. (no CBBC in them days!) so I have no problem with the knife thing, as long as they are taught how to use it properly.

TheBigJessie · 21/03/2012 23:22

So, the OP never came back? And I was actually being over-cynical? Dammit.

cory · 22/03/2012 09:19

I don't hold with wolf-carving.

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