So are we unreasonable not to do this?

[jester68]

Just wondered what general opinions are on this.

It is a friend's child's birthday today. The dad has taken the day off work as it is his child's birthday. Even though the child will be at school all day.

I was asked whether my OH takes the day off when it is our children's birthdays. I said no. Maybe when the eldest was a preschooler and we only had her he might have taken the day off and we would go somewhere for the day. He was also in a job then when he could take his holidays any time he wanted.

Fast forward to now. My oh has a job that has shut downs. So he has the june half term off, 2 weeks in the summer, and some time over Christmas plus bank holidays.

He gets one floating day a year which he can have off when he likes.

So my eldest birthday is on a saturday this year so he is obviously off anyway.

But would you normally take the day off work for a birthday even if the child is at school all day?

Feel guilty now as he wont be off for youngest birthday in May which falls in the week.

So what do you all do?

It would never occur to me to take my child's birthday off work. And I work for myself!

I wouldn't take the day off. I'd celebrate after school. Seems pointless, especially if the child's at school.

Holidays are too precious (needed for school holidays!) to take them off for birthdays. You can have a lovely day before/after school and a special treat at the weekend to celebrate said birthday.

You don't need to feel guilty.

Nope - don't get it either!

Probably why I still get excited when my birthday falls on a weekend!

It wouldn't even occur to me that either working parent should take a day off for a birthday.

It would never occur to me either, my dad certainly never did this! We had a special 'birthday tea' when he got home.

You could go for a day out on the nearest weekend, surely?

My DH usually tries to come home early for my DCs birthdays (now 7 and 10) and by early I mean about 5ish. But if work commitments won't allow it then tough. He has never been to a school concert, sports day, or other event during school hours because it is not possible. He commutes to London each day and the train situation would mean having to take a whole days leave for each event and he doesn't get enough holiday to do that. THe kids understand and accept that this is how it is.

I did when DD was younger - her dad did too. Birthday has fallen on weekend for past two years and next year she will be at school. Neither of us will be taking the day off...

Nope dont take the day off for mine my oh or my DC's

Yanbu

Nope, don't even understand why you would, especially if they're at school.

I've actually never heard of either parent taking a day's annual leave for their school age child's birthday before, especially if the child will be in school.

I have no issue with it, and wouldn't let it dictate my choices.

So, erm... its up to you.

In our house, any birthday gets extended to the weekend anyway.

Ha ha! What on earth would you take the day off for if your child isn't even going to be there?

I would send DH off to work, DC to school, and then cut a cake in the evening when they are all back. Don't feel guilty, it's ridiculous to take your one floating day off for no good reason - get him to take it on your anniversary instead, that way you can spend a child-free day shagging in bed together!

DS is only 1 and his birthday was on a weekend so no issues, birthday 2 will be on a monday which is the only day of the week he goes to nursery.. to be honest we'll prob all have the day off work/nursery (even though it'll still cost us £40!) and go somwhere or make a day of it. Birthdays are for being spoiled IMO! Especially if you're a child!

My Dh always books his own birthday off and usually spends a day doing exactly what he wants, when he wants. Which is fair enough!

Ex used to try to take the week off when he worked away, if he couldn't then I would as I worked long shifts. But anybody working 'normal' hours - I'd say wouldn't, in my experience.

i do get dh to take day off for bdays but ours are preschool age

sent too soon! oops!

but i doubt we'll still do this once he's at proper school!

UANBU
DH please try and be back in time for birthday tea is as far as it goes.

Certainly not once they're at school.

DD's birthday is tomorrow and I'm not off.

Birthday tea with cake and candles and party on the weekend (she had hers last weekend)

What on earth would you DO all day?

you have nothing to feel guilty about!

Completely fair enough to do it on your own birthday Folkgirl

YANBU nor are YBU. Each to their own.
This year my DDs birthday is on Saturday. DH is dithering about whether to fly over for it. He seems to be put off by the idea of 11 X 11 YO girls having a sleepover at once. I can't imagine why.

Squeaver - bake a fantastic cake, have sex in the afternoon, go to the cinema, have champagne & congratulate yourselves on getting to whatever age the child is celebrating

My eldest is lucky as she is having a party on her birthday. The youngest is sort of lucky as the week following her birthday OH has off anyway so we will do some day trips etc. So we will get to spend time together but just a little later!

Thanks for the answers. Was just unsure what is the norm!

And like I said he did occassionally take the day of for our eldest birthday and we would go out for the day. But even if he did take the youngest's birthday off to go out for the day would then have to take the older one out of school for the day if we wanted to go out.

We will keep on as we are. I will just try and make sure he is working morning shift when it is little one's birthday so he can come back for a birthday tea and some cake!