To expect my friends not to make snide comments

[Jbop]

About me and DH being vegetarian?

We "converted" about a year ago on mainly ethical and environmental grounds. I will answer questions about why I am veggie if asked but am conscious not to seem preachy as know how annoying that is.

Last night we went to friends for dinner. Mutual friends (also attending) gave us a lift there. As the hosts have a young baby we came to the agreement that each couple would make a course each.

Knowing that some of our meat eating pals find doing veggie food a bit of a pain we offered to cook the main and DH and I spent most of the afternoon cooking various dishes.

Prior to the evening there were the usual jokes about stashing peperami in pockets to get through a meat free meal, and how we were going to make mung bean and lint surprise. Ha ha ha etc.

We get in the car to set off and our friend makes a comment about having to stock up at the butchers on emergency meat earlier in the day. I laugh it off.

During the meal we are asked the usual question - do you think you'll always be vegetarian? And if you have kids will they be vegetarian? Which our friend (the host) asks us every time we eat together. This was accompanied by remarks about how she feeds her baby meat every day so he's healthy and how sickly her friend's kid looks (who - you guessed it - doesn't eat meat)

It's been a year now and I'm bored and to be honest quite upset by this. I feel like telling them how much their constant comments offend and piss me off.

These are meant to be our closest friends. And I'm not even going to start on MIL's comments about it...

Am I being ridiculously over sensitive?

They liked the food we cooked...

(long time lurker, first time poster so please be gentle...)

Next time they start I'd just say 'Haven't we had this conversation?', smile sweetly, carry on eating and leave it to them to pick another topic of conversation...

Maybe they find it funny that you don't eat meat on ethical grounds but don't have a problem using things made with the left-overs of the meat industry?

We must all know the same middle-aged man. I was a vegetarian for a long time, and only one person ever tried to wind me up on it - the carrot-screaming middle-aged twat!

No-one else was particularly interested. If I did a dinner for friends they more interested in the banter and booze anyway.

What did you cook?

I am meat eater but i don't understand the 'problem' with dinner parties, nobody died because of one meat free meal.

We eat beans/lentils 2-3 times a week, fish 3, and meat 1-2. I prefer spinach lasagne to meat one.

I would tell them that it upsets me.

YANBU. I was veggie for years and a vegan for 6 years and frankly think I got bullied out of it by people (family) being snide, as I got tired of it. I regret not going back to vegetarianism, so you have inspired me a bit to getting back to something I know is healthier and better for me and the planet. I always found it extraordinary how defensive people got when they found out I was vegetarian/vegan. Like they thought i was making a direct attack on THEM, when usually I was just trying to stuff my face.

Have just made a gorgeous macaroni and cheese for a quick Sunday supper. Yum.

Have no advice, but I like the eye rolling and comment of 'deja vu'.

I'm a vegetarian, have been for twenty years.

Dh and dd aren't. It's a choice that I made and it suits me.

YANBU. I think it would annoy me having to explain myself to close friends (of all people) over and over again.
Can't they grasp it? Vegetarianism isn't 'new'. Some people really do have itty bitty minds.

What is wrong with people?! I just do not get this issue that so many people seem to have with others being vegetarian or with having to "get through" a meal without meat!!!! It is absolutely bizarre! I would be extremely pissed off it I were you OP. I had a veggie partner for 10 years and by default was mostly veggie myself for that time. Luckily, in our circle it was very common but I have heard lots of people make the kinds of comments that you refer to. YANBU, it is really, really annoying. Not sure how to advise though.

Just blithely say "Did you know that X millions of Indians (Hindu) are vegetarian? A whole country can't be wrong..."

And change the subject.

I know someone who's been vegetarian all her life - spat out meat as a toddler - and has the most energy of anyone I know....

For a long time I have avoided red meat for health reasons. Everyone is kind and sympathetic about it. (Apart from the middle aged man.)

I do wonder though if I said, 'It's for ethical reasons,' would they turn on me?

Odd world.

DH and I have both been veggie all our lives-one of the reasons I married him and we have a 13 month old DD. She is a v. healthy, active, and strong little person. And we're non-drivers so we get it on all sides. YANBU.

Cooking for veggies is so simple I can't understand why people make such a big deal out of it. Now a gluten free diet is trickier ...........

just serve
macaroni cheese
spanish omlette
ratatouille
frittata
and a few other dishes that we meat eaters consider normal and tell them to grow up

I used to do after the pub parties and the vegan pizza was always all gone before the vegans had dragged themselves out of the pub because I'm a good cook

Oh Gosh, that reminds me of one of our fave vegan summer suppers... we used to make ratatouille, then leave it in the fridge over night so it is cold and have that, crusty baguette and steamed green beans with walnut sauce (walnuts, garlic clove, oliveoil all blitzed in a blender) and icy cold Sancerre.

mmmmmm........ [greedy]

I've been vegetarian for 31 years, DH for 25 years, The DC are not, they can decide when they are older.

What really makes me is when people waft meat/chicken/fish under my nose and say "oh, I bet you'd really like this" as though I'm going to leap on the food like a tigress. It's my choice, if I wanted to eat meat I bloody well would.

Just rise above it OP, it's pure jealousy on their part.

In southern India you have a whole menu then at the bottom a tiny "non vegetarian" option which you would be wise to avoid. My vegetarian friend loved travelling there she was the norm and the meat eaters the oddities.

YAsoNBU sounds horrid. And weird about half our social circle are vegetarian its a non issue. Though was slightly put out when had made sure I did a vegetarian dish for one professed vegetarian at a dinner party then saw her scoffing a hot dog at the school fete.

All I can say is that I think they really need to get more if they keep going on about something like this Vegetarianism is hardly something radical these days.