My mum died a week ago. My older sister is a very committed Catholic having converted when she married 45years ago. She is 10 years older than me. Myself, my brother and younger sister range from vaguely C of E to agnostic as far as religious beliefs go. My mum was not baptised and did not go to church but knew my sister's parish priest Father P. According to my sister, mum had expressed a wish that he would say a few words at the crematorium when she died rather than a stranger doing the service. My sister had always been very bossy and self righteous. She went ahead and organised a church service with this priest without speaking to any of the rest of the family. All three of us detest this priest who is very egotistical and controlling. We decided we wanted to have a humanist celebration of mum's life at the crematorium, after the church service, inviting the priest to say prayers at the committal. we thought this was a good compromise. My religious sister gets her church service and the rest of us get a secular celebration of mum's life to say goodbye. The trouble is the priest has been kicking off big time. He is so hurt! He refuses to take any part in the crematorium service with a humanist etc etc. I even had the funeral director ringing me to tell me off for upsetting the priest! It was only when I reminded him that I was the one who was bereaved and my feelings were more important than some supposedly professional priest who, after all, was being paid to do a job that he wound his neck in and went back into funeral director mode. I have since found out that this priest who was at my sisters house every night when her kids were young used to invite himself on holiday with them and stay in the children's room! WTF! My sister can't see that this guy is weird. She has been abusive and angry because we want the humanist celebration and it's leaving a very nasty atmosphere. I feel bullied but I'm not putting up with it. What is it about people who say they are Christians but then demonstrate the least care and consideration for others? Is it really so bad to want a compromise so that we all say goodbye to mum in a way meaningful to each of us? My siblings and I have no objection to the Church bit as it provides comfort for my sister so why won't she tolerate what we want without becoming abusive and disrespectful? Any religious people out there can you explain?