to think sharing our bed with baby on the odd occassion is ok?

[Newmummytobe79]

I don't co-sleep and this is not a post to argue for or against - each to their own.

But on the odd occassion we have brought baby into our bed. Morning feeds/when ill/when won't sleep and it's a last ditch attempt at any of us getting any sleep at all! Usually between 1 - 3 hours at a time.

I don't want to get baby used to being in our bed and wondered if doing it the odd time will do any harm? Do babies get used to being between parents and crave it?

There doesn't seem to be a pattern of wanting this forming, but I'd like to know if it's ok to do every now and then without baby wanting it all the time?

Thank you all most for the great tips.

I meant no offence whatsoever and in 'harm' - I think it's just the way I speak. As in 'one glass of wine never did anyone any harm' not 'I think I'm going to go out with a knife and harm someone tonight' - hope that makes it clear :)

So I guess I'm an 'occasional' co-sleeper - if I need a tag.

But thanks again to those who have offered the friendly advice I was after.

I'll have a tonight - no harm in that

i agree with the over reaction part it was uncalled for and slightly talking down o the op

cheers to that

No you don't need a tag at all, imo it's the fact that the tag exists that makes the problem in the first place.

I think that that's what some folk were trying to say.

E.g. I quite like porridge but sometimes go right off it. If I had to IDENTIFY myself as a porridge-eater (if such a tag existed, and with the scary HYPHEN too which makes it something MORE OFFICIAL) I would get narked and retreat... as actually I would not choose to eat porridge that often. Lovely though it is.

So I think others were saying that it's quite irritating that people have decided that co-sleeping is a THING and make you feel you have to decide whether you're 'doing it' or not. When actually it is just your baby coming in for a cuddle and sometimes sleeping in your bed if they need that extra closeness or reassurance. For other people yes they do sleep together all the time. Up to them how they make the transition to the child sleeping in their own bed, I've heard good stories and difficult ones (like every aspect of child-rearing).

One fact remains that young children sharing a bed with parents is the norm in many cultures. Early separate beds is the anomaly, historically.

Personally I would always prioritise making it clear to a young child that they can come to you for reassurance and assistance at any time of the day or night, and feel that this approach is likely to lessen a 'fear' of sleeping alone, or having their own room, just by giving them (ultimately) self-confidence.

Fwiw dd is 15 months. I have always done this, when shes ill or teething she just wants mummy and nothing else will soothe her so i pop her in bed with me. She still prefers her cot on nights she's not ill and normally won't settle anywhere else other than the cot.

OP I bring DD (18 months) into bed with me if she is poorly and she always goes back to sleep in her own bed with no problems.

my 3 girls,breastfed,all slept with us from day 1,not between us.we all slept long and well. the cot was beside the bed,and after a few weeks the baby was tucked up in the cot when she was asleep.a gradual process to last feed then cot.the answer is not to fret about stuff.follow your instincts.xx