AIBU to think that people should bloody well rsvp their child's party invite??

[blueskycp]

12 invites given out at nursery a month ago. 4 replies. Is this normal? Can people just not be arsed to send a text or leave a message? I'm new to this game

Yes, it's normal and no, people cannot be arsed to muster up even a tiny smidgeon of politeness or consideration. You have to find them and ask, despite the fact you've sent the invite with details of how they can contact you.

Is this your eldest and first child?

I know. It is so rude. I think you have been unlucky though. I sent out 20 invites to DS1's party and got 2 no replies which I thought was quite good going.

I am always really pleased for my DCs when they get party invites and reply straight away

I'm getting really hardcore now and only booking places for the ones who replied. let the parents sort it out if they turn up on the day

Yes. Eldest and first child. I don't know the parents but DD seems to get on well with the other kids.
Didn't really expect to have to chase people up about it - but is this what you have to do?

Well when you have a bag full of invites, homework, sponsership forms from the school, cubs and brownies, requests to attend faisr, bake sales, applications to secondary schools, speech therapy classes, tantruming toddlers who choose every time you pick up the phone to kick off then sometimes, just sometimes you may forget to reply to a party invite or think in your addled state that you have replied when maybe you haven't. But yes I don't reply because I am too spoilT, lazy and precious.

Do you realise how self righteous you all sound?

mercibucket - that's my worry that they'll turn up on the day and it's going to cost me a fortune!

A lot of people have those things to contend with but still manage to send a text or whatever to reply, Its common courtesy.

I think it is really rude not to rsvp. But I always rsvp within an hour possibly seeming a bit desperate (on behalf of DS) or so DH says .

When is the party, and did you put a deadline on the RSVP? I've found that sometimes parents don't reply until close to the party itself, because they can't get their heads round planning very far ahead.

Must admit after having 3 children I have yet to come across the lack of RSVP ing. I will count my blessings!

A genuine case of forgetting is fine, however when I sent out DS invites for his birthday this year it was exactly the same people as last year who didnt bother to reply at all. Its just bloody rude.

If you dont want to come just text/write a note to say your busy - not difficult.

People then turning up on the day is also a nightmare.

Well Katkouka the op doesn't have those things and I think basic kind understanding goes a hell of a lot further than "common courtesy". Life is frantic and fast-paced and things get ovewrlooked by accident. My point is people don't set out to be rude or lacking in "common courtesy". And when people dont rsvp to my dcs' parties I simply ask them if they can make it rather than tut tutting like a puritan about peoples' lack of manners.

I'm with TheBlackberrySet.

Things get mislaid. Things get forgotten. That's life! If you haven't had replies, get in touch with the parents to remind them. Be proactive. But, most of all, remember that whilst your precious little darling's birthday bash may be top of your list of priorities, it isn't top of many other peoples.

oneof - I put 'asap'. The party is this Sunday. Got 7 coming inc. her little sis :) so it's not too bad but just disappointed with the response from nursery. We're all leading busy lives and I appreciate it's difficult to find time to send a text

Adults don't RSVP to things these days even if they don't have kids...not everyone has forms from cubs and brownies in their handbags! What's their excuse, then??

I can understand not replying to an emailed invite, but when someone has taken the time to properly invite you to something, you RSVP, or you're being rude.

Unfortunately it sounds like you have to chase people these days OP

You are not leading half as busy a life as you will be when your precious first born is a little older.

Are you telling me that you have never started to reply to a text and then been interrupted leading you to forget that you never sent it? That has really never happened to you?? Because it happens to me all the time. The only time I have uninterrupted leisure to reply to texts is when the kids are asleep and by then I have a million and one things to do or remember so stuff gets forgotten. Is that really so hard to understand or warrant the passive agressive faces

tbh I expect my kids to tell me if they've got an invite (obv in op's case, at nursery that might be expecting a bit too much) not to leave it languishing at the bottom of their book bag. funnily enough my children always give me the party invites, but the invites to extra maths class after school often seem to mysteriously disappear.

If you've got time to remember the day and show up on the day, having presumably found the time to buy a present, then you have the time to send a text to say you'll be coming.

It's a blinking nightmare isn't it? We had a big party for DS, out of his class 10 got back and said yes or no quite quickly which was great. 5 text the morning of the party to say they were coming- obviously waiting for something better to come up - and 3 turned up on the day without any RSVP. The other 10 invited just didn't get in touch either way. I just think it's rude. From speaking to other parents it seems pretty normal for people to wait until the last minute. In this day and age of text and email (I gave lots of options for RSVP'ing) there's no excuse and if you are really that chaotic and can't organise yourself I'd recommend Flylady!

What about working parents who aren't around at drop-offs and pick-ups to ask these frantically busy people whether their dc will be attending? Some (me, for example) may not know the parents at all and wouldn't be able to begin chasing them. I agree that life is busy and it would make it that little bit easier if people would follow helpful conventions like RSVPs.

Of course, anyone can overlook the odd invite but some people seem to have a policy of not replying and that is rude imo.

yikes - this thread had just reminded me that I need to RSVP to an invite DD2 got last week Will do it when I see the mum on the pre-school run tomorrow

Think I'm still within the reply by date though

Well I do agree that just turning up on the day without saying you are coming is a bit much and I really hope I haven't done that. I don't think I have.

I am more talking about just reminding people they haven't sent an rsvp.

Wow Blackberry set, touched a raw nerve?
A text message takes 2 seconds, hardly a big ask.

My DH was all for not letting those that hadn't replied in, I thought that was a bit harsh! :o