I am not a native English speaker, so apologies for any mistakes. Ok, I need some help because I don't know how to deal with this.
I have been with my DP for 5 years, no children (yet...). We have been through many ups and downs but in general I would say that our relationship is a happy one. I love him and I know he loves me too.
In 2009, I had strong suspicions that he was cheating on me, or at least that he was seeing someone else. I never had proof of this so I could not confront him with just my "sixth sense".
Reasons I believed he was seeing someone: we usually tell everything to each other. If he goes out with a mate, he'll tell me who it is and where they'll be, what time he guesses he'll be back (roughly) etc. It became weird when he started going out without telling me; I would phone him and he would either switch it off or hang up after I had asked him where he is and when he'll be back. etc and then would not pick up again.
I assume they broke up after a while (6-8 months) because things went back to normal. Ever since, things have been great with the usual problems couples have.
At the weekend my mobile phone went dead and because of my job I need to be reachable 24/7. DP let me have his old handset to use until I managed to go to the shop and have mine replaced. I went through his old mobile and found old texts that he had received from friends and some were mine, and I was just having a laugh reading them until I saw one particular text. The date is sept. 2009 and the name of the sender were just initials so again no proof and it read: "I have the best time with you especially when TheQueen calls, as I could die laughing at her" (rough translation - it was written in my language).
Again this does not prove anything. Our relationship has been great ever since that period in 2009. The text is 2 and 1/2 years ago. I don't think it would be reasonable of me to confront with it. What hurts is not whether he cheated on me or not; that I can never prove. But it's that someone was having fun at my expense in his presence. I assume he allowed it otherwise that person would never dare do such thing. I don't know what he replied to this person, whether he put them in their place or laughed along. But that is such a long time ago. Do I say something? If so, how do I approach the issue? I don't want to end the relationship, but I want him to know that I know and that it hurt me without causing a scene. I don't like shouting and screaming.
(I know I should not have gone through his texts but it was his old handset and most texts were from me anyway and he gave me the handset and the pin so prob forgot he had not deleted texts...)
Sorry for length and thanks for your replies.