To think that contraception is a pain in the ass and it would just be easier to never have sex again?

[lottielou39]

I'm 38 and have a 7 week old daughter who we love to bits. She was conceived despite me being on the mini pill and taking it on time every single day, never missing one or taking it late and no tummy bugs/upset stomachs or antibiotics etc..
We're happy the pill failed because we love her to bits, but arn't keen to have a 4th baby, so I'm looking at contraceptive choices. Neither of us want permanent contraception.
I was all ready to have Mirena fitted, then read loads of horror stories on here about it, including women who've become pregnant with Mirena in. I know no method of contraception is 100%, but with a failure rate of 2 in 100, you wouldn't expect to be one of those two people, would you?
I've thought about an implant, but they get a shocking press too, don't they? Has anyone had an implant and actually got on fine with it? Apparently it's got an amazingly low failure rate (1 in 1000 or something) so I'd feel very confident with this method, if I had no side effects. But I'm too old at almost 39 for the combined pill, so wondering if the same will apply to the implant?
I just don't want to get pregnant again accidentally, am happy with my three wonderful children, but would struggle with any more at the moment.
What do you recommend and WIBU just to abstain instead??!

I feel your pain. Me and DH are in the EXACT same situation. So far sex has been relying on the withdrawla method as we appear to havew had half asleep sex a few times (DS is 9 weeks old - things are not what they were just yet so nothing regular / planned).. if we carry on like this I am sure a little brother or sister will be on the horizon which I don't want just yet.

I hate the pill, dont trust the coil, ballooned on the injection, hate diaphragms, dont want the implant, condoms are a faff and do probably want another dc in the future. But I really like sex :(

Luckily I am too tired to miss it too much right now but.........

I have a mirena and am really really happy with it. No periods, but no side effects either. No weight gain (have dieted and lost 4 stones since having it in). And 99.9% effective not 98% as you suggested. Ok it doesn't suit everyone but suits me.

No problems here with implant, I'm on my third. No weight gain, no more PMT than usual, periods rare and painless.

If you've previously got on well with the minipill (apart from your adorable little side-effect) then your odds of getting on well with the implant are presumably better than average. I'd definitely try it in your position.

And whilst condoms are frequently a good option, for somebody who really doesn't want a child and will not use abortion as a back-up, they're just not reliable enough.

I had an implant and it was bloody awful. Bleeding constantly for weeks after fitting and I was a complete cow to live with apparently. Maybe I shouldn't have had it 8 weeks after I gave birth. It wasn't until I read more and more stories about the mood swings that I considered that this was causing it. I'd never had children before so I had put it down to that!
Even people at work have commented that I am much easier to work with now too.

The pill made me put on weight so that's off the menu too! I've nearly lost the 4 kg I put on in 6 months of taking it.

I'm on my second Mirena and think its wonderful.

Like any other form of contaception there are people who have had problems. Statistically though, I would have thought you were more likely to be happy with it than not.

Coil. Not everyone gets on with them but most do. Once in you can forget about them. If you want to be doubly sure no harm in using a condom as well!

I think in your situation I'd be going for condoms.

I won't use hormonal contraception ever again. I never had terrible side-effects or anything, but after having DC and then becoming single, I was celibate for a number of years so stopped using contraception. The difference in my cycle and how well I felt generally really surprised me, especially because I hadn't felt I was suffering in any way using the pill or implant.

Obviously your bodies and your choices, but if you have three DC and don't want any more though, why are you and your DP/DH so reluctant to consider anything more permanent? (A vasectomy is so much more simple than messing about with contraception or you having your tubes tied.)

Hope you find a solution and congratulations on your latest DD.

No to permanent contraception because my GP says they wont routinely perform them anymore because women often have problems afterwards with their periods etc. and it's not a priority operation for the NHS.
My husband wont have a vasectomy because he's absolutely terrified of hospitals and doctors etc. to the extent that when he was forced into hospital several years ago after refusing to go to the dentist and getting blood poisoning, he was in a proper state, having full blown panic attacks etc... so whilst I'd love him to have the snip,(and would secretly love to drag him kicking and screaming to the clinic) his body, his choice. And I don't really want to put him through that sort of trauma. I've looked at Essure and not keen.
I'm having Mirena fitted and will also avoid fertile times of the month, even with it in. It's got a better failure rate than the copper coil and I can always have it removed if I have problems.
Thanks for all the comments, they've really helped!

I think you need to look at different types and sizes of condoms. How many have you tried? Sounds like the previous type didn't fit well.

I always check afterwards to see if any semen is leaking out of the condom, and I don't think I've ever had a breakage.

we have used condoms for 17 years and I don't find them a pain in my arse at all

in the arse
oh god!

I love my Mirena, even though I couldn't get on with the mini pill. Wanted something long term but not irreversible, but very reliable. Hardly any bleeding too. I looked at Essure but don't like the sound of it

Had many happy years on the combined pill but was BF my youngest so it wasn't suitable, and now I am too old for it being a dirty smoker .