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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Would you find it weird if your mother...

19 replies

MrsHuxtable · 02/02/2012 20:05

kept googeling your husband?

Because that's what my mother is doing. You probably have to know that she's quite toxic and does loads of inappropriate stuff. Thankfully we don't live in the same country.

It has happened quite a few times now that she asked/ told / informed me on the phone that she has seen on the internet DH has done this or that or that if you google his name there is this or that picture of him coming up. I understand googeling someone out of interest to see what's coming up but she seems to be doing this really frequently now.

I find it rather strange and creepy but don't know if that is because my mum pisses me off in general and I'm therefore a tad oversensitive or if the general consensus would be that this is odd.

Also, when she visited us the last time and behaved like an utter lunatic she was using my laptop to access the internet and afterwards she was asking me this weird questions about when DH had been hiking with his friend etc. At first I didn't know what she was on about but later realised that she must have gone through my document files as there were pictures of DH on said hike. She can't have known from any other source as it was just a day out a couple of years ago, so would never have been mentioned etc.

Is it me or is this very strange behaviour?

OP posts:
mumatron · 02/02/2012 20:12

Very odd.

But I am intrigued about who your DH is to have so much stuff on google Grin. If you were to google my dp you would get a twitter account and a cringeworthy newspaper story from about 15 years ago

How does your dh feel about her doing this?

PomBearAtTheGatesOfDoom · 02/02/2012 20:15

My DH has a really really common name and googling brings up about 100 more famous ones before anything that might be him appears. I don't think my mother would bother though - in fact I don't think it would ever occur to her Confused
If your mother is already a bit weird though, perhaps it's just that it's easy to do, only takes a minute, and she dreams of catching him out in his secret double life as Simon Cowell so she can tell you all about it and be the Instrument of his Downfall as she screeches Leave the Bastard Grin
Maybe make a nice website and put some nice juicy stuff on there for her to see? or a blog....

FeedZombieEatSmartie · 02/02/2012 20:17

Yeah, that would freak me right out!

Is she trying to find some kind of 'dirty secret' he has or something?

I'd tell her to stop, or at least ask why.

YANBU

marriedinwhite · 02/02/2012 20:17

Sometimes I google my husband to find what he's up to and he's not even on facebook or anything like it. He's more likely to use a dictaphone than a computer! My mother can't use a mobile phone let alone a pc.

MrsHuxtable · 02/02/2012 20:20

Haha, Dh is noone special and there isn't a lot of stuff about him. He's only a PhD student who also teaches at uni and has recently started publishing a lot of stuff as his thesis topic is quite a hot subject at the moment so he has academic profiles and gets mentioned in relation to proper well-known academics. My mum doesn't really speak English so she can't actually read what he writes which makes it even stranger imo.

DH asked me to ask her to stop as he finds it creepy but I don't really want to say anything to her as apparently "I'm always mean to her" when pointing out her latest ridiculous behaviour. She also accused me not to long ago of manipulating DH against her as apparently she can sense (without actually talking to him) that he doesn't like her anymore.

OP posts:
JustHecate · 02/02/2012 20:20

Have you asked her?

"Why are you obsessed with my husband?"

IvyAndGold · 02/02/2012 20:20

Definitely strange. If she has a history of being a toxic cowbag however, I wouldn't find it too unbelievable. Does DH know she's doing it? Sounds like she is relishing the idea of being the bearer of bad news Confused

JustHecate · 02/02/2012 20:21

X post.

I was kidding but she actually does sound obsessed with him.

Does she fancy him?

IvyAndGold · 02/02/2012 20:22

That's exactly what I was about to ask next Hecate!

MrsHuxtable · 02/02/2012 20:25

Haha, I like the idea of putting some weird stuff online for her to find but then so could everyone else who might bother to google him for professional reasons. His name is not very common, so he comes up first thing.

I don't think she's trying to find any "dirt" on him. She seems more obsesses ina very weird way but again I don't trust my own judgement there as I find her so inappropriate in general.

In case anyone remembers this, my mum is also the one who kept walking about in her underpants in front of DH when she visited us last.

OP posts:
2rebecca · 02/02/2012 20:27

I sometimes google myself, husband, son and daughter, exhusband, sibs, just out of nosiness to see the sort of things we do that catch the public eye. It's easier if you have a weird name. If you ask her to stop she'll just stop telling you about it.

Gay40 · 02/02/2012 20:27

Mrs Huxtable, I still haven't forgiven your mum for taking the hot water bottle off your cat. So no, you are NOT being unreasonable, she is very strange. And needs avoiding.

JustHecate · 02/02/2012 20:28

oh yes! Now I remember!

I think we can safely say she has a bit of a 'thing'

How did he resist the intoxicating sight of her waist high grey scruds? Grin

MrsHuxtable · 02/02/2012 20:30

I have no idea if she fancies him but he surely is the golden boy in her eyes who can do no wrong while I'm the awful bitch. When she was here the last time, she left a card addressed only to DH that said "To a very special boy" and she's told me before that "the worst women always get the best men" and DH is always "poor poor MrHuxtable" because he does housework and is expected to insert normal activity...

OP posts:
JustHecate · 02/02/2012 20:31

Oh yes. She fancies him. Grin

IvyAndGold · 02/02/2012 20:32

Definitely.

MrsHuxtable · 02/02/2012 20:36

Grin This is getting better and better! I wish I could tell her to get a life!

Gay40 DH also has not forgiven my mum for the hot water bottle. In fact, it's the exact reason why he doesn't like her anymore!

OP posts:
Xmasbaby11 · 02/02/2012 21:46

Maybe she's just interested in his life? Yes, it is too much, but she may just be prod of his achievements, whether she can understand all she reads.

LesserOfTwoWeevils · 02/02/2012 22:54

Very odd. My toxic mother googles me pretty often.

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