To wonder what the hell i will do with DD in the summer holidays if i get a job.

[desperatenotstupid]

I have a job interview this week, im desperate to get the job, but the money isnt brilliant (long career break so dont expect more really). Child care not an issue during term time, the job is 24.5 hours a week. But HOW do you all cope in the holidays? Inset days etc?

My mum is 75 and i really don't think she will be able to cope with DD for that amount of time, even though she will insist she can, but i can't let her because i know it will be too much, and from a selfish point of view this will be worse than having to pay someone iysim. I need reliable childcare if im to do this, but i would consider letting her do one day a week, but i think that would be all i could commit her to. My DP is self employed but can't really turn work down as the way things are we are not in position to turn down work when its offered. Also my salary wont cover expenses if he is to have time off to do childcare in holidays. If it was, that would be ideal, the poor sod is working himself to an early grave

Would consider childminder but i would have issues with DD being taken in someone elses car i dont even let her travel alone in car with DP if i can avoid it. I dont drive - yeah, its irrational i know.

I don't have willing relatives or a flexible spouse.

We just pay for childcare, it is not optional for us.

If you are fortunate enough to not need any childcare during term time, just school holidays, then I can't see the problem from a financial viewpoint as what you earn over the year will easily be a lot more than the childcare you will need for one child. You need to look at your annual income. Of course, you may find in August your wages all go on childcare- but over the course of the year youll be in profit.

Your lack of trust in a child minder, and even worse your dds father, to drive her is really worrying though. You need to get a grip with that as it isn't good for your dd.

Try the local council sports-centres for holiday clubs, they tend to be much cheaper, ours is almost half the price of our usual after-school club. They are also excellent, ours includes swimming every day which is a real bonus and has helped my two learn to swim.

Try taking a day or two off a week yourself from your holiday entitlement, then choosing a cheapish sports-centre club, swap childcare with other mums/dads, or see if a family member might come to stay at yours/send them away for a week.

And yes, people do take their holidays separately from their spouse to cover childcare, not ideal, but we have done this except for one/two weeks a year, this means I have three weeks less to cover. Needs must for us.

" it's not do-able if you don't have willing relatives or a flexible spouse"

That's nonsense!

If you really need/ want the job, you will find a way to organise child care. It's not easy without the above but by no means impossible.

OP- if you are only working 3 days and DD can have 1 day with GM, perhaps you could take a couple of weeks of AL during the Summer, leaving only 8 days that need to be covered. That isn't going to be impossible to arrange with just one child- a few days in holiday club, maybe a 2 or 3 swaps with a friend. Sick days are difficult but if you having a willing GM, you are more fortunate than a lot of people.

Also: it's much easier with just one child (like it sounds like you have) as other parents may be happier to take one than three! So swops with other parents are feasible, and holiday clubs much cheaper with one.

I just wanted to say my df is 76 he will look after dd 10 for an odd day. I think he enjoys it he is very active though. Usually he will take her in to town and she spends all his money in the pound shop! He also makes the best home made chips ever. I wouldn't expect him to do weeks at a time but one day here and there is one less day to worry about.

'it's not do-able if you don't have willing relatives or a flexible spouse'

• glad I'm not the only person who thinks that's a cop out.

We have no relatives within a 100 mile radius. And dh and I have always worked, and we don't have jobs with flexible hours. We have paid in full for every bit of childcare our (now teenage ) children ever had, from day nursery, to before/after school childminder to holiday clubs. And believe me, holiday clubs and other childcare was less readily available back then than it is now

IME it's only women who have stayed at home when their children are pre-school who have this misconception that they will waltz into a job which neatly fits around school and will never need to pay for childcare. Those of us who went straight back to work after maternity leave are far more realistic about the fact that you have to find, and pay for, childcare

In addition to holiday clubs you could try and find another mum in the same situation and look after each others or there are probably 6th formers who would like to earn some money and they could come to your house.

How do you think anyone works if they don't have willing relatives gramercy - who are all those parents using nurseries and childminders?

I have a toddler ds, he goes to childcare when I work. When he is at school, he will still go to childcare in the holidays. That's how most working parents do it.

Plenty of two-parent families without family back-up work. We do it because we want to/need to/have to.

And I agree totally with Callmemrs about the expectations about jobs that fit, marvellously, into school hours and terms. Ironically, those are in truth more feasible to arrange for parents who have kept, doggedly, in the workplace.

Contact your local council, they should have database of childcare, including holiday clubs if your dd's school doesn't have one. You could also try here just input your postcode and it will bring up school holiday child care.

There is a lot more options here

Check out Fit 4 Sport. They actually have work-friendly hours (8.30-5.30). Work may let you jiggle your hours - maybe start early and leave early so you can get DP to take her in and you can pick her up, or do three long days so you have her for two full days, or maybe you can work from home for half a day.

Good luck with the interview. It will all fall into place - its not impossible!

