To expect at least one phone call from PIL?

[ScoobieDooo]

My elderly PIL are not the most proactive at keeping in touch (very rare for them to ring us) and we do all the visiting as they are unable to drive long distances. I was recently in hospital and DH rang them and let them know. Since then, PIL have not made a single call to ask after me or give a little moral support to their DS who has been running round like a blue a*d fly looking after 2 DC, working, cooking, visiting hostpital, ... AIBU to think they should be bothered to call?

Neither sets of our parents bother to call except on birthdays or at Xmas so we are due a call next week!

If you need help why does your dh not ring and ask? Maybe they've not realised how bad it is?

YABU.

As you have said, they are elderly and they simply don't do this. They are unlikely to change now, and if you expect them to you are going to bring yourself frustration.

(And then there's the possibility of subtle hearing loss, which may mae phone calls a real trial).

Well, it would be nice if they phoned to see how he & you are getting on, but I think a lot of older people wait to be told stuff rather than ask.

"No news is good news".

Perhaps they don't like you. My first mother in law would have visited every day to see if I was dead yet if I'd been in hospital.

But even if they don´t care about OP, you would think that they would about their son.

my mother is exactly the same, even before she became ill. yet if you didn't send a card for practically any occasion she gave me loads of grief. its just the way they are. i expect we will be deemed odd when we are old

I'm with Edith, they won't change now.
Like everyone else said, it's common (and pretty much standard for everyone I know over 70 tbh).

I would just try not to let it upset you. You've got too much to deal with already.
Hope you're feeling better now OP.