About DCs being owed Christmas presents from their aunty and uncle

[drcrab]

DCs are nearly 4 and 16 months. Before Christmas dh's brother's wife texted him to say that they will post Christmas presents after Christmas. No reason why. We said sure.

It's the 24 January. No present has arrived. I don't care for the present as such (kids have too much crap anyway) but it's the act I suppose.

Should I send her a text asking her nicely whether she's posted it (maybe nasty mr postman) has stolen it?!!) or should I leave it? I worry that she thinks we're being rude and not saying thank you. Dh wants nothing of it. He was communicating with his brother recently (way after Christmas) and there was no mention.

I think you should leave it, don't ask it sounds a bit rude imo asking for a present - I've still got a present sat here I was suppposed to post, I've been busy and haven't made it to the post office but if I was asked about it it would annoy me!!

I'd leave it - there is nothing to be gained by mentioning it tbh

I'd leave it. Maybe your BIL was being hopeful that they would get something for your DCs in the sales but then found they couldn't afford it. I think you would sound a bit grabby to ask if it has been posted.

Leave it. It would be criminally rude to text and ask about presents. "graspy and grabbing"

However, if you are in the manner of phoning, you might work the conversation round if you have the dexterity without appearing abrupt and grasping

I think if she'd had sent something she would, by now, have asked if the children liked their presents.

Erm.... tbh, nobody owes anyone presents....

I'd always mention it, but that was after a cheque for me got lost in the post and the elderly aunt who'd sent it didn't say. I didn't know to expect it, she thought I'd had it and hadn't bothered to say thank you but didn't like to ask. She eventually mentioned it to my mother at a family do I couldn't attend. Someone helped her go through her statements to reassure her it hadn't been stolen and cashed (it hadn't) - she gave cash to my mum instead to pass on and cancelled the cheque. It turned up eight months later. Same thing happened to the same aunt with my sister that Christmas - that cheque hasn't surfaced (four years later).
Now, if I post anything, present, cheque or whatever, I always phone and make sure people have received it if I don't hear. And I always phone and let someone know if something has turned up. I don't trust the post and if I'm expecting something I'd always ask, just in case. You can find ways of phrasing it that don't sound entitled, especially if it's family.

Ok. Except that she said in that same stream of texts that there was something for us for housewarming... So it sounded like she'd already got that thing whatever it is.

Dc1's birthday is coming up too in February. Maybe she'll send it altogether.

Thanks for your opinions. I will leave it.

Wasn't meant to sound entities or grasping. Couldn't think of another word that means the same thing... Ie something that should have arrived but didn't and yet promised.

Yes when we send things I will usually send a message or call the recipient to say it's on the way. Or we'd call a few days later and say did you get it?

Have a quick google for 'Angard' to see what happened at Royal Mail this Christmas. Basically they decided to set up their own agency to take on Christmas temps and monumentally cocked it up and ended up with tens and thousands of temporary workers who were not paid for WEEKS before Christmas. As a result both before and after Xmas many of said temps appear to have 'liberated' quite a bit of post. Anecdotally there appears to have been a huge rise in thefts over this period.

It is completely possible it's been stolen in the post, a lot of stuf has been.