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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To rent not own a house now I have a child?

105 replies

CharlieMumma · 15/01/2012 10:09

I rent my house privately with my dp and our ds. We don't earn enough to be able to get a big enough mortgage for a 3 bed house. So until we get pay rises and save a big deposit we are renting. I think It definitely has positives as webcam move easily for schools etc.

Have had a few comments from other friends who own and are married saying buying is best what about the security of your children you could get chucked out if landlord want house back and in the future what will u pass on to them etc?

Is renting really that reasonable?

OP posts:
Magneto · 15/01/2012 10:12

I rent and have a ds, like you we couldn't afford a mortgage. Landlords can't just kick you out with no notice and even if you do need to find somewhere else there are plenty of places to rent (at least there is where I am). Plus when I start looking at schools we can always just move to where the better schools are Grin

ViviPru · 15/01/2012 10:18

YANBU. The attitudes expressed by your friends are uninformed and shortsighted. And indicative of the problem with the UK housing situation which is peoples warped view of homeownership as some kind of holy grail. Like it is the only way of creating financial and domestic security. It is not.

Next time your 'friends' are rudely pressing these incorrect opinions on you, politely inform them that your family's security is no more at risk than the person who 'owns' a house but also owes the bank hundreds of thousands for it.

Heatherhills · 15/01/2012 10:19

Why do you need a 3 bed house? As a first time buyer you should be looking at 2 bed flats. Renting means you could potentially be moved against your will every 6 months which is very disruptive for a child and a nitemare for juggling work/child care/school/child's friends.

BornToBeRiled · 15/01/2012 10:20

Of course you can rent. You do what you think is best for your family at the time. What else can you do? Wouldn't help your dc if they couldn't eat because you were paying too big a mortgage would it?

Original poster
CharlieMumma · 15/01/2012 10:22

We want a house and want two children so would not move to a flat and would prefer the children have a room each. That's why we aren't buying till we can afford what we want. I have friends that have bought 1 bed houses because they wanted to own and now they are starting families they are stuck and can't move.

Thanks for the positive renting thoughts I agree and it's pretty much what I thought to - glad I'm not the only one!

OP posts:
brandysoakedbitch · 15/01/2012 10:24

I have to agree with HeatherHills why 3 bed house? I do think some people are fixated on owning property but from a long term financial standpoint surely it is better to won ones own home? If you cannot afford it then you cannot and no point losing any sleep over it but it does make sense on a lot of levels for the very long term. However, the being able to move into a good school area is a great point actually. I do fail to see how anyone can afford to save a sizeable deposit when they are privately renting though.

ViviPru · 15/01/2012 10:25

Heather. Renting does NOT necessarily mean you could potentially be moved against your will every 6 months. It often can mean that, but not necessarily. Why should the OP have to settle for a home that does not suit her familys' needs just to satisfy some misguided, dated notion that homeownership is more secure?

Original poster
CharlieMumma · 15/01/2012 10:26

Brandy - saving the deposit is difficult but we have to live somewhere so renting it is. We are saving slowly but also we don't really earn enough to borrow much. 3 bed house ideally as said below we would like two children and like the space. Would look at 2 bed houses. Deffo wouldn't want a flat.

OP posts:
PavlovtheCat · 15/01/2012 10:27

i own my own flat (now maisonette) with 2 children. I bought pre-children and redundancy etc meant moving upwards has just not happened. luckily we have had the ability to extend into the loft and turn it from 2-3 bedrooms.

Had I been renting at the time we had children, I would not have bought a property. Certainly not in this climate.

Original poster
CharlieMumma · 15/01/2012 10:28

Also we sign yearly tenancys so are secure for the year, and have had no issues renewing the last 2 years. Even allowed pets etc and the broken boiler wasn't our problem Wink

OP posts:
Newtothisstuff · 15/01/2012 10:30

I hate owning my own house... Wish I could just sell it and get rid.. It's been the biggest burden EVER !! It's currently rented out and we are in married qtrs as my dh is forces.. If I could sell it I would.. It's just not worth what I paid for it.. Ignore what people say if you have to rent so what.. Not a lot of first time buyers can afford it in this day and age !!

ViviPru · 15/01/2012 10:30

Good for you OP.

As a simultaneous landlord and tenant, I have lots of experience with this and know what I am talking about.

"from a long term financial standpoint surely it is better to own ones own home?" this is simply not true. Homeownership can be a sensible investment, but every single persons circumstances are different. The OP sees the benefit of owning a property, but is not going to buy for the sake of it if she is not in a potion to buy a suitable home YET.

It sounds like you have a fair and responsible landlord, OP. I know not everyone is as fortunate, but while you are, you should enjoy it and ingore your friends.

