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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

to be pissed off with this "you owe me one" comment?

9 replies

GreatBallsOfFluff · 12/03/2012 14:59

Long story short, got a call at work today to say DD was ill could I come and pick her up. Tried calling exP as he is in the same town as her school to see if he could get her (I work 12 miles away). He was at work (still in same town) but could pick her up at 2 when he finishes. Ring school to ask if that's ok, they say if someone could get there sooner it would be good (she wasn't vomitting). Ring ex to see if he could (was about 12.45) he said he couldn't leave work. So I rush off to pick her up.

Then try and make arrangements for tomorrow. Ask ex if he is working tomorrow to which he says he's working nights tomorrow (he's a care home worker) so has to sleep in the afternoon. I say can he have her in the morning then and I'll have to take afternoon as either holiday or unpaid leave. He makes this big fuss about having to go into another town to pay some money into an account for a bill which must be paid. I offer to do it for him as in my eyes work would prefer for me to be 5 mins late and in rather than not at all (slightly short staffed at the moment). He still makes a big fuss about it but finally ends up agreeing, ending with "you owe me one".

WTF??? It's his child too. Sorry about this garbled OP, but am still reeling at the events of the day an ex's attitude.

OP posts:
scrablet · 12/03/2012 15:08

Sorry have no 'advice' but, how rotten for you and I would be totally wound up by this too. Write it down for him as you told it here, what does he say??
(twat)...him, not you btw

GreatBallsOfFluff · 12/03/2012 15:14

To be honest scrablet I think even if I did show him this it wouldn't make the blindest bit of difference. His selfish behaviour was one of the reasons we broke up and you would think I would be used to it 6 years later but he still never ceases to amaze me. Glad I am not being too sensitive or wound up about it all. Unfortunately I am very busy at work and it is just stressing me out on top of everything thinking about what I will be going back to as well.

OP posts:
PleaseChooseAnotherNN · 12/03/2012 15:19

YANBU

My ex is very much like this, always doing me a favour if he has the kids...

Your DD has two parents, it is easier for him to have her, there shouldn't be a problem!

MissKeithLemon · 12/03/2012 15:25

YANBU - it winds me up no end when they say shit like this. You need to talk to him when there are no immediate emergencies; maybe offer him a coffee next time he picks dd up and spit in it and discuss it with him then. He may be too thick to realise the way it comes out when he says it??

Voidka · 12/03/2012 15:37

My DH is like this - sometimes I wonder why he isnt my Ex!

peugotgringo · 12/03/2012 15:38

YANBU, he sounds an eejit!

WorraLiberty · 12/03/2012 15:49

YANBU unless you're the sort of parent who is totally inflexible about contact and refuses to accommodate any changes at all on his part.

If you were like that then I'd say I could at least see where he's coming from as his 'You owe me one' comment would probably be a way of drawing to your attention that things crop up from time to time, beyond our control.

GreatBallsOfFluff · 12/03/2012 16:11

Thanks everyone as DD is asleep just had a lovely chill out bath with bubbles Smile

No worra not inflexible with contact he has DD one night a fortnight which fits with his work. Recently he had to work extra - no problem just when he could have her next. I think that's why I'm even more knocked about it as I thought we had finally got to a point where we worked as a team (he would have DD during holidays if he could to save CM fees etc)

OP posts:
mrscoleridge · 12/03/2012 16:29

I hate this sort of stuff-like men calling looking after their own children 'babysitting' grrr

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