I was with my husband for 11 years, loving step-parent to his two children (almost full time) for our whole relationship and put a superhuman amount of effort, love and time into whole thing. He proposed, then retracted his proposal but we did eventually get married. I was clear before entering the relationship that I would like children very much and he said that that would be OK, although he wasn't very keen. As our relationship progressed (after marriage) he started saying he didn't want children, by which time I was hurtling through my 30s. I felt rejected, both in terms of the grudging marriage and children. I then met someone and left my husband with a man for whom marriage and babies with me would be, in his words, better than winning the lottery ten times over. It was very painful to end it with my first husband, who is devastated. I am now very happily planning my wedding to my new partner. I recently sent out 'save the date' emails and one friend, who is close to my ex, has said that he will come to the evening do but not the day. I am livid - surely either he is my friend and wishes me well, or he does not (out of loyalty to my ex)? AIBU to feel like saying that on that basis, he should not come at all? Sorry for being long-winded.