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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To have a word with the nursery?

179 replies

lauraloveskitsch · 20/01/2012 01:30

DD1 is 3.6 and in nursery five afternoons a week. We got the newsletter yesterday and this term they're learning about animals. They will have a selection of animals coming in provided by parents which the children will learn about and be able to handle.

DH was up there earlier to find the children had already met a big chocolate labrador and tomorrow will meet a ferret.

AIBU to have a word with the nursery? There have been no consent forms given, the newsletter was handed out late and the only people who knew about this are the parents who are bringing animals and are friends outside the school with the teachers.

What if there was an incident? AIBU about this? FWIW I would sign the consent form but I wish I'd been informed and had a choice.

OP posts:
Avantia · 21/01/2012 11:59

God help us then ! Wink

WoollyHead · 21/01/2012 12:00

YABU

4 parents have pulled kids out? Blimey, you have strange parents round your way. I would not expect notice of this sort of activity. It will have been risk assessed, as schools have to do that for everything. You don't need to check up on them for this.

If a child has allergies to animals then this should have been notified on the paperwork at the start of the year where it asks if they have any allergies. If any do, then this should have been taken into account in the risk assessments and most likely discussed with those specific childrens' parents.

You have what I would call a complete over-reaction.

duckdodgers · 21/01/2012 12:01

Well thank god it was only at nursery and you didnt need to take any of the animals home, I still have fond memories of springing hamsters and stick insects in the holidays onto my parents doing this when I was small.

tethersend · 21/01/2012 12:19

Look. Crossing the road with adult supervision is something we all let our children do, right?

Yet if nursery want to take your child out of school anywhere, they need your permission; not because it is a crazy thing to do, just because it's an increased risk.

It's the same.

MilitaryWag · 21/01/2012 12:34

Squeaky you have made me laugh hard at your posts Grin
OP...YABU. Unwrap the child from cotton wool and get a grip.

MardyArsedMidlander · 21/01/2012 12:38

It just seems sol sad that school is supposed to be part of a wider community- yet people are seriously suggesting that forms should be sent out to parents before a family pet can be brought into a school.
Perhaps it's because I grew up in the country, but surely any child scared of animals would be better to overcome those fears in the classroom under supervision?

Kladdkaka · 21/01/2012 12:40

I used to be a brownie/cubs leader and would take my 2 westies on our excursions into the forest. One parent regularly complained because her child was absolutely terrified of dogs. Oh really? Hmm He didn't ever seem particularly scared when he was jostling excitedly with the other kids to get a turn at holding the lead.

The first time I took the dogs was purely about saving myself going out again later. I'll keep them close to me and walk at the back kind of thing so as not to worry any of the children. 5 minutes in, we had a rota so that each child got a few minutes walking a dog. 10 minutes in we had a second rota so that each child got a few minutes walking the dog that they didn't walk on the first rota.

One time, one of the parents turned up with dog coats she'd made out of old uniform. The dogs were now officially pack members :o

catgirl1976 · 21/01/2012 12:55

Cannot believe the over reaction of some people.

I think given how some people seem to bring their children up to fear animals or never go near them it is probably good if a nursery tries to teach them some sensible behaviour and reactions.

Fo0ffyShmo0ffer · 21/01/2012 13:14

Everyone still piling in?

HilariousHmm

tethersend · 21/01/2012 13:32

So, can I assume that everyone is happy for their children's school/nursery to take the children out at any time without prior permission?

ChippingInLovesEasterEggs · 21/01/2012 14:04

Actually Tethers, I would, yes.

IMO a person/nursery/school is either able to look after a child properly or they aren't. If they are - let them get on with it and if they aren't - don't send your child there. Parents wanting someone else to look after their child yet micro manage every aspect of it should be shot - no exceptions.

catgirl1976 · 21/01/2012 14:09

Yes - more than happy.

tethersend · 21/01/2012 14:10

Fair enough. I wouldn't. I want to know in advance if the school is taking my child out.

Moreover, as a teacher, I am not comfortable taking a child out unless I have their parent or carer's permission.

catgirl1976 · 21/01/2012 14:11

In fact it would drive me mad if they asked my permission for everything that they did. I would rather they spent the time teaching my child and exposing them to as many epxeriences as possible than sending out and chasing up permission slips. I can't think of many situations where I would want them to get my prior permision for first.

tethersend · 21/01/2012 14:19

You see, it would drive me mad if DD's nursery invited parents and their dogs in without telling me.

We disagree, and that is fine as we all make different parenting decisions.

This is why I think the nursery should have informed parents beforehand

exoticfruits · 21/01/2012 14:20

I can see why the nursery has to ask permission but I wouldn't be sending my DC there if I didn't trust them. I can't think of a single thing that I have ever refused permission for with any of my 3 children. Life is for living, getting lots of experiences and I would assume that they are not going to be savaged by a ferret!

exoticfruits · 21/01/2012 14:21

And certainly not by a friendly dog!

Sadly the very sort of child who benefit from seeing ferrets and dogs is likely to have the fearful parent!

tethersend · 21/01/2012 14:22

How do you know it's a friendly dog?

catgirl1976 · 21/01/2012 14:26

I fnd it hard to believe the nursery would invite a rabid savage dog in

Plus its a labrador. You never hear of children being maimed by a labrador.

exoticfruits · 21/01/2012 14:29

If you think that the nursery is going to ask a dog in that can't be relied upon to be good with children you have to ask why on earth you are sending your DC there in the first place!!

tethersend · 21/01/2012 14:32

This is the problem- nurseries and schools are legally bound to act in loco parentis, but there are many, many decisions we make for our children that differ from one another; all of them valid.

I wouldn't be happy with this unless the handlers were professionals. I would not trust some of the parents at DD's nursery to do this.

tethersend · 21/01/2012 14:33

Not everyone has a choice of where to send their DC to nursery.

Nor should you have to withdraw your child from nursery because you don't want your child to come into contact with dogs for whatever reason.

HeadfirstForHalos · 21/01/2012 14:41

Oh God, one of the parents brought a tortoise into dc4s nursery a couple of months ago before it hibernated! I only found out weeks later when there were photos of it on the walls! I'm shuddering now at the thought of what horrors could have occurred because no consent forms were filled in!

fridakahlo · 21/01/2012 15:12

My dd had a whole term of having animals in from the local shelter. It didn't even occur to me to question this for one single second, why would it?
I was even lucky enough to get to be helper parent on a couple occaisions when they had animals in and got to squidge a beautiful puppy and a cutie small kitty.
And they also had someone bring in animals from philadelphia zoo. That was less fun, as they were not squidgy animals despite the request for a lemur/bushbaby.

tethersend · 21/01/2012 15:18

Having animals in from a local shelter or other organisation is very different from having family pets in with parents.