To want a bit of attention for dc2..

[tholeon]

Had dd a week ago. Also have a ds, who is two and a half. He came after years of infertility and now having them both is all i have ever wanted, and I know how lucky I am. But am also of course shattered - breast feeding every two hours night and day, and ds though lovely is also pretty wearing, and wants me all the time, not dh. So am also pretty tearful and emotional. Anyhow, when ds was born we got loads of attention, cards and flowers and presents. In comparison there has hardly been anything for dd. And i would like there to be! I don't mean i want expensive presents - I guess more that messages of affection - and yes attention - would help me get through the emotional exhausted bit. Dh says I am being spoilt - and am aware it is not a biggie in the grand scheme of things - but still... I always get cards and gifts for second and third babies, even when was feeling bitter and twisted cos I couldn't have my own. A I b u?

YABU and YANBU.

This is what happens to everyone and their second babies. I don't think it does them any harm, they are not aware of it.

You have to remember that some of the fuss surrounding your first baby is about you having your first baby. It's not directly about the baby, so YABU to expect that it will be the same again second time round.

YANBU to be a little put out about it though.

Well if it makes you feel better, I didn't get any cards etc. with DS and I doubt I will when the next one arrives.
People said congratulations if they saw us with DS but no major fuss was made. I didn't expect there to be anyway.

I think if your own family don't acknowledge the fact you've had a baby, it hurts.
I think it's a little greedy to EXPECT flowers/cards/balloons but simply taking the time to phone or text congratulations would be nice.

I think it's good to remember that having a baby seems like the most important thing ever to you but perhaps not to other people.

Someone mentioned being brought a bunch of crappy £3 flowers by their DH . . . I didn't even get that! One friend of mine was given flowers, chocs and a very expensive camera by her DH, another one was given a very pretty eternity ring . . . I didn't even get a fecking Mars bar!