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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to think that schools have this rule for a reason?

21 replies

ZonkedOut · 09/03/2012 18:53

Last Friday I was at a baby and toddler group, one lady there usually takes a small toddler, but that time had her older brother too. I mentioned I hadn't seen him for a while, she said that he was off school (he is 4). She went on to explain that he was sick (as in vomited) the day before, school had sent him home and refused to let him go back to school the day after, even though he was better - they have a rule about it. So she took him to a baby and toddler group instead.

I was a bit Hmm at the time, but didn't say anything, I don't know her that well.

However, this week, DD1 has had a D&V bug for most of the week, she seems to be getting over it now, fortunately. It's something she could have picked up anyway, not actually likely to be from the boy, but after 4 days of worry and cleaning up sick and diarrhea, I am getting more and more irritated that someone knowingly took a child that had been ill to a group where small babies and toddlers could have caught the bug. One child can have the same bug much milder than another.

So AIBU to think schools have a 24 or 48 rule for a reason, (the doctor told me to keep DD away from other kids until she was 48 hours symptom free). The boy shouldn't have been taken to that group. And AIBU to regret not saying anything at the time.

Or am I biased due to days of DD being ill?

OP posts:
Nanny0gg · 09/03/2012 18:55

The rule is there for a reason and she was very U for bringing her older child.

exoticfruits · 09/03/2012 18:56

He shouldn't have been there but I can see you not wanting to say so.

AmberLeaf · 09/03/2012 18:57

YANBU

Some parents are a bit stupid over things like this.

Pisses me right off.

Its one thing going to the shops because you have no choice but to go to a P&T group is just stupid.

Pseudo341 · 09/03/2012 18:57

YANBU, drives me nuts when I keep cancelling arrangements to keep DD home from nursery every time she has a tummy upset which half the time is down to her reflux anyway and half the time is something she's clearly caught from nursery. Some people are very inconsiderate. Though maybe I'm being biased as I've now caught the latest bug off DD so am feeling crap and can't keep any solids in my stomach at the moment.

items · 09/03/2012 18:57

Completely agree with the 2 day rule. Whilst our children may look healthy, statistics have shown the most contagious is the first 48hrs when getting sick the last 48hrs when getting better. Whilst not always convenient it absolutely makes sense and whilst I, on many occasions, have had the vomit child on a Sunday yet looked fine on the Monday, i knew it was the right thing to keep them home.

GavisconJunkie · 09/03/2012 18:58

Our toddler grouP has the 48 hr policy so she would've been booted!

YANBU

mosschops30 · 09/03/2012 18:58

YANBU lots of patents do this at school.
It should be 48 hours symptom free (hospital rules too)

(i learnt this the hard way after having d&v then going to london 24 hours later eating nandos and drinking, and getting my d&v all over again.
Its not just for others thst little boy should have had time to recover)

NanaASH · 09/03/2012 19:00

Maybe the toddler group shuold have the same rule

Kennyp · 09/03/2012 19:00

The school where i work is extremely strict in the 48 hour rule. Usually its the child who tells us that he/she has got diahorrea or was sick before school. The parents often send them in and hope the child wont say anything.

They are told by the office "see you on friday" as in "do not come anywhere near the school until friday". Its the staff who get the bug too invariably.

Floggingmolly · 09/03/2012 19:02

He wasn't allowed in school, and she couldn't see that this meant he would be equally infectious to the toddler group? She was either incredibly thick or incredibly selfish and I wouldn't have hesitated in raising with the group leader.

Boston2Step · 09/03/2012 19:02

Our secondary school doesn't even have this rule!

NoOnesGoingToEatYourEyes · 09/03/2012 19:04

Our group has the 48 hour rule and for older siblings they say if they are too sick for school they are too sick for the group.

KLou111 · 09/03/2012 19:15

YANBU, way out if order, I'd have left!! Way out of order!

KalSkirata · 09/03/2012 19:20

yanbu. She could have infected a child with a poor immune system.

kumquatsarethelonelyfruit · 09/03/2012 19:27

YANBU - also vomiting/sickness bugs are serious if a child has epilepsy and cannot keep down their meds. Some people are, sadly, very selfish.

slowburner · 09/03/2012 19:31

I'd would be fuming. YANBU she is a fecking idiot. Can you tell her next week or ask the group leader to enforce it? Babies and toddlers are vulnerable to dehydration.

Our nursery is 24 hours since last sign of illness, I'm wondering if they should make it 48, DD always gets D&V after one of the parties and I swear it's because parents send their kids who don't want to miss out but are still infectious.

CremeEggThief · 09/03/2012 19:40

YANBU, it was very selfish of the woman and I know it's not the main point, but how much fun did a 4 year old who had been sick the day before have at a toddler group anyway? Far too many people flout this rule and are back in action way too soon. In fact, in America they recommend ideally staying home for 3 days or 72 hours after the last bout of sickness and/or diarrhoea. 48 hours should be the absolute minimum, but how many of us always stick to the rule?

Original poster
ZonkedOut · 09/03/2012 20:00

The little boy was running around having fun, he didn't seem still ill at all. Apparently he was only sick the once. He might have been fine for all I know, but she didn't know that.

Anyway, I'm glad it's not just me. I've been mulling this over through the week and thinking that if I'm ever tempted to break the 48 hour rule with my DDs, then hopefully I'll remember this week and not risk inflicting this misery on other children.

OP posts:
Scholes34 · 09/03/2012 21:55

YA mostly NBU, but it could have been something other than a bug that had made her son throw up. I've certainly had children throw up in the past through a combination of too much giddiness and party food, for example.

I would keep my DCs off school for the 48 hours where it's more likely a bug and my DS1 still talks fondly of the great day we once had where he was fully recovered but couldn't go to school, so we had a lovely trip out to the countryside for a long walk on our own without the other DCs.

minimisschief · 09/03/2012 22:50

what difference would it make, both her and the toddler were exposed to. so her bringing the child is irrelevent. what you actually want is them all to quarantine themselves for 2 days.

Birdsgottafly · 09/03/2012 22:54

YANBU. Having worked across socal care for nearly 30 years, i can say that the 48 hour rule has done a lot for infection control.

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