to want to smash this bloody XBox to teeny tiny shards of metal and plastic!!!

[NewYearsDaysie]

DH has an XBox. Everytime I leave the room for more than 2 minutes I come back to find that bloody controller in his hand..its like an addiction. He even gets up early on a morning to play these games. I don't mind if I'm not there but they are so repetative (especially when he keeps dying on COD..bang bang..arghhhh, bang, bang, arghhhh, bang bang, arghhh....) that when you're in teh room you can't concentrate on anything else (hence the oodles of spelling mistakes I'm sure!) Plus these games are classified as 18 usually but he plays them in front of DCs who are 1,4 and 5, but yet won't let them watch Doctor Who cos its a bit scarey!
Vent over.

oh i worded it wrong sigh and I AM NOT BOSSY

what i meant was isnt life about compromise and when husbands/partners spend all evening on an Xbox ignoring and huffing at people when they might like to chat or watch a telly programme then it becomes an issue ,

My dh is a Fifa 12 nut. In my harsher moments I think it makes a man seem very immature when they are sitting there, fretting over their imaginary football teams. In my heart of hearts, I feel consoles are for kids. In my less harsh moments, I think dh works hard, why shouldn't he do whatever he finds relaxing. Is it worse than my dad's chosen hobby of fishing?

Otoh, dh doesn't really get what I see in MN, so I am trying to go with an 'each to their own' attitude.

It does worry me a bit that we are both so absorbed in our individual screens, but think this is symptomatic of having kids and not having much money to go out and do more interesting things all the time.

On the bright side, all the dc get involved too and spend ages discussing which players they are going to buy and sell.

Did I say that was a bright side...

otchayaine

you can talk perfectly fine while playing a game and how is reading any different?

reading requires imagination

plus it's rude to talk to someone while doing something else. sure, we talk to our partners and family while doing things, such as cooking, or listening to music, but ask yourself this: would you play a game while you had guests? Why is spending time with your family any different.

I'm not alone what a relief!!!
LivingDead...oh the slack jawed look and the bobbing up and down as though you're on a storm bashed boat PLUS DH also chews his tongue at the same time...I looked at hime the other day and said in a sarky voice 'I've never wanted you more.'

You need to talk to him about this.. seriously. He shouldn't be playing it when the kids are there.. maybe hide the controllers and pretend the kids must have done it!

I wrote a long post but it got eaten.

We all play wii and xbox games here, individually and as a family, but the time is limited. Its a hobby, its no different than being engrossed in a book or facebooking etc.We are lucky to have a sperate room for the games though.

When we have guests its usually requested for the wii to be switched on. Its great fun to watch grumpy fil having fun with dd and beats listening to fil moan.

Consoles can be a great release of stress and I dont see any problem with adults playing on them as long as its not excessive which sounds to be the ops dhs problem. I agree that COD should be not played in front of the children,(dp plays on a weekend while I do something else with dd) Could you not agree on set nights for him to play when the kids are in bed and maybe some time at the weekend also?

I've talked about it...Im just told that this is his interest like reading and MNing is mine. I'm not disputing that though..I'm disputing the fact that he can't stop playing games.
If I am actually watching TV he is on his phone playing some weird zombie thing and if he's not on his phone he's on the laptop ... on games. We do have another room with a little TV that he won't use cos .. the TV is too small, and yes I could go in there but I would like to see my hubby when the kids aren't there.
What really makes me sad tho is he encourages me to go and have a nice long soak, go to the supermarket, go out to someone's house, do the dishwasher, have an early night...all so he can go on his console I feel like he wants the XBox more than me. and on teh other hand if I am interested in a book he can't let me just read I have to listen to him and he interupts constantly!!
aaaannnnnd breeeathe!!!
(i'm wondering if he's trying to get away from other issues though which I won't post on here cos it would take ten pages!)

