AIBU To allow my dcs to have their bedroom any colour they want

[shaka12003]

Hi all just after a general view on whether iabu by letting my dcs have their bedroom decorated in what ever colour they want.

The dcs have never had a bedroom of their own before and we promised them when they did we would decorate them how they wanted.

Dd had hers done first for her birthday in pink and lilac and fairys shes 7 not my and dps choice of colour but she loves it.

Ds is now having his done and he wants a football bedroom so ive ordered him bedding and curtains and lightshade in his football team. He has asked for us to paint the walls in the colour of theteams away shirt compleate with crest and logo. Weve agreed to this and i started yesterday. People are saying that wabu doing it as the colour is red and black.

Ds is 6 so not a baby and our argument is its his room he has to sleep and play in their not us.

so aibu by doing what dcs want in their own bedroom.

When I was about 11 we moved into a house with beautiful wallpaper and upholstery, fake French chateau style. My room had salmon pink textured wallpaper, matching curtains and a cream carpet- precisely my mum's idea of the right setting for her daughter. Naturally, you couldn't stick up random pictures on walls, everything had to go with the room and be properly balanced. I loathed that room with a vengeance, but had to live with it until I moved from home at 18. I would have done anything for a room that I could shape.

My dcs have walls painted in a colour chosen by them and can stick up anything they like whenever they like. Their room, their space.

Both my DC have picked their own room designs. I did apply a slight veto on DD's choice as she wanted pink with Peppa pig and I thought she would grow out of Peppa very quickly. So we compromised on pink with hearts and butterflies.

DS's room is orange(!)

With both children I told them that we would not be decorating their rooms again for x years and they had to be sure they liked whatever they chose.
Though I think you can do a lot of changing just by putting up posters etc - without entirely redecorating.

People are saying that wabu doing it as the colour is red and black

Well my answer to these 'people' would be that as soon as they start paying your mortgage and decorating bills, they'll get a say in how you decorate your own house.

well im off to finish the black off now wish me luck

I think red and black is fine - you can de-football it when he gets older and have a cool teenage boys room easily.

If you are worried by painting over it all eventually then just do one wall in red and black. And if you use blackboard paint for the black bit he could have a great area for drawing on or chalking up footie scores or whatever.

If you think it is going to be too dark why not use a nice pale grey for one of the walls - just a paler shade of black and not as harsh a contrast as grey.

I was allowed to choose my own bedroom colours when I was 5 or 6 and I loved my room. I chose 'puroon' which my mum eventually determined was a dark mixture of purple and maroon. She decided it was too dark for the whole room so did a couple of Walls in a paler shade and it was great. I was given my old duvet cover by my mum to use as a spare - turns out 25 or so years later without realising I managed to paint my hall in a very nice fetching shade of raspberry - which turned out to be a perfect match for my ancient puroon duvet :-)

I do think that people do like certain colours and that it is something within them - when we moved house lots of it was painted a wheaty yellow colour which on the one hand was a perfectly acceptable colour that my mum and sis both loved (and is very similar to the colours in their houses) but yet left me feeling really discombobulated. (don't get a chance to say that word very often! :o)

yanbu, but warn them you may need to repaint something bland when it comes time to sell/move.

My DS wanted his a nice bright blue, with lots of posters and Star Wars/Dr. Who bedding.

I don't personally like blue but it's his room.

I'm looking forward to his teenage years and hoping he'll want it painted black - that'll be fun doing!

My parents like wallpaper and flouncy shit. Bedding, lampshades, wallpaper, etc all had to match. Had loads of fake flowers, little bowls of that smelly flower stuff and similar weirdness. Some of the stuff they pick is lovely but back in the 80s their taste was extremely questionable and I lived in a haze of pale pink patterenedness.

Even now my mum will say things like 'that's not very you' or 'when you were younger you liked..' It is me and I didn't like....! I couldn't stand!! I lived with because I had no choice!

The only colour I would refuse is if they wanted all black [my eldest wanted this when he was a teenager but I said no], I think all black drains the light and could be depressive, IMO not something to encourage in a teenager. Black and white would have been ok.
So YANBU. I am sure your son will love his room, and supporting a football team isn't something he is going to grow out of quickly either so he shouldn't get sick of it.

My DC have been allowed to choose the colour for their bedrooms since about the same age as your DC. The thing about paint is it can be painted over, even the darker colours.

DS has had several themes and colours already. We've always let him choose as its his room so should be to his liking not neccessarily ours, i've not disliked anything so far but he's yet to reach his teens

If you aren't planning to move in the next few years, have the time for faffy paint schemes and don't think they will hate it in a couple of years I don't see the problem. You'll just need a good pale undercoat when it gets painted over, or lining paper.

I always remember, when I was about 7, being taken to "choose" wallpaper for one wall of my bedroom. I was told I could pick whichever one I wanted and chose a lovely one with animals on it, hughe garish animals including a round pink pig the only one I can still remember in detail and the little bits of background between the animals was black. My mam said no, and picked one with jungle animals on it in a scene, and I hated it. I said so, and was punished for "being ungrateful" and told I should be pleased, look at all the work they did to make it nice, some children have no wallpaper etc etc ad nauseum, and I loathed that wall paper for all the time it was up several years as I recall I still remember how I felt and would never want one of my children to feel that way.
My DCs have always been allowed to have the colours they want, even though it took us three coats of white to cover the ah, dubious graffiti in no2 son's room left by pfb and his teenage friends from the time they decorated half the room and got bored before his brothers moved in there since they can now read.

Go for it, your children will love you for it. I mean, obviously they love you now, but you know what I mean.

Actually can I come and live with you? I think I love you too.

My DS wanted red and black back in the early 80's so I got black furniture with red handles, a grey black and red carpet,three dove grey walls with football posters and one wall in the black on red with logos.The bedding was also football themed. It was a great success. Then when he was 15 he wanted all black! We changed handles and one wall to black and he changed posters.We bought new black bedding (horrible) and a black rug. Now he is 42 and lives in a house full of light colours and white walls so he wasn't harmed by his macabre early taste-YANBU at all.

My DS has decided on a football team themed room too (11yo) and I would love a simple scheme like red & black! Unfortunatly we are now stuck with looking for the right claret & (frankly sickly) blue paint because we stupidly said they could decorate there own rooms ... beats DD's choice though - the purplest purple you have ever seen & bright vivid pink... YANBU really, let them choose the colours, their room, their space.

YANBU - the child's choice! It is their space, quick one coat paint of neutral shade when you sell! :)

well ive done all the woodwork black now and the half a wall black. teh red is bright postbox red lol. Ithink it looks wicked. The annoying thing is our teams colours are royal blue which would be easy this is their away colours so will change. oh well Thanks for all the support. I promise to put some pics on when ive finished

You are lovely parents! When we moved house when I was about 6 or 7 my parents let me choose the colour scheme in my room and it was one of the loveliest memories I have, feeling so peaceful and happy hanging out in my pink and grey room

Adrian Mole painted his bedroom black and he turned out OK Seriously, YANBU; let em have what they want, it's their room. Then they can hardly argue about you having the rest of the house the way you want it.