to not need every food to come with instructions/suggestions.

[Funtimewincies]

OK, I'm not in the best of moods at the moment, but I'm oddly annoyed by the bag of lemons in my kichen, the label of which cheerfully informs me that they are 'ideal for zesting and drinks'.

That's good, as I was planning on seeing how many I could fit up my arse before taking myself off to A&E to show them how clever I am .

Similarly, a packet of raisins tells me that they are 'ideal for home baking or adding to breakfast cereals or yoghurt. I glad that they've cleared this one up as I've been wondering why my raisins havn't been getting my washing as clean as my usual stuff.

AIBU to be irritated by the presumption that I, as a consumer, must be utterly cluless?

Or a suggestion that needs real committment. Serve your rice on a plate floating in front of the Taj Mahal

I ranted quite spectacularly yesterday over the laminated notice stuck to the front of the wall heater in the cafe, which read 'Heath and Safety Notice - This Heater May Get Hot'.

I do have a few photos of my dear departed cat wearing a pair of yellow Mr Potato Head glasses :)

Thanks for making me laugh and its nice to know I am not the only pedant in the village! :o

If I tried to put glasses on my present cat I'd end up bleeding and swearing.

You need to look here

Calorie advice on a bar of cooking chocolate said 'Quarter of a pack provides...' and the were 15 squares. It was like some hideous maths puzzle.

You'd need a warning on the glasses then peerie . NOT INTENDED FOR FELINE USE perhaps?

On a hotel provided shower cap in a box:
Fits one head.

ModreB my first thought was ....not one penis then ??? just in case someone was desperate and had forgotten to bring their condoms ??

Trumpton I was thinking more along the lines of communal showering, you know, 1 cap, 2 heads

Oh God. I am now going through the kitchen looking at warning labels. What have you done to me OP?

On a jar of Nutella : May contain nuts. No shit Sherlock.

You (plural) might want to take note of these instructions for canned soup: www.eatliver.com/i.php?n=8258.

I bought a slow cooker which came with one of those recipe books. It suggested I add vegetables, including baby aborigines

Even my hummus tub had a suggestion on. I ranted on FB about it. The recipe started "take 6 sausages..."
No thanks, I'll take the tub and a very large spoon

Ha ha very funny! I like it

I think the reason for the "serving suggestion" photo is so that people don't complain that the box didn't actually contain a bowl, spoon and milk, as well as the rice crispies

On a packet of tights:

Wash by hand ONLY.

If washing in a machine, use a laundry bag. WTAF

This is why I hated the Nutella ad of a while back, that went 'we all love toast... but what can you put on it?' Yeah, it is so hard to think of things that might be served on/with toast!

My personal favourite.

A packet of pomegranite seeds, 'may contain seeds'

Hmmm

This is cheering me up no end.

I was shelling an old bag of monkey nuts for the bird feeder (bought to hang out for them in their shells but the feathery twerps didn't cotton on, so I'm shelling them). The back of the bag said 'Caution! This recipe contains peanuts'. It is a bag of peanuts.

EightiesChick - personally, I only buy Nutella for eating from the jar to make those addictive microwave mug cakes. It never sees a slice of toast.

Guffawing at Nytol warning.

DD1 gets very annoyed with her ventolin inhaler labled.
"keep out of reach and sight of children"
Being a child, she wonders how on earth she's support to take it.

Crisps made with "real" ingredients mystify me.

Supposed to take it

I hate when it says "Serve and enjoy"?! No, I bustled round a busy supermarket, queued up for half an hour while only 3 out of the 14 fucking tills were open...then spent an hour cooking the bloody thing. If I don't want to enjoy it that's my decision. For all they know I might enjoy the misery of being a sodding martyr!!!!