Is "I need a bit of time away from my dcs" a horrible thing to say?

[GlueSticksEverywhere]

Someone on another thread has announced that no parent (even those with PND) should ever need time to themselves and it's a horrible thing to say if you do . . . wondered what others thought.

(apologies for the thread about a thread, not sure if there's a rule against it )

[MarshaBrady]

It's best for everyone for people to have breaks from one another. I need it for sure.

[ssd]

"Give a lot of those parents £8K to blow on an all inclusive family holiday with amazing Kid's Clubs...or present them with a willing trio of family babysitters, and those parents would off-load their DCs so fast it would make their kid's heads spin"

jesus who's being smug now lequeen?

[TheFallenMadonna]

I do find "as a family" one of the most heartsinking phrases on MN. Which is odd, because I'm pretty fond of mine really...

[ssd]

seemed more like a big old brag to me

[motherinferior]

Ah, now I find the fetishisation of 'couple time' a bit weird, personally. Time away from all the buggers, less so.

[youarekidding]

Not horrible at all.

I enjoy my holidays from work because I need space from my collegues.
I enjoy turning off my phone because I need time away from friends.

The same way as I enjoy time away from DS so we both have things to talk about, what we did, how we felt about it.

I'm single but I know that none of my friends spend every waking moment with their DH/DP and neither did I because then conversation dries up and every little irritation becomes a major deal.

[youarekidding]

but for some reason I NEVER need time away from MN

[solidgoldbrass]

LeQ: I think that's unsurprising. Some people are just not very interesting sociable anyway, they like to be At Home, on the sofa, with the telly on. Like the ones who only socialised to Find A Partner and once they did so, you never saw 'em again.

[PiedWagtail]

I like to have time away from my dcs AND my dh :) Does that make me terrible?!

[springydaffs]

I once (briefly) hid in the wardrobe to get away from my kids. Love em but you need a break sometimes. I was on the top floor, it was so quiet, I heard them clumping up the stairs and...

[NowThenWreck]

My mum went out every Saturday afternoon on her own when I was little (or with friends-not sure) and I leave my son at my mums for a night whenever she offers (once a month maybe.)
There is no-one on earth I want to be with 24/7.

I don't know if that other thread is even real-OP sounds a bit bizarre in tone, but the thing that made me laugh about it was the competitive frugality that you get on MN all the time:
"£35!! On a top! I could get a weeks shopping and 3 tops from Primark for that!!"

[solidgoldbrass]

Other thread is very odd. But there have always been some people who really get off on their own martyrdom anyway.

[NowThenWreck]

Actually, If I were to buy a non-charity shop top (which rarely happens) I would be unlikely to spend less than £35. I hate cheap shit clothes.

[squeakytoy]

I completely understand parents who want a bit of time to themselves away from their kids.

There are two important relationships in a family.. not just the whole family, but a relationship between a couple as well. One day the kids will have grown up, moved out, and be getting on with their lives, and it is the couples who have spent the last 20 years doing "family stuff" that find themselves completely lost when faced with just each other, and it is really common for relationships to break down at that point as well.

[Finallyfinally]

LeQ, I think I'd have been tempted to take the martyrs at their word...

"Why take your children on holiday when you clearly don't want to spend time with them?"
"Really? That's a thought. I wondered if it was a bit much but now you mention it..."

[motherinferior]

One of my problems with 'couple time' though is that in Today's Busy Modern Life it's even harder to get time with your other relationships, doing stuff with your friends. I do, after all, live with my partner. Should the urge to speak to him come over me, I would probably know where he was. If I don't make a bit of an effort to see my friends, though, they'll completely disappear off my radar. And the thought of coming to after 20 years and finding myself alone with just DP is quite horrid.

[AnnieLobeseder]

I get away from my family as often as I can - I run, I go to choir, I work full time.

I am a solitary person, we live in a tiny house where we're always on top of each other (one small room downstairs, two small rooms upstairs for 4 of us) and I need to get out for my own sanity. Doesn't mean I don't love them, but I need downtime to be able to function.

Wouldn't occur to me to think I was a poor parent because of it, but then I don't care much what other people think of my parenting as long as my DDs are happy and healthy.

I can't say I understand people who want to spend every waking moment with their families, but then they don't understand me either. Doesn't make either side right or wrong...

[elizadoulalittle]

I'm with you annie. I need space to function, not just from dcs but dh too. If I don't get enough time away I get depressed which has a negative effect on dcs. I am a SAHM but I have 2 in school and toddler goes to nursery for some of the week.

I struggle at weekends and as I haven't had a chance to clean this week and spending today having a blitz which feels like a break, Dh has taken 2 youngest out and DD1 (10) knows that it is cleaning day and I must get on. I am having 2010 mintues break upstairs on MN.

[Proudnscary]

What are all of us on here doing now if it's not 'me time' hmm, hmmmmmm??