AIBU regarding DH's Christmas present to me.

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Ok get the biscuits ready. DH hates shopping and is not very good at it when required to do so. Fast forward to Christmas. I've done all present buying, including my own (I prefer this as I like to get stuff I want at good price). Bought myself some M&S pyjamas, some socks, a £12 scarf and some make-up that I would have bought anyway but just wrapped for something to open in front of family. DH told very clearly I would like some £35 perfume, it's name and where to get it. This was all he had to do. He arrives home on Christmas eve with three libertys bags and puts under tree. I say nothing, wider family staying with us, wrong time etc. Open on christmas morning, there is a cardigan, a scarf and some soap. Soap, fine I can live with, but clothes all wrong for me. Explain very nicely I'd like to return and can I have receipts. Got these this morning as was going in with friend to exchange purchases today. After he'd left for work looked at cost. Cardigan and scarf equalled £1102. I felt sick, we cannot afford this and he knows I'm saving up to buy a piano for the family. Left a very impolite message on his mobile, and went to libertys with friend where all they would do is give me a credit note to be used in 6 months. We hunted round but nothing obvious that was me or my comfortable price bracket. To explain this expenditure will not place us in debt or financial ruin, but delays things like getting piano, cheaper holiday etc. All he could say was I wanted to spoil you. All I can think is it's irresponsible, lazy impulse buying on Christmas eve at a shop I have never shown any interest in on items I have never asked for. Incidentally if anyone is a libertys fan I am happy to sell the credit note for £800.

Did everyone miss the poster at the end of page three offer to buy the credit note for full value?

OP YABVVVU and un-gracious. Your dh wanted to spoil you because he loves you. Don't you realise how lucky you are to be in that position?

He may not have chosen things to your taste, but he made an effort. You are now lucky enough to have a substantial credit note for a beautiful shop. Use it in the spirit in which it was given.

If I was your dh, I would be really hurt by your attitude and you'd be getting at box of Milk Tray next year.

He has done something nice for you FGS, enjoy it, don't moan about it!

I am very surprised that liberty wont take it back for refund if it was a christmas present, thats really bad customer service esp with how much has been spent.

I would write to liberty and ask them again to consider allowing you a refund.

Is this a stealth 'Look how rich I am' post?

I'M JOKING!!!!!

I can see both sides, it is a very OTT and lazy pressie, but I think my response might have been 'Wow that was so sweet and generous of you but i absolutely can't keep it'. You have a long time to find someone to buy the credit note from you or keep checking if there's anything big there you want.

That was very sweet of your dh, but YANBU. It is a lot for a scarf and cardigan. If he wanted to spoil you, I know for us ladies a nice bit of jewllery would have been better, it lasts and keeps its value and can be passed down to your children.

Keep the credit note, and get something nice later on. I agree with verity to some extent, it was very kind and generous and you now have a credit note that you could get something really nice with it instead. So treat it like the spirit in which was given, go to Liberties one day and get something really lovely, which you can say that your dh bought for you for Christmas. Wish my dh would go to stores like that, he can afford it but is very tight and savvy with money.

I can't imagine having £1000 to spend in Liberty's and not being able to find anything.

Unless he does stuff like this with money all the time (and a Mulberry handbag doesn't count) you are being unreasonable and ungrateful, and possibly a little churlish even.

Go into the furniture dept and ask them if they can source you an Arts and Crafts piano stool, then get it covered in Liberty fabric. You can also buy yourself a nice Liberty lawn shirt

Then tell him if he wants to be extravagant next christmas, to save up throughout the year, not bash the bank account.

I would also contact liberty and see if they will refund rather than a credit note. Maybe point them in the direction of this thread? I am sure we would all be impressed by their customer service if they were to refund you. It actually puts me off when a store is so inflexible. I returned a Couple of things to cath kids ton that my dh had bought in a last minute Christmas panic but was able to get a refund and buy again what I wanted at sale price. I would be like u too. My dh buys me lovely things and is very generous but I would balk at that sort of money on a cardigan and scarf!

