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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think ELC doll 'head' is an inappropriate gift for four year old...

112 replies

Wolfordwonder · 22/01/2012 19:55

A 'head' lots of blonde hair for 'styling' she has false looking eyelashes and an array of make up. I'm taking it to charity tommorow.

I thought hairdressing apprentice types used these.

I want my four year old to be fuelled on imagination, not Barbiedom.

OP posts:
CailinDana · 22/01/2012 20:47

If you get rid of it then the message you're giving your DD is that what she likes doesn't count and that you want to control her thoughts. Brushing a doll's hair and putting fake make up on her doesn't send any message other than it's fun to brush a doll's hair and put fake make up on her. I couldn't see the point in dolls when I was a child but a lot of my friends had them and loved them. If a DD of mine wanted one I'd get it for her as long as I could afford it, despite never liking them myself. Not all female-oriented things are bad you know, and not all women who are into hair and makeup are beneath you and your children.

ballstoit · 22/01/2012 20:48

YABU. If encouraged to, children can use any toy (or any item come to that) to play with imaginatively.

DD1 (4) has one of these heads. It has been played with in the following ways, mostly with DD and DS (6) playing together, since Christmas when it was bought for her (by her Dad);

  • patient during games of doctors
  • customer in a cafe, with DD being the chef
  • being beheaded during a 'Horrible Histories' game...complete with lipstick smeared around it's neck to be blood [boak]
  • a newsreader, telling a story about a boat sinking (DS was fascinated by the cruise ship sinking)
  • DD and 'the head' being an electrician 'fixing' plugs around the house.

Sometimes I think it's the parent who lacks imagination, not the child.

OldMumsy · 22/01/2012 20:49

Sadly they lurve it..

Moveslikejagger · 22/01/2012 20:50

YABU and a right big spoilsport. I loved mine when I was a kid and DD loves hers too. She also loves cars, boats and a million other things that she uses her imagination with. I really can't be arsed with parents who seem to spend their time with their arse cheeks clenched over a bloody toy that's been around for years and does not seem to be responsible for producing generations of imbeciles.

OlympicEater · 22/01/2012 20:50

DD got a girls world around this age - she loved it and played with it a lot even if she did call it "scary doll head"

entropygirl · 22/01/2012 20:51

You see buying it for a DD/DS that already has interests in hair styling is a lovely way to promote your DD/DS's individuality. Buying it for a girl with no interests in hair styling, when you would presumably never think of buying such a thing for boy with no interests in that area is kinda like yelling CONFORM CONFORM CONFORM in their ear.

Ditch it.

lockets · 22/01/2012 20:52

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

bejeezus · 22/01/2012 20:52

i think it is a good test of how well you are doing in raising your daughter;

give it to her; My dd painted the face black and green and purple with silver glitter and chopped all the hair off;

Grin job done!
LittlePickleHead · 22/01/2012 20:52

I'm thinking about getting one of these for my 3yo as she is currently obsessed with using my hair/head to trial out hairclips and styles. It bloody hurts!

SecretMinceRinser · 22/01/2012 20:58

entropy girl The op hasn't stated whether or not her dd is interested in it. Presumably she is because if she isn't it wouldn't be an issue as it would remain in a cupboard unplayed with.

My DS loves playing with cars so he has a lot - they were actually mostly his older sisters cars that she never really played with. He likes anything with wheels so he also got a doll and pram for xmas which he loves.
DD asked for a Barbie for xmas - and a tub of creepy crawlies.
Preventing your child from playing with stereotypically girly toys if they are a girl (and vice versa for a boy) is limiting them as much as ONLY letting them play with 'girly' toys imo.

TuftyFinch · 22/01/2012 20:59

The doll's head will not ruin her. Really it won't. My 3 yr old DD and 4 year old DS would love this. I let themdo my hair. Bit of water spray, few clips. I do let them cut my hair as well - with safety scissors. The world won't be any worse for it.

FredFredGeorge · 22/01/2012 21:01

It's a blank canvas, it completely relies on imagination to do anything and encourages that the imagination results in something. Do you really want a child who cannot express their ideas 'cos they've never had anything to express it on?

snowmaiden · 22/01/2012 21:01

Are you suggesting hairdressers don't have brains or imagination?

Dozer · 22/01/2012 21:02

I had one of these and chopped all its hair off, thought it would grow back, had it for ages all shorn and choppy. Also drew blue "eyeshadow" on it in marker pen.

It was lovely Grin

HeadfirstForHalos · 22/01/2012 21:05

I loved my girls world when I was little, I am so ungirly now, I'm lucky if I get time to drag a brush through my hair now! Let kids be kids and have some fun. There are years ahead to do all the serious stuff.

Osmiornica · 22/01/2012 21:08

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

SecretMinceRinser · 22/01/2012 21:08

Well as the op hasn't been back we will have to draw our own conclusions at to what they mean by 'hairdressing apprentice types'.
The whole op is actually quite weird. The hair IS designed for styling so I don't know why they say it's for 'styling'. I also assume the eyelashes are false looking because they are actually false - what with them not being real eyes and all. And Barbiedom?????
Can I be the first to suggest that this is a reverse AIBU and the op has actually bought the doll for the child of a friend/relative who has said they can't keep it and they will be taking it to the charity shop?'

neveradullmomentinparadise · 22/01/2012 21:14

Ah, this is so sad. I have had to have serious talks with DH about the fact that the DD's choices of toys (I'm talking here about spending Xmas/birthday money in ToysRUs) are THEIR choices, not ours. At any given age, they've always had a clear idea about what they LOVE and get excited about...which is fine by me, as I think it's great that they have passion about things even at such a young age. It really doesnt matter what those things are....it's their world, not ours. (Believe me, we have some real fucking crap in our house..)

KittyFane · 22/01/2012 21:15

Do you take your DD to the hairdressers OP?

Imaginative play that's all.

KittyFane · 22/01/2012 21:16

I bought DD one of these to stop her brushing my hair :o

kerala · 22/01/2012 21:25

I played endlessly with my girls world and ended up a corporate lawyer...honestly chill out. My friend had one left over from her childhood and our 5 year old DDs played with it for an hour and a half last week am definitely getting one.

RedHotPokers · 22/01/2012 21:25

YABU and need to chill out. Dd got one for her 4th bday and loved it.
It has now become a hairband holder and resembles one of the Levellers. Ds loves playing with it and DH refers to it only as 'the severed head.'

saintlyjimjams · 22/01/2012 21:29

I loved my Girl's World - despite spending the majority of my childhood up trees as a self confessed tomboy, and have worn next to no make up as an adult.

Just let her play with it. It's not going to brainwash her.

Osmiornica · 22/01/2012 21:33

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

TheUnsinkableTitanic · 22/01/2012 21:38

YABU
they are great fun
DS and both DD's love it

they "style" the head, but more often than not, "style" each other :)
hours of endless fun