not to do maths with dd1?

[bytheMoonlight]

She's only four. Her (lovely) nursery teacher gave me some fab maths ideas to play with her eg adding sweets up in each pocket. I know she's young so doesn't need to know any of this now but I can't see it changing.

But although I love reading to her, showing her how to write letters etc, I really cannot abide maths. I can find no joy in it and find it difficult to enthuse about it to dd1.

It's strange because I love doing everything else with her eg baking, crafts, singing, reading. But when it comes to maths, I cannot even bring myself to explain the simplest of sums to her. I am ashamed of this it has to be said.

I know she's young so doesn't need to know any of this now but I can't see myself changing,AIBU to let school handle maths forever or will she suffer from my lack of imput?

Sorry that's a bit mixed up, dd2 was climbing all over me! Hope it makes sense

I am exactly like that when it comes to maths!

I'm lucky in that ds1 is extremely good at maths, as is ds2, although ds2 occasionally needs help so ds1 steps in.

YANBU!

Well I won't actually say it out loud to her. Nor will I give off a negative vibe towards the topic. Or ignore any requests for help re homework.

But I mean if I don't do it with her of my own accord

I think yabu if your dd is interested then you will have to do it with her, its part of learning just as much as the literacy stuff. You would not want her to pick up on your attitude about maths.
Cant you incorporate it into something you enjoy like baking, there is loads of potential for maths in baking

Oh, and you are doing maths with your dd if you do baking. Just show her the scales and the numbers on the recipe

Talk about the really simple suff like 'heavier' or 'less than', and you are doing numeracy skills.

Well when she is of the age, say years 2 and upwards when she gets maths homework she is going to need your help whether you want to give it or not so yes YABU if you are not going to do it with her.

I hate maths but DS (year 5) gets maths homework, we sit down together and I talk him through anything he doesnt understand. The teachers can only do so much, there HAS to be a support network at home too.

Sadly we cant pick and choose what we like to do all the time.

I do show her the numbers on the scales and do counting up to 30 with her.

But sums etc - sigh, I just can't get motivated about it

X posts kitchen roll!

no yanbu in my opinion

you don't have to enthuse about it though, and you don't have to go out of your way to do maths learning activities with her.
but it does benefit them, imo, if you do things like letting her count some money out in the shop, or reading amounts and adding them up when you do baking etc.

just add it into things you're doing already

when she is at school then you WILL have to help her with homework, so it might be worth just having a think about that and maybe trying to change your own attitude from "i don't like maths" to "i can help DD with maths when I need to"?

If your books have page numbers she could find which page you were on from last time?

Definitely maths in baking too; halving/doubling recipes. She could be responsible for the egg counting!

As I said I'm not going to refuse to do homework with her.

Bit for example, I find it easy to grab a piece of paper and say to her 'lets practice writing the letter g'. I can't seem to being myself to do sums etc with her though.

Lots of the maths a Primary school age child needs to learn can be taught through things that many parents will do anyway:

Playing snakes and ladders or other board games that involve counting.
Paying for things in shops - either real shops or play shops.
Saving up pocket money to buy a toy.
Measuring and weighing out ingredients.
Using ratio to work out quantities when cooking.
Playing with bath toys to work out capacity.
Wrapping presents involves approximating surface area.
Going to catch a bus involves understanding time and time tables.
Riding a bike can be used to teach speed and distance.

So you could do lots of things without having to sit down and do sums. Doing sums is still useful though. If you doubt your own ability to teach it, buy the Carol Vorderman books.

that's ok, i don't think kids need any kind of formal learning like that at home anyway. unless they're asking to

But even the 'if I have x amount of sweets in this pocket game and x amount in this pocket I struggle to teach.

I would let the school handle it, surely no need for you to be involved with any academic subjects unless you're homeschooling or she needs the extra tutoring for some reason and you want to provide it yourself.

Even with homework, shouldn't your role be more about making sure it's done, reminding/supervising if necessary etc, rather than actually 'doing it with her'? Playing games, working out change etc all sounds good of course.

Would be careful not to let her pick up on your negative feelings about maths though.

If I didnt sit down with my DS and do homework with him I really wouldn't have a clue as to how he is progressing. He comes across as a really clever confident little boy but getting down to the nitty gritty...he isnt at all. He needs us to do stuff with him at home and I need to keep a close eye on how he is doing...he's already at the age that when I ask him what he did at school that day the answer is "nuffink"

OP I think you've given up on this before you've even started.

What clothesofsand says. Maths is all around us, especially in the things you enjoy: baking, crafts, singing. It's more important that you see the maths in the things you already do and point those out than you take a conscious effort to practise sums with her.

OP, I do understand your predicament. I am the same with English. Many people seem to have some natural understanding of what is required for secondary school English and so teach their child it without even realising they are doing so. I am bewildered by the whole thing.

If you really feel totally lacking in confidence in teaching maths, I think you will have to get books and do it from those.

But as others have said, some people do think it is better to leave it to the school and have had success doing that. I don't feel that way. I think my children's education is my responsibility and the school assists me in that, not the other way around. But it is certainly perfectly valid to let the school direct you.

Do you enjoy reading DD bedtime stories? Because there are loads of math picture story books (where math concepts are presented as stories with characters) There are entertaining, fun, and if DD doesn't understand them completely doesn't matter you are exposing her to math in a fun way. one here for e.g. Also I do think most children unless they are naturals at math need some one on one personal reinforcement apart from school. I would try going through the very early cpg books or Bond maths in advance bit by bit.

This may help

www.guardian.co.uk/science/2012/jan/23/how-learn-love-maths

The world is full of maths. You don't need to sit down and do lessons, just use life - cooking, shopping, normal games, setting the table, ...whatever. Noone can choose not to do maths, it's an intricate part of the universe. (And required in basically every single job.)(And helps you not get ripped off.)

YANBU, as long as you don't mind if when your Dd is 14 she turns to you and says "sums etc - sigh, I just can't get motivated about it"

You don't need to do sums with a 4 year old just show her numbers when you are doing other things eg baking etc. However, in my work I've had to read a lot of research on maths ability and it all shows that the most important factor in success is confidence. If your child thinks they can do maths they will be fine, if they get the message that maths is hard then they will struggle. Seriously I can't emphasise this enough - use every opportunity to get your DC looking at numbers and recognising them and you will give her a huge gift.