to ask how often your reception age DCs have tantrums?

[MuddlingThroughItAll]

DS is 4.9 and has recently been getting very worked up over tiny things. It's getting to the point know where he'll be having a couple of tantrums a day, with a few major meltdowns a few times a week. It's worse than when he was a toddler and he gets himself into a state over the smallest things. Is this normal for his age and how often do your 4-5 year olds have tantrums?

Sounds normal to me!

As a 4yo, DS regularly had them a few times a week, soemtimes more than one a day. As a five yo, a bit less but still pulls a few big ones out of the hat.

They have a lot to take on board in Reception and are without their parents whilst trying to form friendships, deal with conflict, learn new things etc. It's a longer day than nursery was and DS used to be completely knackered. He has adjusted now he is in Y1 but the tantrums haven't gone away completely yet.

can have a bit of a meltdown if tired, but not tantrums as such

sounds normal... my granddaughter has one at least once a day if she doesnt get her own way.. she is nearly 6

Yes - DS (just 5) had one earlier about putting on his shoes himself - 10 mins of screaming the place down. I think it's worse since school since he's picked up tips from teh other kids and also is generally more knackered and prone to flying off the handle.

Very rarely now tbh (he is 5 next week). Fights with his sister a lot more now though which is equally annoying

Glad to hear it! He's my third DC but the older two were generally a lot more chilled out than him.

At 4 we seem to be out of the full scale daily meltdown phase but that could all change when DS starts school in september! With my other DC the first few months of school lead to a reverse in their behaviour at home.

One of mine was still having meltdowns at 9 6.
Reception age children are going through big changes, big pressures to control themselves at school, hence can only let rip with someone they love and trust, and are often tired and hungry at certain times of the day.

Might be worth asking how happy and relaxed he is at school, just to rule out anything that's upsetting him.

I mean asking teacher/ CA

DD2 is 5 and remarkably sanguine, she rarely even gets the grumps. DD1 however has never stopped having meltdowns and is now ten! I think we're going to have a complete run of them until she's in her twenties TBH

Hi

You are describing my Dsd who is now aged 14!!
She has always been the same though- her sister cool as a cucumber.

I think that children at that age can't "say", so they "do" and act out their "emotions" as said in previous posts big change going on for her. I can only wonder of the steep learning curve that she is on at the moment.

I would double check no issues of bullying/conflict or problems at school if it hasn't improved by half term (worse case scenario, likely no need to worry AT ALL).

My DS was actually worse in Year 1, as he really felt the pressure to conform in a way he didn't in Reception. I used to get the brunt of it after school at least twice or three times a week. Actually, the school walls outside the building took a good kicking that year! They are under a lot of pressure and tired out and often hungry, but it's hard not to feel upset and embarrassed when they're having a very public meltdown and they're long past the toddler stage. You have to try to detach and convince yourself nobody is watching or judging! I used to treat him to the occasional milkshake or hot chocolate too, whenever I caught him being good.

DD (Yr 1) builds to meltdowns as the half-terms progress - by Christmas time she was having one every evening. She had one this week because we took her out to a party till 9.00 pm last weekend and even two hours lost sleep makes a big difference.

And, at school she is a very slow eater and rarely eats more than about 1/5 of her lunch so when she comes out, having had breakfast at 7.00 am, she is so so hungry that she can be foul-tempered - GRRRRRR

Peeriebear

DD1 had tantrums until she was 12 and then turned into a lovely teenager so there's hope for you yet :)

DD2 has never been one for having tantrums... but she is getting more stroppy as she approaches the teenage years.

I don't even want to talk about DD3 :(

Not many really maybe a couple of times a week. She does silent protest which is her version of a tantrum. DS1&2 were even better tempered...

I am perfect obviously.

[omits DS3 and his magnificent temper]

Tonight we had a complete paddy over eating a carrot. He's going to bed now and having a lie in tomorrow morning. I think it must be the over tiredness from school that's getting to him.