DS...(again) ....backstory - he is 20, he has special needs (aspergers, dyspraxia and dyslexia) but is intelligent - he has been very deceitful with regard to money/debts and has cut both myself and DH out of his finances, despite the fact i am now getting debtors letters for him. We have offered to help him sort it but he is secretive and refuses to discuss it. We have referred him to social services but no word from them yet.
He is going to uni full time in Sept (if he gets his arse into gear and applies for student finance....another bug bear - he leaves it to the very last minute) and is currently going to uni part time, and working from home part time, still living at home
Last time he asked for money to get to get to uni i gave him it only to discover that he also took money out on his overdraft, incurring £70 worth of bank fees, and still kept the money i gave him, without ever giving me it back.
He has just asked for money to get to uni tomorrow. He lost his bank card. He could have gone on Friday to get money out but he forgot (he is genuinely very forgetful) He has asked us to keep his bank card anyway when it comes to stop him spending, and he handed over a credit card that we didnt know he had, as he had also run that up to its limit.
He says if i dont give him some money for tomorrow he will fail his course and has a group project with people relying on him to get there
due to his dishonesty, DH has said not to give it to him. i havent. but i dont want him to fail his course either - i want him to go to uni in Sept because, quite frankly, i have had enough and need a break. He has asked for his credit card back, we said no.
he should have gone on Friday to the bank to get his money out, he didnt, he spends most days in bed as he stays up all night (albeit often working from home - he is a nocturnal aspie...)
AIBU to not give him the money? its only a tenner....im torn.