To feel that it's not good enough???

[glasshalffullornot]

OK...So we are moving house, to a much nicer area than the one we currently live in.

The differences are:

Our current house is a ex-council house, one of three mews, on a small (non-rough) estate, in a very busy, not very clean area. The other house is a lovely 1930's semi, it has a garden that is quite private and green, and is a good size with fruit trees and patio.

The new area has fantastic schools in the area in contrast to our current area.
Overall, we are moving from a deprived/disadvantaged area to a affluent-ish area, and we are expecting the move will benefit our DC and our quality of life.

I am in abit of a dillemma however, because I cant help but feel abit deflated. I just expected abit more, the house to be bigger than the 3 bedrooms it is, and the kitchen to be a bigger size than it currently is. DH has reassured me that there is potential to extend the kitchen and bedrooms, and that when we do need the space (we have one DC), we can extend.

In my head I feel unreasonable; I dont work and the mortgage/bills everything will be the full responsibility of DH. He has already stretched to our max budget because we both wanted a nice location, and I was very set on having excellent schools nearby.

So why do I feel....abit dissapointed?

AIBU?

How original

The word is naice

So yes, YABVU.

HTH

Is it?

This is a genuine post butwhy. Maybe I was looking for a slap around the head. I KNOW I am being Unreasonable, but I cant help FEELING like its not enough.

All I woudl suggest in the light of :

I dont work and the mortgage/bills everything will be the full responsibility of DH. He has already stretched to our max budget because we both wanted a nice location, and I was very set on having excellent schools nearby.

is - get off yoru arse and get a job.

sorry but I'm blunt like that.

your manage

For you OP

Yabu

You're probably nervous about moving. You can always plant a fruit tree.
I hope you'll be happy in your new home.

It sounds like your husband is planning well OP. This new home is the in the right area and has potential so is better than getting a bigger house in a rougher area with rubbish schools.

I do understand what you mean. We just had to have some work done on our house, it cost about £2k and there is nothing to show for it at all. I feel a bit resentful when we have to pay out for jobs like this.

I guess what I'm trying to say is we both need to count our blessings. We are both investing for the long run in a way if that makes sense.

@ worra

Hasn't this topic been done just recently albeit in a slightly different form?

Thanks Worra, but we're far from wealthy.

Maybe it's all just a bit overwhelming with the move and everything. Once you get settled it might all feel better.

Bawaaahhhhhh @ Worra.

We can all dream but the danger of that is no longer accepting reality. You're new house sounds like a huge step up and you need to think of it like that. Be grateful for what you have got or you will have a miserable life. Don't let your DH know this is how you feel as it is massively unfair on him. It's not his sole responsibility to get you your princess castle

pathankhan ..the fruit tree is actually in the new house

I just FEEL SO dissapointed, but would NEVER voice this to DH - I think it would break his heart

OK I'm going to state the obvious so apologies. 1930s houses are usually lovely to live in. YANBU to feel that a 3-bed house in a nice area shouldn't cost six arms, six legs and a torso, but that's the brutal truth. You will have a lovely time once you are in. Buying/moving is stressful and involves imagining a different life with every set of details you look at. Hard to let it all go.

I just feel so dissapointed and however much I try to stop myself, I still feel it.

Whenever DH talks about it and makes plans, I have to really force myself to be enthusiastic.

<a class="break-all" href="http://www.google.co.uk/imgres?q=aylesbury+estate&hl=en&client=firefox-a&hs=Msk&rls=org.mozilla:en-GB:official&biw=1366&bih=564&tbm=isch&tbnid=BZpahKXM_90EDM:&imgrefurl=danieljlewis.org/2010/02/09/data-uncertainty-southwarks-disappearing-estates/&docid=jBy42eLQLw34GM&imgurl=danieljlewis.org/files/2010/02/Aylesbury.jpg&w=800&h=600&ei=Mt1XT_CWFOGS0QW5tpW9DQ&zoom=1&iact=hc&vpx=341&vpy=197&dur=375&hovh=194&hovw=259&tx=176&ty=79&sig=108556357510223154324&page=1&tbnh=157&tbnw=212&start=0&ndsp=10&ved=1t:429,r:1,s:0" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Every time you think like that take a look at this and count your blessings rather than cockroaches.

I feel your pain. I am buying a house. its nothing special but costing ALOT. We ABU THOUGH.[WINK]

Ignoring all the cliquey bitchiness...

I'm a bit confused by your OP.

What do you mean you expected it to be more? Are you saying you didn't view it and now you're committed and have seen it you're disappointed?

Or do you mean you are going to be paying loads more than you do now, therefore expected more square footage for your money? The answer to which is location, location, location (the saying, not the show!)

joan...yes the house is lovely...it just seems smaller than I expected/wanted..

Maybe theres been such a big build up to this move that now I kind of think, is that it?? Is THIS what all the fuss has been about??

As they are so fnd of saying on Location, Location, Location (the show), there always has to be compromise. If you want a bigger house you will have to compromise on location, if you want the nice location you'll have to compromise on house size.

In short, get over it, or get up and do something about it.

Glass half full or not? More like glass completely drained!!

abra..no, we viewed twice and I love the actual style of the house, the layout, the garden, the street, the area.
It's just slightly bigger than our current house though, and I guess I always thought that our next home will be significantly bigger than our current one.

We will be paying roughly the same each month as DH had an investment return that has enabled us to put down a large deposit, so no worries on that front.

Thanks Graham..Ive saved that picture to my desktop.

petit...glad I'm not the only on!