ViviPru · 15/01/2012 10:31

position, not potion!!

brandysoakedbitch · 15/01/2012 10:32

The thing is to try and find something you can add value to - maybe with a lof conversion? This is the way to make the leap out of the trap of only being able to afford an unsuitable property. But honestly saving whilst paying rent is a nightmare, I take my hat off to you, many of my friends have just given up on this as they just cannot make inroads into it and have resigned themselves to long term renting. I myself am a Landlord of a couple of properties and I would say from my point of view that Landlords want tenants in for as long as possible so I do think the notion of having to move every few months is a bit inaccurate as it does not make sense for anyone.

I agree that the English are a bit obsessed with home ownership but honestly having properties that I can liquidate in the future is a great comfort to me (granted the mortgages are paid for by other people!) but I have a little girl with ASD and may need to provide for her financially for her life so this is a good thing for us.

ViviPru · 15/01/2012 10:32

In fact, your friends are probably jealous of your spacious rented house as mine are

Original poster
CharlieMumma · 15/01/2012 10:33

Thanks vivi I do have other renting friends who are happy but we were getting irritated by the 'you must own' brigade of friends so its nice to hear other positives about renting!

OP posts:
Pekka · 15/01/2012 10:35

We are currently expecting our 1st child. We rent, but would love to own a house. Cannot afford the mortgage or the deposit, so it looks like we will be renting for a long time.

ViviPru · 15/01/2012 10:36

But brandy, successful and financially rewarding property investment/improvement is a skill (as you should know) and not for everyone. The recent property bubble fooled everyone into thinking it was something anyone could do. Its working for you but you are in very different circumstances to the OP

Heatherhills · 15/01/2012 10:36

Vivi home ownership is more secure. Legally under the 1988 Act landlords can evict without any reason at all. Banks are not legally allowed to repossess unless you are in severe arrears.

MoreBeta · 15/01/2012 10:37

Renting is not a problem and has significant advantages over owning. People have a fixation about property ownership in this country. We have lived in rented for nearly 30 years and have two nearly teenage children now.

We live in a far bigger house, a far nicer area, for far less money than if we had bought. More to the point I have never decorated a house, never repaired a boiler or indeed anything. Never had to pay for it either.

People talk about security of owning their own home. Well I say, try selling your house in a hurry or paying a mortgage if you lose your job. About 10 yerars ago we were in real financial difficulty and we moved out of a very smart flat in a very expensive part of London to a tiny 2 bed house in a provincial town to make ends meet. A few years later we were back on our feet. If we had not been renting we would have not been able to cut our costs so quickly and might well have gone under.

Financial security comes from flexibility to move to a new job and cut your living costs in this day and age. Of course you are exosed to rental and house price inflation but that seems unlikely at the moment.

catgirl1976 · 15/01/2012 10:39

I rent. It is much preferable to me than "owning" a house which is a very British obsession. Most of Europe rents. If the roof caves in it's not my problem, I can live in nicer places than I could buy, changes to interest rates don't affect me, I can move area any time I want.

Hard to see a downside really. Tell your friends to jog on :)

DesperatelySeekingSedatives · 15/01/2012 10:40

If you're unreasonable then so am I Hmm I can't afford to buy either so the 4 of us are renting a little 2 bed cottage right now until we can afford something slightly bigger (probably a bigger 2 bed place) in the area we like.

As for something to pass on DC in the future, well, you can tell your uninformed friends that just because you own your home doesn't mean you'll have anything to leave your DC when you die. My grandparents had longed paid off their mortgage when they both needed to go and live in a nursing home and the house used to pay for their care. None of us will be left with a penny. Doesn't matter- much rather THEIR money was spent on THEM.

YuleingFanjo · 15/01/2012 10:44

I kind of agree as I am a bit stuck in our mortgages 2 bedroom home and would be able to get a much nicer house and, more importantly, some outside space if I rented. on the other hand it's a bit silly being sniffy about other people's choices when really you haven't made a decision not to buy you have just been unable to buy and say yourself that when you are able to you will do so.

brandysoakedbitch · 15/01/2012 10:44

Actually it is not that skilled vivipru - I am a daft arse and I have managed it (I did get my mortgages when they were just giving them away though......) I think it is a just a matter of research. How much are the housing allowances in the area vs. how much are the houses. As long as they remain rented there is never a problem, the problem for btl landlords is that when they need to liquidate they had such small deposits is that they were wiped out by the fall in house prices. I reality if you can just keep renting during the storm then there is not a problem.

I do think in the OPs position I would rent too though. Friends of mine have faced choices (as we live in v expensive South of England area) about waiting and waiting to have families so they can buy somewhere first and then realising that this then means they have such a huge mortgage that they cannot stop working to take care of their little ones. The only people I know that have managed to buy a house and set themselves up around here have had help from their parents and have been gifted deposits etc, also help with free child care etc.

PavlovtheCat · 15/01/2012 10:44

desperately that happened to my DHs grandparents, or grandmother in fact. She lived in US. was a $millionaire. Became unwell at around 70 and lived for 15 years with almost 24hour care and all her money evaporated. Pretty much every penny. But, that was US though.

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