to volunteer for redundancy at age 39?

[mellowdramatic]

I am extremely stressed at work. I have a key post and a boss who really appreciates me but because I can churn out a lot of work i'm definitely put on. I don't get the work done by being particularly good - I just carry on working (about 50 hours a week at the mo) to make sure I get it done. Xh left after he had affair 3 years ago so I'm divorced and main carer of 9yo and 6yo, so it's very very hard.

It's a big organisation which is restructuring so i think the "big" bosses would let me go, thinking someone else from a downsizing department could do my job.

My reasons for wanting to finish...
The stress at times makes me feel ill
I want to have more quality time with my kids as they're growing v fast
If I stay where I am i'll probably end up there for the next 20 years

The downsides...
I'm unlikely to walk into anything else on the same money - I have 3 good A levels but they're 20 years old and there's lots of people out there with degrees etc. I don't have professional qualifications.
Will i cope if i can't get a new job? Can I survive on benefits?
I'll miss the company - I'm quite shy and don't have a huge network of friends
The job is a good one - it gives me self esteem

Anyone been there? I've got to make a decision quickly if I want to apply for redundancy, within the next few days. Would be good to hear of anyone that's done it and survived!

Don't do it!

There are literally no jobs out there. You'd be crazy to give up a job that is paid a reasonable amount, particularly when you have young children.

It's ridiculous and wrong that you should be working for 50 hours per week. Does everyone do that? Do you realise it's down to poor management (the people) that you are being asked to do that? They should be paying for 1.5 people, not just you.

You need to speak to your manager and your personnel officer together. You need to explain the workload you have and the stress you are under. Tell them that if you leave, nobody else will work as hard. Remind them that you are falling about because of the stress you are under and that if you leave you could sue them for constructive dismissal.

Try to find something for yourself in your daily life. I know it must be hard if not impossible with young children. Does your ex ever have them overnight? What would you like to do in your spare time?

I was made redundant at 39. Not my choice though. Have been unable to get another job at anything like the same money. Used the redundancy to re-train, but fitting in the coursework round the kids is MUCH harder than the job was. And there is no guarantee I will get a job in the new field, as I am now in my 40's and competing against new graduates.
I really miss the feeling of being a working person. I wouldn't do it voluntarily unless you have a sound plan of how to go from there. If there's any chance of ending up on benefits, it's not the route to take.
Sorry to be pessimistic, but if you have been in the same job for a while it's easy to forget that it can be grim out there, especially in today's market.

You need to lean to say "No". Very politely but very firmly when you're asked to take on more work than you can reasonably manage.

Thanks. I think I have perhaps a false sense of confidence that I could go to an agency and get something temporarily. From what you've said I need to do that first then give up the job!

I've never been a "no" person. I haven't really told you the half of how bad it is but deep down I blame myself for not being good enough so I just keep trying harder to prove myself. Its a trait I see in quite a few women I work with!

Depends if you think you can keep going until your children are old enough to be more self sufficient.

This isn't the economic climate to be thinking about redundancy without a 'plan B'.

That said, your mental health (re stress) is more important then a job. However, stress can also manifest under financial pressure.

Try this: www.direct.gov.uk/en/MoneyTaxAndBenefits/TaxCredits/Paymentsandentitlement/entitlement/DG_181270

It will show you what you are entitled to HOWEVER your children ar of an age where the govt will avoid you being at home full time and find you PT work if possible.

Dont go without a job offer on thr table. You'd be mad to give a table job up IMO (especially, I you get our slf esteem from it)

I know I did it, don't be as stupid as me

*stable obv. table job a bi diff....

I think you'd be mad to give up a job at this time - what you need to do is change the job role as you are doing it at the moment. Your employers owe you a duty of care. Go and see a suitable manager and say that you've been taking on more and more and it's now got to the stage where it seems to be expected of you and you've ended up taking hours of work home. Tell themm it's not doing your health and wellbeing any good, and that, from next week, you have made a decision that you are going to only work the hours you are being paid to work. (May add in an exception if, in your line of work, there is good reason to on the odd occasion).

I took redundancy at 52 and got another job for practically the same salary straight away - in a difficult field too. So it can be done. I know I was lucky though and I could have managed without a job if this one hadn't come up.
Look for another job OP unless the redundancy payout is really good and you can survive on it.

