...to let my DD at 19 months go up and down stairs without me hovering around?

[LizziePizzie]

She has been capable of doing so for a good couple of months. She walks down mostly, but sometimes goes down on her belly feet first. She has walked up and down stairs hundreds of times without any problem. The only reason I ask, is she fell down them this morning and I am feeling a bit guilty.

I usually watch her doing so, but this morning was one of those occassions where I turned my back for 5 seconds and there she goes! She cried, but calmed down pretty quickly and has no bruises, cuts or broken limbs! (Also no sleepy behaviour, blood in the ears or vomiting!)

You've just reminded me

I used to make my kids come down the stairs on their bums

My Mum used to make us do the same as there were no stair gates when I was little (I don't think anyway)

I think what happened this morning should answer your question.

After what happened this morning I think you need to hover about for a bit longer!

I feel your pain OP, I've been in a similar situation

DS was nearly 2 and DD was a couple of weeks old. She'd woken in her downstairs crib and was shrieking merry hell, so had to go downstairs with DS. He was taking forever so I rushed down to get DD - and he fell from the top we weren't as lucky as you though and he needed 6 stitches in his chin

Moral of the story? Hover for a bit longer yet, or insist on them bottom bumping for now

Dd is 19 months and although not walking has been crawling up and down the stairs for about six months. I always follow her because it only takes a second for her to stop concentrating and slip, it only takes up 20 seconds if that.

But, that said, she is your dd and you know her better than anyone. If you feel guilty after her falling it's probably best that you don't let her go down on her own.

Yabu. Keep hovering.

I hope your DD is feeling better now. May be just install two safety gates on your stair (one at the top and one at the bottom) as you don't really want her to fell down the stair again! And also the feeling of guilt is horrible and I doubt you want to undergo that again.....

Yep, you need to keep hovering I'm afraid. My DD is this age and I still hover, I just know she could easily lose concentration and take a step back and fall.

Yanbu, my ds is 18 mnths and for a few months now I have let him go up and down stairs as he pleases, he comes down backwards, he slipped once, but then again my 4 year old has also slipped once in that time, and so has my dh so should I hover for them as well?

I'm quite relaxed about kids finding there own way and suffering minor injuries along the way. But the fact she fell today and that the consequences of falling could be serious I would stick close for now.

Hmm. Will break the messages up by saying DS 22m has free run of our house & has done for some time.

I've now just about stopped hovering over my 18 month old DS on the stairs - we live in a first floor flat with a stairgate at the top so he can't do them unsupervised at home, but when we were away over Christmas (so he was only 17 months) staying with various relations with no stairgates I followed him up and down stairs dozens and dozens of times (or so it felt) and he was absolutely fine, so I stopped worrying too much. The big difference is that he goes down stairs feet first on his tummy, so less risk of falling. I wouldn't let him walk down on his own (he had a nasty bump falling down two steps when he tried to walk down them the other day).

Mine is 18months, she is fine going upstairs but although I have been letting her come downstairs for about a month, she has now got it into her head to try to walk down rather than bump down, so I am hovering again. its all stages I'm affraid. Biggest concern is when 6 year old starts distracting her while she is doing it, so tend to hover more then!
Its all up to how mobile your kid is - some arent walking at this stage, some have been walking for half their lifes.

I didn't hover at that age but it depends on the child, the stairs etc. I remember dd could open the stairgate at 20 months.....just when ds was born

I'd hover a bit longer, but we have steep stairs with flagstone floor at the bottom! Can't do any harm to be better safe than sorry.

I would still hover for now; 19 months is very young. My 2 and a half year old DS isn't totally safe on stairs on his own yet and so I do tend to supervise him on them. Would rather do that than risk a big fall.

Will prob get flames but my 14 month old goes up and down the stairsbyhimself half the time. He crawls up and climbs down on his belly / knees. Used to hove but now hes up after his brother and sister before I realise. We are probably
Ore relaxed as old house it was t possible to put a staircase in so we had to teach my older two fair early on safely going up and down he stairs so have had the same mentality with our youngest although oncehe is ion a bed and not a cot the staircase will go up as do t want him wa seeing around it he night

I would probably teach her to come down on her bottom when she's not with you. It also depends how distracted she normally is or if she normally pays attention. LO here is a daydreamer - so not allowed up & down the stairs unsupervised, but for a generally focussed child being allowed to do it on their own and coming down on their bum is fine.

You've answered your own question. How does it hurt you to stay close to her? How would you feel if she hurt herself more than she did?

My dd is 16 months and there no way on earth I'd let her without me being there anytime soon. She's more than capable and has been walking 6 months and climbing forever but if she heard a noise shed be distracted or if she dropped a toy, bit her lip, anything then shed be distracted and fall. We have hard floors at the bottom too and I'd be pretty worried about a little one falling all that way tbh.

jojane - DD was confident like that at 14 months, but I think the problem is because she has done it so many times on her own that I am too confident to let her. She is getting to the 'cocky' stage, thinking she can do things beyond her ability, or being careless, but like nailak has said, where do you draw the line. I have slipped down the stairs, so I learn to be more careful, so should I let her do the same?

I should say to ouryve, not that this justifys this is any way, but my stairs are carpeted. I ALWAYS watch her on hard stairs (wood, metal or concrete).

My (at the time) 2 yo dd was great at stairs until one day when she fell down just 2 stairs right at the bottom - I don't know what happened because I wasn't watching (i never left her alone on the stairs either!) Anyway we spent all night in a & e with a suspected broken leg - it was awful (she was ok thank goodness). She's 3 now & barely needs to hold on at all but I still hover as much as I can. She must have landed funny but it could have a much sorrier story.

If she's usually fine I would leave her to it. You have to trust them to some extent. My DS was safe on the stairs before he could walk.

i have always been the type of parent who lets her kids climb, run etc without worrying too much. I think i would probably allow my 19mnth old to go up and down stairs on their own if it was in our house and something they did every day. (we have no stairs in ours)

However the only thing that makes me feel a bit wary is when my 3rd child was just 14 months she tumbled off one of those tiny little tykes slides in a soft play area (she had gone up and down maybe a dozen times before this) and she actually managed to break her little arm in two places. They even thought they might have to operate and pin her arm. It was awful.

My kids are very active, they ski, cycle, horse ride etc and i know with all these things there is a risk of injury. But they enjoy these things and no doubt your little one enjoys having freedom to explore their home.

YANBU but maybe for your own peace of mind ask little one to come down on belly feet first for the moment reminding them they don't want another tumble and belly down is safer atm.

I was going to say yanbu as ds has been doing it on his own since before he could walk and has never fallen - comes down on his belly or bum. BUT considering she has recently fallen I would hover a bit longer. DD was well over 2 before she could manage it so it does depend on the child imo.