To be mightily pissed off with ex DH for leaving our 3 1/2 yr old alone in the flat?!

[CuppaTeaAndAJammieDodger]

He was over seeing DD yesterday evening (as he does once or twice a week) and I was late home from a meeting - walking up to the front door I saw him leaving the flat, he bumped in to me and went umm err just popping out to get some cigarettes, DD's in bed, I've left the doors open and off he went.

FFS - if she'd got up to find him not there and the doors open she'd have gone looking for him, as well as the fact that a 3 1/2 year old cannot fend for herself, and what if something had happened to him when he was out?!?

He did this once (well, that I know of) before when we were still together (over a year ago so she was even younger) and I went mad at him and said not to do it again. Seems it didn't skink in very well.

skink??? SINK!

um, OMG.
I'd have gone ballistic. Presumably he had no idea you were due home?

YANBU - He was being totally irresponsible. Perhaps he should not be left alone with your daughter until he can learn his responsibilities and be more aware ! If he would leave her alone like that - god knows what else he would allow her to do that may be dangerous.

Think he thought I was going to be home later (he just knew I had a meeting to go to).

YANBU.

Completely out of order!

Thanks, thought as much, I was fuming - going to have words with him

I don't think anyone will disagree that it would be irresponsible to leave a young child alone for an indefinite amount of time.

However ... before you go in all guns blazing - is it possible that he saw or heard you coming in and didn't actually leave the flat until he knew you were on your way?

It did cross my mind but he was totally unaware of me being there until he literally bumped in to me and then kinda stammered when explaining where he was going (i.e. knew he'd be in trouble) - and he has form

OK. Time for a proper sit-down talk about this one. As in 'I'm really furious about the other night, is there any reason why i shouldn't be?'

Honestly, I'm not sure I'd leave a DC with such person ever again.

Doors open?
Maddie?

No!

I know - ridiculous, not quite sure why he thought leaving the doors open was a good thing....no idea what was going through his mind. I won't see him until Monday now, which is probably a good thing as it'll give me time to calm down.

I also wouldn't be able to leave my child with him again after this. He's been told not to do it once before and did it again...anything you say will just be ignored again.

errr deja vu!

they do have a great relationship and he is very hands on with her - he is just fucking irresponsible (one of the main reasons we split up), I'd hate for her not to see him, but I think you may be right; supervised visits may be the only way forward for the time being

raginmull are confussed about this sounding just like the cider thread yesterday!!

What's goign on? Dd this start with baby, progress to toddler and now its a pre schooler!

It is indeed very odd, this spate of home alone pre-schoolers

I think it's out of order but I also don't see why you need to know that from us/MN before you have words with him.

assuming there have been some similar threads recently - how exciting, my first troll accusation :)

Afraid to say this is true, wish it wasn't the case.

Ample, wanted to get some other opinions as I've already had serious words with him and according to him it's "normal" to dash out for 5 minutes and leave your child alone - now I know that is a load of crap but it is reassuring (possibly not the right word to use) to know that other mums feel the same way

sorry StrandedBear don't understand your question

I think StrandedBear is referring to the spate of posts about partners/ex partners leaving VERY young children home alone whilst they dash to the shops, OP.

As to your OP, I'd point out that no, it's not normal. Especially when DD is so small. Had she been a sensible 8/9 yo, that may be a different matter

Is this a competition?

Op are you a name changed from someone who used to have the initials ctj?
Not a troll accusation, promise, just always ondwred