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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

to expect wealthy young gentlemen to court my 5 dds?

61 replies

GeorgianMumto5 · 23/01/2012 21:55

First post in aibu, inspired by a thread I saw in chat.

I have 5 dds, no dses (feel my pain) and no fortune to speak of. I worry constantly about our future, since dh's estate is to be entailed to a worthless cousin. None of my dds have yet secured the good matches that will secure their and our futures and I cannot rouse my dh to do so much as host one small party to advance their cause. (See my post in 'Relationships'.)

Lest I am later accused of 'aibu by stealth' I shall furnish you all with some background:

Until recently we felt sure that dd1 had made an excellent match. The young gentleman in question was charming, very attentive to dd1 (as I remarked on more than on occasion) and, most importantly, in possession of a small fortune. Unfortunately, due to reasons that are quite beyond me, the young gentleman has recently turned out to be false and has quite broken dd1's heart.

Dd2, well let's gloss over that one, shall we? That child was born to vex me! I did formerly entertain hopes of a match with the aforementioned cousin of dh's but dd2 turned him down (can you believe it?) with scant regard for her mother's nerves. Worse still, the sanctimonius git clergyman cousin has now struck up with dd2's 'best friend'.

Dd3. I'm afraid I have very much given up on that score. If the child would perhaps take her nose out of a book and into the gaze of a wealthy gentleman, I would write more on the subject.

Dd4. Reminds me very much of myself at her age. She is yet too young to consider a match but of course I make sure that she attends parties and the like. It's good to get oneself out there, I always say!

Dd5, dear, sweet girl and such good company! If Dd4 reminds me of my younger self, dd5 is my younger self! She and I share a fondness for young gentlemen in regimentals. I am sure we shall make a lady of dd5 yet!

So, aibu? What my dds lack in financial matters, they more than make up for in charm and sophistication, as I was telling my neighbour only the other day. Why then do the young gentlemen hereabouts cease to call upon us?

OP posts:
BelleDameSansMerci · 23/01/2012 21:56

YANBU but do make sure DD5 remembers to tuck some lace...

Tigresswoods · 23/01/2012 21:56

YANBU.

Grin
troisgarcons · 23/01/2012 21:57

Sorry bored after two lines. The take-a-break in the Docs surgery holds my attention more.

Irishchic · 23/01/2012 22:00

YANBU Mrs Bennett!

mynewpassion · 23/01/2012 22:01

You should hold a ball and invite the local genteel men. You know what they say....you have to spend a bit of wealth to gain wealth.

pourmeanotherglass · 23/01/2012 22:02

Already been done. There were some threads a while back on AIBU books.

Bewilderedmum · 23/01/2012 22:03

Courage Mrs Bennett! :o

GeorgianMumto5 · 23/01/2012 22:03

mynewpassion, if only dh would see it that way! I have asked, I have cajoled, I have pleaded... I have practically begged, ffs, and yet he refuses to even entertin the idea! I know, can you believe it? Very soon we shall all be penniless and it will be all thanks to dh!

OP posts:
Auntiestablishment · 23/01/2012 22:03

You're probably scaring them off. Try to be calm, dignified and not let your tongue run away with you. or DD5 run away with any young men

GeorgianMumto5 · 23/01/2012 22:05

pourmeanotherglass, it is a problem universally acknowledged, surely? 'Already been done' is thus more than likely and scarcely worth comment. Are you, by any small chance, my former neighbour, Charlotte Collins?

OP posts:
loopsylou · 23/01/2012 22:05

Oh Mr Darcy! :o

mojitomania · 23/01/2012 22:15

Of course you do, so would I but underhanded does it Grin

ps. i want the same for my son too

GeorgianMumto5 · 23/01/2012 22:17

mojitomania, is he in possession of a small fortune? Small or large, he is most welcome to attend to my dds!

Auntiestablishment, I must say I do not know to what you are referring.

OP posts:
marriedinwhite · 23/01/2012 22:23

Regrettably OP my one dd had her first kiss with a dear sweet boy when she was 5. Dear sweet boy is now an honbl and his papa a Lord - they are still looking for the loot though but I believe have upgraded to detached Grin. DD meanwhile is a young teen and favours cool. We have, however, been encouraging ds to pant after the liberated daughters of the truly rich. Grin

AtYourCervix · 23/01/2012 22:25

oh we shall all be undone.

Northernlurker · 23/01/2012 22:25

May I advise you to keep an eye on your dd5. Definately no seaside trips for her!
I'm sure it will all end well however.

fruitshootsandheavesupafurball · 23/01/2012 22:27

I suggest you send your second dd down to wander pale and interestingly by a lake and hope for a damp shirted man to emerge from the mist.

GeorgianMumto5 · 23/01/2012 22:29

Oh, but Northernlurker, dd5 has has just advised me of a forthcoming trip to Brighton. How very odd than you should remark upon it! I'm sure no harm can come of it...

marriedinwhite, how very shocking!

OP posts:
SaggyOldClothCatPuss · 23/01/2012 22:35

Dont take on so, dear woman. Let fate and your DDs take their turn.
Circumstances may look bleak, but one never knows what is around the next corner. Dont spare another thought for the perfidious cousin, he is unreasonably ruled by his patroness, and she would have vexed DD2 terribly. Try however to look at other prospects, maybe those gentlemen of high breeding that she professes to hate....
It is said that love and hate are two sides of the same coin!

charleneanna · 23/01/2012 22:40

omg this is a wind up yeah otherwise its something of a saddo from mills and boon books get a grip women its real life not fantasy

BelleDameSansMerci · 23/01/2012 22:43
BelleDameSansMerci · 23/01/2012 22:44

Actually, taking a leaf out of Hully's earlier thread - BANG!

That does feel much better.

SaggyOldClothCatPuss · 23/01/2012 22:45
charleneanna · 23/01/2012 22:46

you feel better for saying BANG ok then

caramelwaffle · 23/01/2012 22:47

Oh, charleneanna my dear...