If you are only working 3 days a week then that gives you 2 weekdays that you could offer to swap childcare with a school friend. There may be scope with your (hopeful) company to do 5 day weeks sometimes in term time in exchange for time off in the holidays. Otherwise, you'll just have to come to terms with the driving thing.

Am liking the holiday club ideas, DP will probably be able to have some time off in the holidays, and then i can have some annual leave etc. Thanks ladies, made me realise it will be a pain in the arse but not impossible. I really want the job, i think thats what makes it do-able, if that makes sense. If it was a crappy job i would be less inclined to make it work.

I have been a SAHM since DD born and i always knew that child care is probably more complicated once they start school, i would have thought most people realise that, bit odd to say otherwise

Its not impossible. A little daunting when you haven't had to work out the logistics before but do-able. She will be fine - kids generally enjoy day camps and they love being a bit independent!

Good luck.

Desperate you could ask any one of the single parents who work full time and have DC at the same school how they manage? You probably won't meet them at the school gates as they are busy at work trying to make sure they leave on time to collect their DC from the child minder, good friend, after school club holiday scheme, or holiday sports session.

You'll be working 3 days a week, will have DP annual leave as backup in an emergency and will be able to swop DC days with other parents. If you are also working through choice then you presumably have the option of paying for childcare as do most working parents.

One issue with working 3 days a week is that some holiday clubs only take kids for the full 5 days, i.e. you have to book a whole week. This limits the number available to you, as presumably you won't want to pay for 5 days (and lose out on 2 days with your DD) when you only need 3.

And personally, I think that unless you find another parent wanting complementary childcare, whose child gets on very well with yours, it's not great swapping childcare. Do you really want to look after someone else's child/children on your days off? Fine as an occasional thing, but not as a regular arrangement (or maybe I'm just a grump...)

When I've been working I used a holiday club. Even if her own school doesn't have one then there will be one in your town which does. Once had to use one at a private school which was very expensive and led to requests to go to private school full time, haha as if that is ever going to happen, but it was nice and they did all sorts of activities. If disabled, there are also often summer holiday clubs run by charities e.g. contact a family- I used to volunteer at one as a teenager. With a holiday club you don't need to worry about the car thing though sometimes they do go on days out by bus.

Agree with Callmemrs. You suck it up and you pay for it. When mine were in nursery I had almost no spare cash left after paying nursery fees and mortgage. But staying on the career ladder (even though it was phenomenally tight, financially) means that my career has progressed - I got accelerated promotion a few years ago, and now earn a decent wage. Had I taken time off for years when the kids were little, I'd have gone back to the same crappy job with the same crappy money.

And it is always those who have taken time out when the children are little who think they are going to step into jobs which are school hours/school holidays off. Or think they are going to step back on the career ladder where they left off, despite having had 10 + years out of the workplace. I interviewed someone a few weeks ago who wanted to get back to work after years out with her kids. She dictated to me at interview what hours she would work - "I can't stay longer than 4.30, I won't work Wednesday, I can't work school holidays." It was almost as if it was a favour to us that she wanted to work for us. And she hasn't been the only one.

All past years, i kind of feel the same way as you do about doing the childcare swap if im totally honest. I would want that time with my DD i think. Truth be told i am not entirely sure if the job IS three days a week, it is 24.5 hours so this could be spread over five days. I am hoping not because i have a project i am volunteering on two days a week that i am loathe to leave, but sadly, i am very much working for the money.

Heleninahandcart DP is self employed so would probably be the one to cover inset days and any days that DD would have off sick, although to be fair she is a resilient soul and has had only 1.5 days off school, she is in year two.

Agree - holiday clubs are the way to go.

I work part time, and have done since ds1 was 6 months old. I have also had to pay for childcare every step of the way.

It's actually fine when you get into it. The holiday club I use is flexible regarding hours etc, and the dcs really enjoy it. I have a couple of friends who will look after the children on inset days, and I use breakfast club too. If they are ill, I prefer to stay, or DH works from home. Mind you, they have to be sick, or running a temperature.

I have various friends who get a summer holiday au pair - usually a teenage daughter of a friend who wants to spend the summer somewhere different and earn some money. They usually then avoid taking any holiday during the summer holidays, and save their holiday entitlement for other school holidays when they don't have care. You obviously need space to have someone living in, but with the right person I think that could work really well.

I was a SAHM for 7 years and was worried about exactly this. Been back at work nearly a year now and its fine. I work 19 hrs pw during school holidays, 24 hours pw term time. ( This equates to three days school hours during term time ).

I cover it with a mixture of sports clubs, DH working late the odd day ( he can only do this once a week max ), my annual leave, DH's annual leave and flexible working days so can cover inset days etc.

I do work from home though, so the odd sickness/minor op that the DC have had is OK - DVD and bed whilst Mummy works is understood. Occasionally I need to work somewhere else for the day, and friends help with playdates and stuff then.