...to want to get engaged...

[Boomerwang]

... so that I can stop referring to my boyfriend as 'my boyfriend' and rather 'my fiance'?

'Boyfriend' sounds so... childish? 'Partner' sounds too anonymous. Could be a woman, or that my relationship isn't serious, or that I prefer not to specify. 'Fella' 'Bloke' 'Man' doesn't give the respect he deserves. 'Other half' I feel the same way about as both 'Partner' and 'Fella/Bloke/Man'

I think 'fiance' shows our intention to commit to one another and our baby when it comes along, including the sharing of home, finances, chores, time, energy, family relationships etc...

Or am I outdated/stupid/ignorant/pathetic etc?

I know this is a trivial subject, it's meant to be :)

You should get engaged to show that you are committed to marry one another, not because you don't like the other titles you have available to use for your DP.

You could just ask him of course, and be proactive about it.

I guess what I am also asking is... should I propose to my boyfriend or wait for him to propose to me so that I can be sure he even WANTS to be my fiance?

ooh x post Flisspaps :)

Now I'm mulling over whether I would propose and how I would do it

you can't get engaged beacause the term boyfriend sounds childish

There is nothing wrong with the word partner,only get engaged if you intend to marry though as long engagements are imo silly

call him your better half but think it's time you had that chat then you will know :o

It's a leap year!

I call my husband

'Wor fella'

But I'm proper Geordie
I still chuckle about Stephen fry not getting 'wor drums' - 'thieving bastards' on QI

Agree with above that it's not a good reason to get engaged but just had to say that I always found fiancé quite a camp term and didn't really like saying it!

There's something about "fiancé" said in a certain way that reminds me of Dick Emery.

What's wrong with 'my bit of trouser' or 'my shag piece' as an alternative to boyfriend?

There are a few
Posters who use 'manshape'

Can you say it in Italian instead... "Mi inamorato"...?

I loathe 'other half' more than any other term. Implies that one isn't a complete person in their own right.

What about just referring to him by his name? Removes the need for fiance or boyfriend. Just promise that when you get married... you will NEVER refer to him as your 'hubby'...

I am allergic to the word fiance

DH is an has always been "Him" or "MrScarlett"

I'm your opposite because I prefer the term boyfriend!!! And get told that its silly calling the 43 year old man I live with my boyfriend - he should be a 'partner' but I just think that sounds so rubbish...
(Maybe just clinging on desperately to my youth!)

Lots of ideas. Yes, I know IABU :P

But I AM liking some of the other words suggested here... composhat I can't use those terms considering the other words I've already said I won't use lol lyingwitch I'd have to explain that to people who don't know what it means... same as the word 'manshape' and I would use his real name if people knew who I was talking about, but on this board it'd be difficult.. If I wrote MrBoomerwang it'd imply I was married.

Now... I know he'd instantly say yes if I did ask him to marry me. However, I can't afford a ring (can't even afford milk at the mo, have to learn how to drink tea without it... yerch!!!) so do you think it'd be reasonable to offer a circle of tightly twisted tin-foil?

Also I'd like to surprise him at work and do it but he's a chef so I'd have to sneak into the kitchen somehow... we don't have romantic nights to do it on and I think doing it publicly is nice... hummmm think some more and thank you all for your responses I really appreciate it :D

I'm in similar boat but hate 'fiance' even more than 'partner'.

I refer to DP by his name to people who know us, and to anybody else (tradesmen, shop keepers etc) I call him my husband. It's just easier!

You don't need a ring to get engaged, we couldn't afford one and we were engaged, its an intention to commit and you don't need the ring to prove the commitment.

I know its nice to have something sparkly though

We did get rings eventually, when we got married. Now that we are a bit better off its a shame I don't have a big rock like lots of my friends but I couldn't change my ring now, it means too much.

I did have a lovely engagement ring once but it went back to my ex fiance's mum not long ago. Doesn't mean I have to have a ring, I'd much rather have a kissy lip-biting moment with my ... oh ffs... MANSHAPE!

I've never considered the word 'fiance' to be stuck up or effeminate or anything, just an exciting word that means a marriage and a life together forever is imminent.

Do I sound a knob for using it then?

No, you don't sound like a knob. For every person that thinks it sounds stuck up there will be a person that thinks using 'boyfriend' sounds childish. You can't win so just use whatever you like!

I never use fiancé, it makes me cringe! Feels a bit try hard some how?!

However I know what you mean about 'boyfriend' et al. I'm very much looking forward to saying husband

But agree with others that you can't just get engaged because you don't like the term boyfriend. How about 'manfriend', as an upgrade from 'boy'

Can't afford MILK? You're joking, right?

WeeJimmy Thats a bit unnecessary, isn't it? I was meant to go to toddler group with a friend today but she couldn't afford the £1.20 bus fare to get there so she didn't come. Thats life.

Sorry, was not intending to mock, was concerned actually- OP is pregnant and can't afford basic necessity like milk, surely that can't be right?

What about calling him your "old fruit"? I often refer to my friends' husbands/boyfriends as that, and indeed my DH. Makes people laugh, but works for me! Think I've picked it up from my mother.

I used to refer to my DH as "'im indoors". Now he is XH it's "'im no longer indoors".