to want a horse? (Somewhat influened by saint Jilly)

[AtYourCervix]

Took DD to this place today where she'll be doing a short course rather than going to school (like she should be, bt she won't, so this is something to do)

Anyway.

Niiiice horses. All rescued and retired.

all horsey and soft and inquisitive bless them.

So I have decided, based on my extensive knowledge of horses, gleaned from in-depth study of Jilly Cooper books, that I'd rather like one of my own.

Only the garden isn't very big and I really have no idea what horses eat - except from polos and being stuffed with carrots.

I shall reread Riders and Polo and jump and consider getting my own.

What shall I call it?

SaggyOldClothCatPuss - Any horsey bloke you are likely to meet, will be long and lean and look like chewed up string, or short and fat with a 'ruddy' complexion! And a red nose! - yeah well then he will match my complexion. I have been described as being "as ruddy as a squire's daughter"!

That's just the thing, all the good horsey blokes are already married to capable squires daughter types like you! You haven't left any for the rest of us!

Do you live in Gloucestershire? I believe that horses from Gloucestershire are better.

Ooooh I loves my 'orses I does. Lovely, hairy, snuggly, gorgeous beauties...

....And sometimes utter fucking beasts of animals.

Ah I have yet to meet a good horsey bloke. Despite the complexion and the faint whiff of horse I give off at all times I have had no luck. Unless you count the one boy at Pony Club who did the rounds of all the girls way back in the early 80's?

i don't really want a bloke - unelss it's rupert or ricky.

hoss i met today was large and brown. with long eyelashes. i think he aswered to horsey. i will take him marmite on toast ext week.

lure him away with the marmite on toast. take him home to your house www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-scotland-16527541

The funny thing is, your marmite may well be appreciated! Some people believe it helps keep the flies off them in the summer. I tried it with mine and they just spat it out in disgust and the dog ate it.

Dpony likes to fart in my face as I'm picking out her back feet.She also snatched her hoof away from me and caught me on the back of the knee.I have a perfect horseshoe shaped bruise now.Good job I love her.

I find men in jodphurs very attractive,the dds used to have a riding instructor who looked very nice in a pair of joddies,bless him he was probably half my age.

You've all got it wrong, you must get racehorses. That's the kind where somebody else does all the tiresome cleaning/riding/mucking out bits and all you have to do is hang out with rich people who spend their time drinking, shagging and bribing jockeys. Oh, and you have to pout until DH has written the necessary cheques. Nothing to it really.

When my DC were young we had horses. I was a pony club mummy and used to get up at 5 on Saturdays to a) put plaits in ponies and b) put plaits in DD. I used to drive to the stables in my nighty and a pink fleecy dressing gown. The ponies were goggle eyed with horror!

i draw the line at getting up at 5. even for horsey. i hope he's a late riser.

Come borrow 1 of mine!

Have inside knowledge of horsey blokes. Married the long, lean, rolling in the hay, non-gay, looks great in breeches instructor and now have to share him with rich clients on two continents.

There's a lovely app on my iPad called My Horse , I can groom , feed and treat my horse ( a bay , named Beauty ) take her to shows and go eventing .
All from my sofa whilst having a glass of wine .
Perfick .
Yet to meet Rupert though .

another reason why i need an iphone.

I would marry my horse if I could, and if he hadn't been gelded.

Tinker. I worked at Newmarket a few times last summer. Believe me, there are very few lookers who hang about round race horses! They are generally common, overdressed and pissed! Oh, and broke from pissing their money away at the bookies!

I've only met two yummy horsey blokes. One is married to my best friend, the other is Joe Whittaker. He's half my age, lives on the other side of the country, and is from a famous family. Not much chance for a lumpy old hag like me! great for drooling over though