To give in and have a break overnight? (Sorry bit long)

[Everton4me]

From 4 months pregnant I set up my own business as my hours had been cut at work. I worked hard at my business and made up the shortfall in £ so I could be off with DS and have enough money for all the things we needed for him. There was extra pressure as I am the main breadwinner. I didn't have great health whilst pregnant (gestational diabetes, pre-eclampsia towards the end and insomnia). Had DS by emergency CS.

I continued to work on my business whilst on ML (when baby asleep) to save up to get a bigger car (nearly did back in trying to fit pram in back of my little car).

Then I was told I was at risk of redundancy and so had been applying for jobs (own business not yet big enough to sustain me full time). Finally got one - yeah :)

DS is now 6 mths old and I have done every night feed (I estimate over 250 - sometimes up twice in the night), as my DH has epilepsy and interrupted sleep puts him at risk of having a seizure due to tiredness and I have tried to protect him from this by letting him have good sleeps. He only just got driving licence back 6mths ago and recently had another seizure.

But now DS is 6mths old I am well and truly whacked. My mum comes round most days to help out and she looks after DS of a morning while I go back to bed and of a weekend DH does, but it still doesn't make up for an interrupted night sleep. DS is still waking at 3-4am mostly (sometimes get a 5am).

Am I being selfish to consider taking up Mum's offer to mind DS overnight for one night. He loves her to bits and he is very happy in her company. I can't help thinking that he's still only small. When did everyone else let baby stay out overnight?

Crikey no! You are not BU. Take the offer, grab it with both hands then grab the nearest pillow and sleep!

Are you mad, woman?! You've done every getty-up for 6 months and you need us to give you permission to let your mum help you by babysitting for the night?! Take her hand off! Ask if she can do it this weekend!

My mum had DS overnight at 8 weeks, and since then has had him once a month, last Friday of the month, and one extra night when DH and I were going to a gig. It does us a world of good, and my DPs really enjoy having DS overnight!

YANBU. A mate of mine was struggling like you are and I used to take her baby one night a week overnight to give her a chance to catch up on her sleep. I think he was about 5 mths old when I started doing it.

your ds isn't going to remember this - only you will.

One night of uninterrupted sleep will make all the difference to you.

Go for it.

My sister had DS for two nights when he was 8weeks old so we could go to a wedding.

If my children had children, I would LOVE to have them overnight. Be nice to your mum and let her have the baby overnight! Then sleep for twelve hours straight.

Fantastic you're running your own business. Can you tell us what you're doing?

My Ds started having sleepovers and his grandmas very young.He is 5 now and just LOVES going to grandmas on a saturday night.It is something they BOTH enjoy. They are close.If your mum is up for it then go ahead and get some sleep! You all stand to gain.

go for it, its for his benefit too, you'll be all the more chilled to give him extra attention if youre not so sleep deprived.

Please do it. My DH won't allow me to do this with my parents and it makes me want to divorce him!!
Plus your Mum will probably be chuffed at being such an integral part of your DSS's life.

You should definitely have a night off you sound like you really deserve it! My mum used to take my son overnight when he was a baby and it is good to recharge your batteries again.

Do it but just hope your body clock hasn't got used to it I was shattered from dp's alarm waking me up at 5 and was looking forward to him working away, now I wake up at 5 every morning!

My ds is 2.3 and hasn't left me for more than an hour but am Lucky he's only had a couple of bad nights when poorly.

you would be selfish not to let someone help you - it would be selfish to your baby not to accept help and be a happy mum that is not knackered.

You don't earn a big medal for being the tierdest mum on the plant you know

Do it - the world will seem a little brighter after you've had a nice sleep and like you said, your DS and your DM get on brilliantly. My mum did this with DS2 - we had about 10 hours of uninterrupted sleep and it was glorious!

it's one night. your ds will be fine. you will feel better and more able to deal with things. besides it sounds as if you're overdue a rest. how kind of your mum to offer.

If it makes you feel better then consider it a favour for your mum. Bet she'd love having him for the night.

Never refuse any offers of help. It'll do you the world of good.

YANBU!! Grab the offer and run with it.

Your Mum will love to have him and you'll feel so much better with some sleep.

Go for it - it's not giving in. Try and make it a regular thing!

I had the same issue with my dh. It is enormously tiring and also, living with someone with epilepsy means you probably are under near constant low level stress - due to that alone I mean. I describe it as being on permanent amber alert. I am trying to choose words carefully, as of course being the person with epilepsy is not easy or pleasant at all, but the partner/carer definitely is deeply affected too.

Your mum has offered, and it sounds as if she's active and well enough to care for your ds - so let her. It won't feel like long before your ds is begging to go to granny's for a sleepover.

If you are comfortable with your Mum having him and she is comfortable having him then there is no reason not to. Get some sleep then remind me what sleep is like .

I would do it, but a warning - I recently had my first full night in 10 months while dp had dd in another room, and I woke up every few hours when I normally would to settle her.

Hope you sleep though!

Bloody Hell woman, grab the offer with both hands, it's not as if your LO doesn't know your Mum and isn't happy with him.

When my eldest DN was even younger than your LO my DSis was poorly he was a colicky up all night baby, DBIL was a long distance driver and had used all his leave (this was before Pat Leave)and clearly couldn't risk driving tired.

For about 2months I had him overnight for 2/3 nights to give them a rest. He doesn't remember a bit of it but we still have a really close relationship. He's in his 20s now!

Do it have a good night sleep ( chances are your DHs sleep is being disturbed too even if he doesn't wake up fully each time you get up).

Good god - after doing all the nights with DD so that DP was able to function in his full-on fiddly techy IT job for almost two years (she was a nightmare).....
Get in, woman!

I had two hours of catch-up sleep every morning that meant I just about survived. The chance of a night off was an alien luxury (although, to be fair, she was EBF for six months and still fed through the night for ages after that).

I will never forget the time DP woke me up to ask where DS' LONG sleeved shirts were, though.....

Thanks for the comments everyone. I've decided to go for it and booked DS in for an overnight stay at Hotel Grandparents! badpoet you are spot on and ImperialBlether, not sure if I can say what my business is on this thread - don't want to get flamed. Will see if appropriate thread in employment...