Is this too petty for words, or have I been snubbed?

[Ams25]

This feels really playground, so please bear with me. It has really upset me but maybe I am being over sensitive.
Yesterday I invited a friend over to play in the morning. I then texted back to ask if we could make it the afternoon, as I had promised my son we'd go to see my mum in the morning. My friend said fine, but she had a package arriving early afternoon, she'd let me know if she could make it. She didn't turn up or text me, so I assumed the package arrived late and she couldn't make it. But a mutual friend had texted me to ask me round, obviously I said no as I was seeing friend X. Friend Y then called me last night to say she was confused, she had also texted x who had gone round to play, so why hadn't I made it?

So I sat in all afternoon waiting for my friend, and also didn't go to see another friend, and basically she got a better offer and dumped me?! I texted her last night to say sorry I didnt see you yesterday, and she was evasive and implied she'd got busy with things at home. I feel really stupid now, and a bit hurt.

Should I just get over it, or should I say something?

I bet she was waiting for package, it arrived and she received text saying come over to my house (other mum), to play as you, OP were going to be there too.
I bet it's a misunderstanding not a snub. Pls try not to worry.

Didn't you get a better offer and dump her first by going to see your Mum in the morning rather than seeing her? Or is there a reason such as family illness why you needed to see your Mum which she knew about?

Seems like 6 of one to me.

Bossy,
It was a prior commitment that I'd forgotten about, but I see your point. I did think maybe she as annoyed with me for changing the arrangement and that's why she didn't show.

Poppy, maybe you're right. I think being at home full time means I can get things like this out of perspective.

It sounds like a very loose arrangement to me so I'm not sure why you stayed at home when your other friend contacted you?

But I'm afraid that my main thoughts are what adult plays at a friend's house, and wouldn't it be easier to ring people and talk up rather than all the texting? I am aware these thoughts are probably because I am probably an old fuddyduddy though! It just sounds like miscommunication to me.

Nooka, obviously I meant the children would be playing, not us.... Sorry, thought that was clear. Yes, grown ups playing would be a bit creepy! I know what you mean about texting, it just seems easier when we've all get at least two kids, you don't always get to the phone,myou can read a text at your leisure etc.

Think really the point you're making is this is a bit playground, which is what I suspected. Sorry all!

Ams - don't take it to heart and just give her a shout and rearrange another date.

The thing that is wrong here is that she lied. Just make her aware you know in a nice way by asking sweetly if there is a problem as you know she went to other friends house and you were waiting for her and you hope all is ok...

Sugar it up buy let her know YOU know.

I think it was all a misunderstanding. Better to speak than text. Just arrange another date.

Why do you think she lied? It's just as likely that the parcel arrived early as expected the other friend sent an invite and she forgot, or she thought as she had only said 'maybe' it wasn't a big deal, or she thought that the OP might be at the friends house already (although then you might have expected one of the friends to text the OP and reinvite). Storm in a teacup, but easy to let little things get to you when you are feeling a bit stuck at home perhaps.

Sometimes texts don't arrive.

You don't know what conversation Friend X and Friend Y had -- Friend X may have been under the impression that you were also going to be at Friend Y's (after all, Friend Y did invite you).

This is what happens when people arrange their lives by text rather than actually speaking to one another, I think.

It sounds like a misunderstanding to me.

When my dc were little and I was at home most of the time, I really appreciated my sham friends who were happy to be flexible and just went with the flow when things changed last minute. It happens a lot with small children and it should always work both ways. A bit of give and take on both sides is needed.

Try not to let this upset you. I don't think it was a snub.

Sounds like a misunderstanding, too many moving parts.

Thanks all. I'm just going to forget about it I think.

Sounds like a misunderstanding and miscommunication rather than a snub.

I suspect she may have felt snubbed by you saying you had to see your dm because you'd promised your ds? Couldn't you have said to him, oh I forgot X is coming round in the morning, we'll see dm this afternoon/tomorrow morning?

KitchenRoll, I am loving your sham friends.

Friend Y had prob told friend X that she was inviting both of you. Friend X prob then assumed that you were going round there as she had been loose in her arrangement with you, so thought she would go too and see both of you at once.

Crossed wires I reckon.