And i've also told him coutless times about the playing of COD, Halo and other stuff in front of the kids. He says OK then ignores me. +

I'm not coming from an x-box hating view point, I have one myself and enjoy playing it and I know it can suck you in for entire days at a time if you let it.. but I don't! I only do it when I'm on my own and nothing else needs doing (which obviously is rare!!). My husband is the same.. he loves his Fifa etc but doesn't play it unless he's got a day off and is the only one in the house..

He needs to accept that he just can't play it as much. Easy for me to say I know..

DH is like this with his iphone. When we go shopping at the weekend he trails behind me looking at it. I have fantasies about smashing the bloody thing up.. i've come close to carrying them out once or twice. It is bloody infuriating, embarrassing and sad!

He has an xbox but doesn't play it when I am there and anyway I have a playstation so I couldn't complain about that too much . He'd never play in in front of the kids 'cos i'd kick his arse!

YANBU, I love the wii but everything in moderation etc.

Would not be at all happy with those games being played in front of DCs especially given the hypocrisy WRT doctor who!

I wonder why so many adults have become addicted to playing.

I can't imagine one or two generations ago, people in their 30s or 40s (or even 20s!) playing games for hours.

They were proper grown ups back then

I wonder if it's because, I dunno, people aren't growing up as fast, or it's a way of relaxing or escaping - or whether if our grandads had had such things they would in fact have spent 10 hours a day on the bloody things. Somehow, I can't see it.

I do wonder what the reason is.

Sit tight. Odds are that your xbox will at some point become afflicted with The Red Ring of Death. There will be a few weeks of frantic activity while everyone tries to work out how to fix it. And then there will be silence. Glorious silence.

And then they will bring out the Wii.

YANB at all U. No games console in our house but I am very much a smart phone widow...it's never otu of his bloody hand!!

He needs to grow up.

My DH loves his XBox, plays CoD etc - but not in front of our toddler!

Also if he's playing all the time, when does he do any housework or play with the kids?

Then tell him how you feel about it and tell him you don't want him playing violent games in front of your DC and that you need to come to a sensible compromise.

DH usually plays when the kids are in bed (but will occasionally play non-violent games or puzzles in the daytime) and he at least has the courtesy to use earphones so I can hear the TV or at least hear myself think. I also grumble at him when he makes himself totally incommunicado by being plugged in at both ears so I can't discuss things with him at all.

It's about basic respect and consideration for others, really. I have no objection to consoles and don't mind the games, so long as the kids don't get to see any gore, violence or badly animated lapdances and I don't feel like I'm permanently on my own because of it.

Your OH needs to just plain grow up.

I remember my nan complaining because my granddad spent the whole of Saturday afternoons alternating between Grandstand and World of Sport. she would ask him to hoover and he's just turn the vacuum on and periodically move it from one side of the armchair to the other, so it sounded like it was moving!

I guess consoles are the modern equivalent.

These computer games ARE addictive. In a darker moment, or you could say more realistic moment, you could say they were DESIGNED to be that way.

Either way it means we have to take control of our own lives in some way by limiting the grip of such technology.

My dh thinks mn is addictive, and I can see his point when I'm in the middle of a really good thread and don't want to leave it in order to talk to him.

Me, hypocrite? Nah

Yes, all these things are potentially addictive I guess Karma. My only defence re. Mumsnet (I had to think up one quick!) is that I come here only a few times a year when I am really puzzled or confused or upset about something* - and then get sucked in by the intellectual/emotional excitement of it all! But computer games, not quite the same.

*But then my Mumsnet experience is usually spoilt by some eejit somewhere along the line, and I wish I hadn't bothered (see my Dire Men thread)

I don't even have this problem with my nearly 15 year old! On the odd occasion where his playing starts to get a bit out of control, I take the power cable and hide it to make a point.

I like computer games, but you have to be reasonable and even my Ds knows which games are unsuitable to play in front of his little sister (nearly 5). If your DH is incapable of behaving like an adult then you will have to treat him like a child.