I would find it hard to find a thousand pounds worth of stuff that I wanted from liberty's though. And if it is not to the op's taste, I would resent choosing stuff just for the sake of it. What a shame he didn't go into John Lewis or somewhere with more choice.

I would be livid too. Does he realise that he has been a complete idiot and caused you a lot of stress? That is really not the point of a gift!

just reading online their sale conditions, and it says purchases from London store can be returned for refund with in 14 days, which I guess you are just outside now.

Harrods and Selfridges would have been better, you have more designer brands and of course Tiffanys there, and I would most certainly find a few things for £1k there.

eurochick that sounds really ungrateful, all the poor man wanted to do was to splash out on op and make her feel special, what's wrong with that! There are lots of things op can buy from Liberties with the credit note.

Gosh that is very irresponsible of him. People are saying his heart is in the right place, but he is clearly not thinking of your future when he wastes such a huge amount of money that you can ill afford.

If you really cannot get a refund, I would try and exchange it for either practical things you can use such as furniture; or jewellery that should retain it's value.

What I would find wrong with it, if it were my DH, is the staggering lack of insight into what I value.

Ditziness, just checked the poster didn't offer full value, she offered £800 when the op husband spent £1102. So she would still lose £300 taking that offer. I think we should get the pr person at liberty to see this thread. There has been some good publicity for them here, even more if they were to offer full refund.

that's a good point marblerye. It is vital for a couple to share the same values, or at least respect each others values.

Op I suggest you take a firm hold of the family finances.

Am I the only one who does a hint list at the end of november and leaves it lying around? Nope? Just me then

I'd be gutted op. Yanbu. Can you put the credit note on eBay?

I would be mad too, but what's done is done. Think he was trying to be nice and romantic. My DH spebt £500 on something I have wanted for years. DD is almost 4 so we haven't really bothered with presents for each other for a few years, spending on her and the house instead so he was really very sweet to put some thought into it--BUT at the back of my mind I still thought-that would repair the conservatory roof !

but now it's done - get Fatima's Rhino---love it..

Well don't moan then when your dh/dp get you a box of choccies or Poundshop stuff for Christmas. Reading some of the posts here, its easy to see why some men don't bother. It would be different if the dh spending that money put them into debt but it does not, the op has said that it would not damage the finances, but means they have to delay buying a piano. It must be me, and my love of luxury items, I would love it if dh went to town in Harrods or Selfridges but unfortunately no, he can afford a little splurge but is quite tight. Thing is, he is always getting himself expensive collectable sci fi statues and signed autograpths.

oh yes of course because there is no middle ground between a box of chocolates and more then a 1000 pounds worth of clothes is there

I too first read it as £102 and thought, since it didn't put you in debt or anything, YWBabitU. But £1000+ spent on Christmas Eve on stuff you don't like screams lack of thought and effort to me. And that would annoy me quite a bit. If he'd spent weeks looking and got it wrong I would have thought it was sweet if a bit worrying that he knew me so badly. But lots of money on stuff you don't like on Christmas Eve is a very different thing. So YANBU.

I wonder if your DH is not entirely onboard with your joint spending priorities. He may resent being as frugal with presents in general ( yours, his, and others), want you to be a bit more indulged and/or think wrapping up things you would buy anyway is very anti-the spirit of gift giving. Of course if that's the case he should bloody well talk to you about it and get more involved in the gift buying all round, not buy hideous over priced cardigans on Christmas Eve.

She got a credit note, so she can get something she wants then, receive the gift in the good faith in which it was given. No point dwelling on it, use the credit note on something you do like and want.

YANBU... I cannot imagine going out in a scarf and cardigan worth over £1k.
Receipt was for Xmas Eve.... its a panic buy... doubly annoying when you have done everything for Xmas with loads of planning

I had my wedding list at Liberty and we ended up with lovely things but at comparatively sensible prices - a picnic hamper, Waring blender, tapestry stuff, Emma Bridgewater china set, some Indian silver lassi beakers, some great bedlinen, and some terrific pans - all treasured and still going strong.