..to give my three cats the sack?

[SweetestThing]

..due to non-performance of duties? Opened the drawer to get a clean tea towel and found chewed-up towels and mouse droppings.

AIBU?

Give them a written warning first, with a clear performance improvement plan and some targets. That should sort it (cats respond well to management bollocks)

Do I have to write it in cat-speak? One miaow for yes, a hiss for no, that kind of thing? :)

Are they male? Male cats are terrible hunters.

All the female cats I've ever been owned by have been terrifyingly effective hunters.

Agree, Summer. Boy cat is lazy git, girl cat is killing machine

No written warnings, I think this is gross misconduct.

Two female (one spends all her time being catslut with passers-by, the other sleeps all the time) and one male (FatCat - guess what he spends all his time doing?).

To be fair, we do often find mouse/shrew/unidentifiable rodent entrails in the hall....but they've let me down badly on this one. Not only that, they've let themselves, and the entire cat population, down too :o

Leave the bastards.

You are a victim of their domestic non-violence.

Shame Shame on them.........

ComposHat - :o

Ration the Whiskas and remove all jingly/feathery toys until you see improvement.

Improve your housekeeping skills.
The teatowles didn't get shredded overnight

YANBU.

(not an actual sack with bricks in though, just to be clear.)

The teatowles didn't get shredded overnight
wanna bet? mice can be astonishingly destructive.

I took a clean one out yesterday morning and there was no evidence of Ms/Mr Mouse in residence!

I was going to . I am not seriously questioning your slatternly nature and can't really judge how destructive mice can be.
I don't have a tea towel drawer, mine just hang around in the kitchen.
If you want two new ones just let me know. I can deliver.
Mine are especially skilled in catching bees, frogs and leaves.

You can borrow my cat she washes carpets with her own unique carpet fluid

she sometimes catches a leaf or two things too

very useful

ripishere..... mice are like tiny tasmanian devils (loony toon style), they can shred a vast quantity of towel/newspaper/plastic bags overnight.

ripishere, that's kind of you, but I've still got plenty of (unshredded!) tea towels, which are being washed at 60 degrees as I type :)

FruitShootsandHeaves (love the name, btw) - one of our three also has that special carpet cleaning fluid facility......

Mine is fantastic! Even brings extra mice in to chase around if he's lacking within our own four walls....There's dedication for you.

It's only a matter of time before someone's cat starts its own AIBU thread...

AIBU to object to the felinogynistic attitudes of the humans I deign to share my space with? They seem to expect me to do more than eat, sleep and perform natural bodily functions.

Okay, I admit that sometimes I bring home a feathered or furry plaything to bat around the kitchen, but it is not my job to search out any foreign four-legged small things that may have entered Cat Towers of their own volition.

My boy cat has teamed up with the girly cat next door.... while he is happy to catch prey he is very reluctant to actually kill it (usally gets board and drops it/them in the kitchen for us, or lets them 'go' under the tree at his nap time 23 hours of the day missy next door is a hopless hunter Cat has started passing on his 'gifts' to her much to the disaproval of my neighbour ;)

One of our two boys has an admirable work ethic . Record is 7 mice in one day. Two mice in today. He has developed a new technique to eat them - bitten their heads off and sucked their guts like a Frube. We live near a lot of woods. He used to bring our recently departed elderly tabby one ever so often to play with.
Interestingly the only birds he brings in are magpies and robins. I imagine they are the ones taunting him with a round of "Come and have a go if you think you're hard enough" and of course he is.
His brother however is a big lazy lump with an expensive skin condition.