To feel disappointed with relatives for "forgetting" my sons birthday?

[VivaLaSativa]

Ds1 Was 3 on Sunday. Am I being unreasonable to feel miffed and a bit disappointed that he didn't get a single card from any of my family?

He did receive cards from dp's family, they live a few hundred miles away, Some of our relatives live literally a stones throw and he didn't receive a single birthday greeting from any of them.

I know it makes little difference to him as he is only three, but I do find it quite for my dc as other children in the family are never "forgotten".

So AIBU to let this piss me off a bit?

Depends which relatives.

Your siblings/ parents - YANBU

and other relatives - YABU

No, I would be very pissed off too, especially as DP's family sent and yours didn't. Perhaps because his family live further away they make the effort more and as your's live close by and I'm presumming see DH more often, feel they don't have to. Do they give your DS christmas presents? If they do, maybe they feel as it's close to Christmas they have done their bit. If it were me, I think I would mention it to my family 'Did you realise it was DS birthday on Sunday' or 'DS was disappointed not to get cards from you as he got some from his other grandparents'.
You say 'other children in the family are not forgotten' so have they 'forgotten' your child's birthday in previous years?

sorry meant I presumme living close by they see your child more than the inlaws do..

YANBU. It is a bone of contention in our family too. I always make sure cards (and presents too) arrive on time. And I always text/phone/email or whatever to wish them happy birthday on the day. We live hundreds of miles from all of our relatives (). I'd say about 90% of birthday cards for any of us arrive late. And presents arrive weeks/months later for some reason. Really really winds me up. I don't let my DC know it's an issue for me but I think they will get to an age when they're wondering why they're always opening birthday cards and presents from certain people long after their birthdays...

Thank you for the replies,
blacklashes what you said resonated with me, Dp's relatives do make more effort than my family, I know its close to christmas but you can get cards for pennies or free if you make them.

We always make an effort for all the children in our family, I don't expect the same effort back at all, Just a card would have been nice. Failing that maybe a phone call. They don't make much effort to see the Dc's, once a fortnight for half an hour at a push.

YANBU it hurts doesn't it. My daughter is now 18 and only ever receives a card from my parents. None of my siblings bother and neither do any of her paternal family (including her father in that).

It's not that I think YABU but it's a very tall order remembering loads of birthdays. We're not great at it but the relatives involved know that we love their kids, we see each other not regularly but as much as possible and we'll be there for them whenever they need it as best we can.

bollocks to remembering - just get a birthday calendar!

No way... then it would all fall into MY lap and a big NO TA to that! I guess I like to be appreciated for myself rather than my ability to send cards

It's about showing that you're thinking of them though isn't it? And if people don't acknowledge the birthday (whether through a card or visit or phone call or whatever) then they're clearly not thinking about that person. I don't remember birthdays (that would never happen!) but I do have them all written down. It's not that difficult to send a card a few days before.

This really bugs me with my family (certain relatives in particular). Especially when they'd go ballistic if I ever forgot their birthdays!!

Did you remind them as it was getting nearer?