Thanks for your comments. I think it's the loss of my (already fairly low) self esteem that's the biggest worry about being unemployed. The redundancy payment would be good but I'm sure wouldn't last long.

I just need to find a way to spend more time with the kids but it's easier said than done.

I wouldn't. I think right now, you are probably in a 'the grass is greener' mindset about the redundancy, but what's to say you get a job (which you would be very lucky to do in this climate) for less money but with the same pressures and stress?

Maybe you should consider taking a holiday or speaking to your line manager/HR about your workload.

BFG have got year end coming up which is going to be nightmare of nightmares. Have to submit tax returns with very little experience - and as anyone who has ever dealt with the tax office knows, they are very unhelpful/unsympathetic if you're not 100% sure of things.

They wouldn't let me finish work before year end anyway so I will have to do it - if I didn't it would fall on some other poor soul on the team. One guy has just gone off sick with a "cold" which is putting extra pressure on everyone else. But it's been one thing after another for over a year now, and there's quite a few more challenges on the horizon. I work in public sector - resources have been cut, workload has increased.

Have they actually offered you redundancy, and if so do you know exactly how much you'd receive?

Are they asking for voluntary redundancies or do they want to only make specific staff redundant? I know it's meant to be the post that goes not the person, but this economic climate is proving to be a great way of getting rid of unpopular people via a quick restructure. so they might not want to pay you to leave when they'll have to retrain the redeployed person to do your job.

If they haven't offered and you make it known that you want to go, you would be putting yourself in a vulnerable position.

I agree with what lots of other people - don't do anything until you find another job.

They're offering general redunancy - suitable people whose jobs are redundant but who don't want to leave can take your job so that you can leave.

Trouble is the workload isn't decreasing, in fact it's increasing with the new initiatives/regulations etc the coalition are introducing. Every time someone leaves the pressure on everyone else is increasing.

I'm pretty confident my direct line manager would feel she couldn't do without me, but her bosses don't seem to care any more. They just want the easiest way to make cuts cuts and more cuts. Lots of really capable experienced people have been allowed to go - again putting pressure on those left. And lots of big "efficiency" projects with ridiculously short deadlines. I find it very worrying as we provide some key services to vulnerable people - although I'm not directly involved in that side.

First and main point - there are always jobs out there. People join and leave employers all the time.
Second -Get your CV updated and in front of other companies.

I don't know anyone whose accepted VR without having a backup plan/another job to go to.

How long would the package see you through for?

I think it's easy for people to say - there's no jobs out there - but none of us have any idea what you do, so how would we know? In my field, there are TONS of jobs - well paid, interesting and particularly in the public sector.

My company and role sounds much like yours in that at least two other people should be sharing my load. Demand for my projects increases as resources are tightened. But they're profit-making and don't give a shit. Soon as I can I'm hot-footing it back to the public sector.

Check out the situation in your field, ignore sweeping generalisations and get a real sense of what's out there. Make a decision based on facts, not a fear based decision.

I second the advice to find out how things stand in your particular industry. Can you speak to a couple of recruitment consultants/agencies just to sound them out?

I'm in a different sector but I know that in the past I've had chats with recruitment consultants to get a feel for the market and they've been happy to help out.

I too work in the public sector - cuts really hitting home, and ridiculous expectations from 'higher up' (like you, not immediate boss, it's the decisions that are made by the City Council which go across the board, irrespective of how that affects each Team). There's been a recruitment freeze for almost 3 years now. When someone leaves you team, that's it - people are expected to just add that person's workload to their own. So, we should have 19 of us on our team,but we currently have 7.5 (but 2 are off long term, so working with 5.5) That's what we've been trying to do on our team, and all it's resulted in is even more people then going off with mental health problems.

At some point, you have to (and I know it's not easy - but it might be easier if your whole team are able to talk about it together, rather than it seeming to be one person having a moan ?) but you have to say 'I can't do this any longer', otherwise, you'll just go under.

Would it be possible to go in and present it less as a "I'm not coping" but more of a "Clearly there's more work here than the team can do in the hours we have, how do you want us to prioritise what gets done and what gets left / somehow done with a 'lighter touch' ?" That puts the onus back on "management" to do some re-jigging, and it's not a case of you (and your colleagues) being driven under.