To be bloody fuming at my husband or am I just being silly

[Thingiebob]

My DH is usually a level- headed lovely sensible person but is also a bit of a lazybones when it comes to pulling his weight. I have health problems (nasty backache) and have carted myself and 2 yr old to doc today on public transport and foot as well as the normal household chores that need to be done, laundry, dishwasher, sweeping etc and entertaining a bunch of small children (friends of dd) along with all the other stuff one does.

My husband finishes work and proceeds to lay into me about the nappy bin overflowing. Emptying it was on my mental to do list but I just hadn't got it yet.

He did it himself, all the way moaning about it being a health hazard etc.

I feel really bloody aggrieved. H is not my boss, nor am I his effing housekeeper.

I lost it and swore at him in front of my child. Something we both try really hard not to do. This has compounded the issue.

Am I being over sensitive or justifiably angry. How do I explain why I am upset without it becoming a massive row?

DH has also been working hard today as well.

Someone once told me that the secret to a happy marriage is to leave at least ten things a day unsaid, I couldn't agree more especially in the case of the nappy bin.... Just effing empty it and get over it (dh I mean)

It's not like a man leaving one of his coffee cups on the work top, to whoever mentioned that. The OP didn't poo and wee in the nappies did she? They're not her nappies. they are the nappies of their child. Presumably the child that wore the nappies is her DH's child too, so why shouldn't he be the one to empty the nappy bin for once?

I'd be pissed off too if DH criticised the one thing I hadn't got around to doing!

Nappy bins are the work of the devil. I bought one and it ended up leaking everywhere. We stopped using it after that.

Personally I'd rather just chuck the nappies into an empty carrier bag and put them straight in the outdoor bin, they aren't likely to go stinky within a fortnight unless we have a hotwave anytime soon. That way you/DH have one less job to do.

he's have been wearing the contents of the nappy bin if he'd laid into me about it.

"Perhaps he would have been less annoyed by an unswept floor than an unemptied nappy bin -"

is OP supposed to plan her day according to what will annoy her DH the most if not done? as far as i am concerned, you do things because they need done, not because someone else will shout if they aren't.

I loved my Nappy bin. And just bunging it in the wheelie is a bit unreasonable if it only gets emptied every two weeks, as I known mine whiffs without nappies. It is also unreasonable if said wheelie bin is 40+ steps from the front door like mine.
Yes it's wrong to swear in front of kids, but it's not a hanging offence or one likely to cause SS to become involved.

You have a sore back, it is not good to be bending and picking up things anyways.

If your nappy bin or your outside bin stinks then why not shake the poo down the loo? I am truly horrified that so many people think nothing of keeping a fortnights worth of shite in their bin and then sending it on to landfill.

Booyhoo. Imagine you are in your house and you can see two jobs which need doing:

1. empty the nappy bin (because it stinks and is making your house smell) or
2. sweeping the floor

Which one would you do first?

whichever i got round to doing first. the decision wouldn't be based on whether someone coming home later would be annoyed more by one than the other not being done.

Ok, you're not getting it, forget it.

no, go on, patronise the thicko. i'm all ears.

tomorrow, you need to be too ill to get out of bed and he can do all the stuff you did today. don't forget to point out to him whatever thing that he missed, then ask him how it made hiom feel and consequently how does he think it made you feel. I think he is being unreasonable to point it out, and bloody unreasonable to point it out when you are poorly and lifting bins is not without pain or risk of further damage to your back.

Nappy bins are disgusting

I know nappy bins are grim but once we moved into this house, we decided for various reasons to get one. Outside bin is quite a trek and only gets emptied once a fortnight.

As for poo down the loo, yes I do empty it where possible but nappies still start to pong.

One of the reasons I had delayed emptying the bin was actually because I knew it was going to hurt my sore joints and back. A fact my DH is fully aware of and is usually quite sensitive towards.

agree with bibbity-we never had nappy bins, we used washables but can imagine a bin full of dirty napies would be dealt with before the dishwasher etc.

Ex picking on the things I didnt get round to was a HUGE part of our problems, he never did quite grasp the sahm bit. He literally seemed to think cleaning was the only aspect of being at home. His education was a rocky road!

That said I had a nappy bin for a week - the smell was appalling poo flushed or not! It was a pain but every nappy went out to the bin, usually with half dressed dc under one arm LOL

Hmm...

Still not sure if IABU or not.

Clearly IABU possessing a nappy bin. I have got that much from this thread!

Of course YANBU! He was a bloody twonk for mentioning it. The gentlemanly thing to do would've been for him to empty it himself without a word.

Your dh is being an arse, when my back plays up all I ask dh to do is empty the bin and nappy bin ( it has scented bags so it never smells )

YANotBU. You really should not bend and lift with a bad back.
The only solution I can think of is collect the nappies and every night one of you go out back to the outside bin. Can't he do it, since he is able bodied?

we use cloth so if my dh had complained about the nappy bin i would have told him not to forget to scrape the liners before he put them in with 3 under 3 i think my husband is just grateful theres still a house when he gets home!