Homework heaven or homework hell?

[Boysandgirlscomeouttoplay]

Well for us it's been homework hell this weekend.

Dd1 is in y2 and has an incredible amount of homework - at least 20 mins each day plus reading plus spellings and double homework at weekends.

I'm finding it really hard to motivate her - excuses by the dozen tired hungry need the loo dropped my pencil tired hungry thirsty but mummy I gmhate homework!

Admit/confess to being a shouty mummy at times which just is so self defeating and I recognise not good basis for our relationship. And I know IABU by being shouty :-(

Feel like I'm drowning - need some advice and tactics - help please !!!

My DD also Yr 2 has:
Mon - spellings (17 words + write 4 sentences with them... takes aaaages!)
Tues - Maths usually website games (she loves this, but it doesn't teach, just reinforce)
Wed - reasoning books
Thurs - double sided maths sheet, but usually fairly easy ( again just reinforcing)
Fri - 'literacy' book - various activities

It IS a lot, with reading each day. Plus she has visual therapy exercises to do and I'm trying to do Apples & Pears / extra phonics with her as she needs more support on this. To be honest I would ask school if she can miss some but she actually likes doing most of it especially the maths - typically the stuff she doesn't like is the work that she actually needs to spend more time on (spellings!).

It HAS to be done for the next day so there's just no room for negotiation / putting it off which does make it easier. I have been shouty mummy too about reading more than HW :(

How are other people in the class finding it?

The only tactic we use on excessive homework is don't do it! I refuse to let our home turn into a battleground about some usually pointless chore of a task that has been set to fulfil a quota. If it's a reasonable request that reinforces a point from a lesson fair enough, we make DS do it but anything that encroaches on our time as a family or causes stress is a no no. I'm quite happy to see the teacher to explain why the work hasn't been done if necessary. And I work in education too.

I agree. This should not result in damage to your relationship with her, or her free time.

Do they do SATs? If so, this sounds like SATs panic, which is entirely the school's problem and should not be passed on to your daughter as pressure. Way to turn a child off learning ..........

I'm sure school would also agree that it shouldn't become a battle ground, especially at this age. Some HW is reasonable but 7 things a week PLUS spellings PLUS reading does seem a lot. Advice? See what others think and approach school - individually not as a gang.

I don't think primary children should do any homework apart from reading, and for small children the focus should be on being read to. We had a horrible time with ds when he was small, with evenings being dominated by homework arguments (often ending with him having a complete breakdown and full on tantrums). It got even worse when they started on projects, which are IMO a total waste of time and effort. When we moved to the States the homework expectations increased - they had two hours Mon-Thursday (although not having homework over the weekend was very nice), which was only possible because for a while both dh and I were at home. We were very glad to discover that the next school they went to didn't do homework at all.

The crazy thing is that when we complained to the English primary school when ds was being sanctioned for not doing homework (very frustrating as he had actually done it, just forgotten to hand it over) they showed us the homework policy which claimed the reason for homework was to prepare children for work. Why a seven year old needs to be prepared for work is beyond me, especially as at work I consider it to be very poor time management to have to take stuff home...

OP, I would talk to the teacher and explain how much stress this is causing.

This is simply counter productive. Giving Y2's lots of HW is just going to make them dislike school and their evenings miserable.
Reading, spellings, Brownies and swimming and sleep are what 7 year olds need.
(clearly substitute after school activities with ones of your DCs choosing)

Some practical advice though, if the school is not going to change their policy..

Have a nice snack ready for when you walk in through the door. Also pencils rubber etc all ready Don't discuss HW, just put the kettle on, pour juice / milk etc sit at table with biscuits / grapes, cheese and crackers, whatever. Unpack school bag without any talk about HW, just general chat. Have a kitchen timer and say "look, I've set this for 2o mins, come and sit with me and we'll look at (whatever you have to do today). When the buzzer goes off, we stop and then we can do...x"

Children generally like to show off if they can do it. Ask questions that can't be answered with yes or no. So not "Can you do this? / do you need me to help" but "Show me how you figure this out. What's the first part?"

When the 20 mins buzzer goes, just pack up ( however well / badly it's gone) "well done, you did 20 mins now you can go and..." and write a note to teacher to let them know. Expect 3 days of not a lot happening and you may have to be pretty determined to keep your patience, but by the end of the week I bet it will be better.

This seems alot of homework however if your childs school is outstanding or improving I can see why they do this, not that I agree. I found this with my ds2. Now I have opposite problem, school not sending any and at y3 I can see a distinct difference in ability between my dd and her 2 much older brothers when they were at the same stage. I set my own homework and download fun resources so she thinks she is playing sometimes. Also I think with practice they begin to see it as routine like brushing teeth. A copy of the curriculum for each subject is available online, I test her frequently and work on problem areas. It is a bit time consuming but worthwhile seeing the daily improvement rather than having to wait for parents evenings. I also know that all the curriculum has been covered and understand what she has done when she comes home and says we did so and so.

OP that sounds like an awful lot of homework for her age!

My DD is in year 1 and also gets a lot of homework. I must confess to being somewhat selective in the homework that gets completed.

She goes to school to work, at home we do stuff as a family and whilst I instill the importance of homework to them, I don't think it's more important than everything else!