to think that people who help out at school,

[TheIIlusiveShadow]

are just there to spy on the kids.

And their daughters get to be Mary in the Nativity.

Do people really think that??

I help out at school because I like children and it's fun to help out.

Other parents really think I'm spying? On what?

That makes me feel really sad!

Spy on the kids? How weird. I go on school trips cos I like the trips and I get to eat a picnic.

I don't help in the classroom though. The thought of that brings me out in a cold sweat.

One of the mums at our school volunteered to listen to readers and then proceeded to tell people she was shocked at how bad at reading some of the children were and to tell people what reading band certain kids were on.

I do it because it helps the school, but I do like the fact that it helps me get a better picture of what goes on inside the school and get to know the staff a bit more and I don't see the problem with that, so long as you aren't using the information as gossip.

I read with my son's class, hearing lots of other readers at around about his level has really helped me see the way children learn differently and helped me with helping my own children (who have both struggled a bit with reading). It's just nice to be involved with the school and the children.

I volunteer at the school, in my children's classes and others as well.

I assure you, one's own children are nowhere near as interesting to watch as other people's children. It's sometimes fun, but there's nothing to be gained as a parent by doing it.

I have volunteered to help at school in any class other than ds because his behaviour is worse when I'm in the room.

It's nice to be involved in the school. It's also nice when you see children improving. I had my own little group last year and it was very rewarding to see their enthusiasm and ability both coming on really well over the year.

Don't judge other by your own thoughts.

I used to help out in DS school, both in his class and others - listening to other children read. I had absolutely no involvement with my own child, and I could care less about what reading levels other children were on because once they reach about y3/4 it all becomes a bit irrelevant really what level they were on in Reception, yes, it really does.

I remember another mum from ds' class though, going in to help out, and then coming back afterwards and standing in the park saying "well now I know which children are the troublemakers and which I need to keep my child away from," and she went on and on and on to talk about individuals and their behavior - absolutely not appropriate.

I never even discussed my own child's reading with other parents because yes, I did know what level most others were on, and to me it was never a contest but equally I never thought it appropriate to do so.

I agree about seeing them improve, I read with a boy a couple of weeks ago who I hadn't read with since the summer term and wow, he had come a long way, it's lovely.

Do you volunteer at your dc's school, TheIllusiveShadow? Or are you just criticising those parents who are willing (and have the time) to go and help with your dc's education? Because the latter seems petty and nasty to me.

I think you are probably right in a small number of cases. There should be an understanding that any information they come across relating to the children should remain confidential (reading levels etc). Tbh I would have thought that would go without saying, but after reading what MrsBeakman has said, I guess not!

I will definitely be helping out when DS1 starts school if I'm still working part-time. There is a definite need for the children to have more one to one reading time and I really love reading to kids/listening to them read, mine as well as other people's. I would be doing it because it's something I enjoy doing.

I would love to move so that DS doesn't go to a crap school, but if I can't I plan to be a governor/chair of PTA ANYTHING to be 'in' with the school.

We have to read a policy and sign up to it before we volunteer, one part is confidentiality, what you see in school stays in school. If you have any concerns you go to the teacher.

YABU. Don't be so paranoid!

YABU. I only know one or two who go on every trip as they are very overprotective and follow their own kid like a hawk. The rest are just free and were asked to help. I used to help alot and really enjoyed it, I wasn't nosy at all. I never watched the swimming when I walked them down as felt it would be an intrusion to watch and didn't want other parents asking me how they were doing etc (I have heard some discuss this kind of thing), so i read a book.

when i helped out many many many years ago there was a special needs class where i was doing bits and pieces , and i would never dream of saying oh i saw SO n SO struggle with reading today thats just horrible , mrs i hope the mum who did that was moved from the class ,

I helped out a bit when I just had the one child.I suppose it was to spy a teensy bit, I think I had pfb syndrome and wanted to see what he got up to all day. The main reason was that I felt I ought to, I worked p/t was around during school hours and would have gelt guilty if I hadn't helped out.

"spy" - er why?

i help when i am not working because its great to see them in that enviroment and my ds loves it when I do.

must be pretty paranoid to see it as spying!

It's the only reason I'd do it!

I mean, to spy on my OWN kids, not to vicariously squint at other people's tedious offspring.

My DS had been at school for 5 yrs before I volunteered. I did it because the school needed people and I was a SAHM. I never worked in a class that DS was in as I know his behaviour would have deteriorated if I was there.
DS left the school 4 years ago and I still volunteer there - because they need volunteers. I listen to infants read on a 1-1 basis and the staff and children all appreciate the help. I have helped out with school trips too.
Our education system desperately needs propping up - it cannot cope without volunteers. Whatever peoples' reasons are for volunteering, they are very much needed. It is up to the school to make sure all volunteers are aware of the need for confidentiality and parents should not expect just to work in classes with their own children.

Blimey OP. I used to be a volunteer at DS's school doing the one to one reading. Whilst I didn't conciously "spy" it did give me some sort of idea what sort of books I should be buying for my DS and to help me guage how he was keeping up etc.

I then went on to work for interpol